


Love Triangle

by SneetchesToo



Category: Code Black (TV)
Genre: Angst, Daddy!Ethan, F/M, Family, Humor, Mommy!Leanne, Original Character - Freeform, Romance, Slightly Alternate Universe, Slow Burn, There’s a few surprises
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-24
Packaged: 2019-04-18 21:20:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 65,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14222025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SneetchesToo/pseuds/SneetchesToo
Summary: “Some mommas and daddiesAre loving in a straight line;Take forever to heartAnd take a long sweet ride.But some mommas and daddiesLet their heart strings tear and tangle,And some of us get stuckIn a love triangle.”-Love Triangle by RaeLynn





	1. Eleanor

**Author's Note:**

> *The rating is subject to change by chapter, but I will put a warning at the beginning of any of those that might be more than Teen rated.  
> **I couldn’t help myself. It’s obviously slightly AU. I’m gonna try to stick as close to canon as possible.

Leanne did a double take as she pulled the curtain of the small area back. Angus had told her that there was a young patient waiting for x-ray and that while the young girl seemed to be holding it together well, she was starting to become impatient. Angus thought Leanne could help. _Angus was an idiot._

“Hi.” Leanne’s voice cracked, the girl in front of her looking every bit like the frantic Army Colonel she had just passed in the hallway. Her light brown hair was pulled into a side braid and her gray eyes, those damn gray eyes, were staring back at her brightly. Leanne shook her head back and forth, _this had to be a joke._

“Hi.” The little girl replied and it brought Leanne from her thoughts. 

Eyeing her curiously Leanne moved forward to check out the girl’s arm that was loosely wrapped in an ace bandage. “I’m Leanne.” Her voice was soft, and whether it was from curiosity or fear, or a little of both, she wasn’t sure.

“Eleanor.” The girl’s voice was soft, and the closer Leanne got, the more she realized there was no denying that this girl belonged to Dr. Willis in some way, shape, or form. “You can call me Ellie. All of my friends do.”

“Well hi there Ellie.” Leanne removed the bandage as gently as she could and smiled softly when the girl didn’t so much as flinch at her touch. “What happened?”

“I fell down at school.” The voice that answered her was shaky, and Leanne looked up, her eyes connecting with a very uncertain pair of gray ones. “I think it’s broken.”

Pulling her gaze from the young girl’s, Leanne went back to her exam, placing her arm gently in her lap when she was done. “Well Ellie, I believe you are correct.”

The girl simply nodded her head, tugging gently on her braid with her free hand. Leanne could see the tears on the brink of falling and she reached out to pat the girl’s cheek, hoping to offer some sort of comfort. “Where are your parents Ellie?”

“Mom’s, out, I guess.” The tone with which the young child responded was not what Leanne expected, and it broke her heart because she figured that was probably the girl’s best guess most of the time.

“What about your dad?” She asked softly, she watched as the girl got ready to respond and was holding her breath, when the curtain flew open behind her.

“Eleanor!” And there was the answer Leanne had been fearing. Standing before her was the one and only Dr. Ethan Willis. The gray eyes matching those of her young patient were dark, and she could see the way his hands trembled slightly.

“Hi daddy.” The girl’s voice was quiet, but Leanne heard no fear, which was comforting considering how she had sounded when asked about her mother.

Ethan stepped forward, moving around Leanne without a second thought, and reached out to take her left arm in his hands. “What happened baby?” 

Leanne watched with what she could only describe as loving eyes. She had always known Ethan was good with children, he always seemed to have a soft spot for their youngest patients, and now she knew why. 

“I fell down at school.” Ellie’s voice stayed quiet, and Leanne watched as she eyed her father curiously. “I told Aunt Mae to bring me here.”

Letting out a sigh Ethan finally turned to her, his hands still holding his daughter’s arm softly. “Has she been to X-Ray yet?”

Shaking her head back and forth Leanne struggled to find her voice. Feeling like she was observing something she was never meant to be part of. “No. Not yet.”

“Okay.” Ethan turned his attention back to the young girl and offered her a soft smile. “You stay put okay sweetie. I’m gonna go talk to Leanne for a minute.”

The girl nodded her head and the smile that graced her face when her father placed a kiss to her head made Leanne’s heart flutter. She watched as Ethan stood, gesturing for her to lead the way, and she offered Ellie one last smile before walking out.

She could feel Ethan behind her, his gaze boring into the back of her head, and she felt bad. She felt like she had betrayed him somehow. Like she had just discovered his biggest, darkest secret. Like she had just finally cracked the code that was the mysterious Ethan Willis.

“She’s six.” Ethan’s voice was softer than she expected and when she turned around she was met with a much softer look than before. “Her mom has custody, but I get her every other weekend now too. I’ve been fighting to get her full time since I came to LA.” He ran a hand through his messy hair and leaned back against the wall behind them. “It’s why I came back.”

Leanne simply nodded her head, her pen moving along the chart in her hands on its own accord. She didn’t even know what she was writing at this point, she just wanted to keep her hands busy. “You owe me nothing Ethan. It’s your business. I don’t need an explanation.”

Ethan sighed, reaching out gently to still her trembling hand. “But I owe you one.” His voice was softer than she thought it had ever been, and her heart stopped in her chest at the look in his eyes. “You’re my best friend Leanne, I shouldn’t have kept something like this from you.” He pulled his hand back, rubbing at his face with both hands. “I’m sorry.”

“Have you known about her all along?” Leanne’s voice quivered and she prayed that Ethan kept his cool. Because if it had been her, she would’ve lost her shit already.

“Yeah.” Ethan hung his head as he lowered his voice so that the girl couldn’t hear him. “I got a call from her aunt, my step-sister, she said I needed to come home. I talked to my CO.” He rubbed his hands over his face again, the memory of his 2:00am phone call to General Hutchins seeming like it happened yesterday. “He got me the first transfer out of Baghdad.”

“Oh. Okay.” Leanne didn’t know what else to say, her brain was starting to hurt from the influx of information coming at her. 

Ethan reached forward again, gripping her arm gently. “I know it’s a lot to take in.”

Nodding her head, Leanne let out a sigh, refusing to meet his eyes with hers, she set her gaze on his hands. “Does anyone else know?” She felt her voice shake, and if she had been nervous before, well she didn’t know what this feeling was.

“Noa and Rollie.” His reply shocked her, _Noa, really? _She wanted to say she wasn’t slightly jealous of the relationship the younger resident had with the man in front of her, but then she’d be lying.__

__“Oh.” She knew one word replies were his pet peeve, maybe subconsciously she was trying to piss him off. Maybe she just didn’t care. But she didn’t have time to think about it because before he could reply the X-Ray tech was standing before them, asking for their patient, and Leanne watched as Ethan disappeared behind the curtain to get his daughter._ _

___His daughter._ Those words still sounded so foreign to her. She couldn’t wrap her head around what was happening. Ethan had a child. A small child at that. A daughter. A little girl who wasn’t much older than her daughter had been. She felt like the wind had been knocked out of her and without thinking she walked away. Away from Ethan and Eleanor. Away from Trauma One. Away from the last thing she ever expected to be faced with. His daughter._ _


	2. Some Mommas and Daddies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *This is a short one, so I figured I’d go ahead and post it.

Leanne had wanted to leave Angels all together after the morning that she had had, but she knew that while it was hard, Ellie was still her patient, and she still had to see this one through. She had collected herself quietly, taking a few sips of water and a few deep breaths, before emerging from her office with the best smile she could manage. She made her way upstairs to X-Ray quietly, praying that she didn’t run into anyone on her way, her voice still not quite back yet. Stepping off the elevator she rounded the corner just as Ethan helped the little girl down off the chair, and she offered them both a small smile as she stopped in front of them.

“Is it my turn now?” Ellie’s voice was soft and Leanne could tell that the young girl must have been getting tired, her eye lids looking heavy over her wide eyes.

“Sure is.” Ethan nodded at Leanne as he stepped around her, escorting the girl towards the open door of the X-Ray room. Leanne watched from the hallway as Ethan and the technician told her exactly what to do, and when Ethan pointed out the door, indicating where he would be waiting, Ellie offered him a soft nod in return. 

“I’m sorry I walked away like that.” Leanne’s voice betrayed her as the Colonel joined her just outside the door. She had wanted those words to come out strong, but instead they were quiet, so quiet she almost didn’t hear herself say them. 

“It’s okay.” His voice was just as soft, and if Leanne didn’t know any better she would’ve guessed that he was probably just as stressed as she was. But Ethan didn’t get stressed. And if he did, he surely didn’t show it. “I understand.” 

“I’m glad you told me.” Again, her voice wasn’t cooperating, and she was afraid the man would think she was crazy. “You could’ve easily lied about it.”

Ethan snorted as he dropped to the chair beside her, his head going to his hands for a brief moment before he looked up at her with tired eyes. “I never should’ve hid it in the first place.”

“Ethan…” Leanne wanted to reassure him again that he didn’t owe her an explanation. He didn’t owe her anything. They were friends. Best-friends. But simply friends. And they all had their secrets. There was no reason he needed to share his.

“No Leanne.” He held up his hands as he interrupted her. “Please let me explain.” He stood, bringing himself eye-to-eye with her, and she let out a sigh at the pleading look behind his light gray orbs. “I met Ellie’s mom a little over 6 years ago when I was on leave. I was visiting my step-sister here in LA, we went on a few dates, slept together a few times, and that was it. I went back to Baghdad after a few months and thought nothing of it.” Sighing, he shoved his hands in his pockets. “Then I got a phone call about 7 months later from Mae, telling me that Laura had just given birth.” Leanne let out a sound that wasn’t remotely normal and she smiled inwardly at the look on Ethan’s face. “Yeah, imagine my surprise. I didn’t even know she was pregnant.” He removed his hands from his pockets and rubbed at his eyes again. “I didn’t even meet the kid until I came here to Angels.”

Leanne nodded her head slowly, an understanding setting in. Knowing that this was all new to him too was slightly more comforting. Slightly. “So why did it take you almost four years to come home?” She hoped she wasn’t overstepping a boundary with that question, knowing that this was obviously a fragile topic of discussion. “I know you said your step-sister called, but why did that change things?”

The color drained from Ethan’s face and Leanne feared the worst, backing herself up slightly in case he decided to lose his cool right there in the waiting area. “Mae said she thought Ellie was being abused.”

And Leanne’s heart hit the floor. The blood rushed to her ears and she blinked back rapidly to keep the tears from falling. _Why? Why would someone hurt their own child like that?_ Especially someone as precious as little Ellie.

Ethan must’ve sensed her worry, because he reached out and gently gripped her hand as he continued. “I came home, got a lawyer, and I’ve been fighting ever since to get her out of there.” He squeezed her hand, eyeing her softly as he fought back tears of his own. “It’s been messy Leanne. Real messy. Laura and I…” He hesitated, turning to make sure the door was still closed and that little ears weren’t tuned in. “We don’t get along. At all. She’s fucking crazy. And I know for a fact that she doesn’t give a shit about that kid.” His voice cracked and this time Leanne squeezed his hand in support. “I’m doing the best I can, but I’m struggling.”

Leanne wanted to wrap him in her arms and hold him tight and never let go, but before she could make a move the door behind them opened and Ellie walked out with the young technician, a small smile on her face. 

“All done daddy.” She said softly, cradling her injured hand against her body, and Leanne felt her heart tighten when Ethan choked back a sob and took a deep breath before turning back to the young girl.

“Did you do good?” He asked, bending down so that he was eye to eye with the tot. 

Ellie simply nodded her head and then looked over his shoulder, eyeing Leanne warily. “Am I gonna need a cast?” 

Leanne offered her the best smile she could manage as she walked forward, kneeling down next to Ethan so that she could get a better look at the girl. “I’m going to go look at those X-Rays now and see what they say, okay?”

Nodding her head, the girl turned her attention back to the man in front of her and reached out for a hug, which he graciously returned. Standing, he scooped her up in his arms and eyed Leanne softly. “We’ll wait downstairs.” 

“My office is fine.” She wanted to reach out and hug them both. She just wanted to make all of their pain go away.

Ethan simply nodded his head and turned back toward the elevator, the small child clinging to his neck with closed eyes. Leanne watched as he stepped inside and turned, offering her a sad smile over the child’s shoulder. She did her best to smile back, but she knew she failed when she saw the defeated look in his eyes. A look she was sure was probably mirrored on her face. A look that was definitely being mirrored in both of their hearts.

——

Leanne reviewed Ellie’s X-Rays quickly, the fracture to her radius more than obvious, and she made her way back downstairs just as quickly as she had come up. She paused outside of her office door, hoping to gather the strength she needed to face the father and daughter on the other side. Knocking softly, she waited for an answer before opening the door, not wanting to interrupt them.

“Come in.” Ethan’s voice was barely audible and she could hear the exhaustion dripping in his words. She opened the door gently and stepped inside, eyeing him warily as she closed the door behind her.

“Well Ellie, it’s definitely broken.” She held up the X-Ray and pointed to the noticeable fracture on the girl’s wrist. “Looks like you’re gonna get that cast.”

Ellie nodded her head and eyed the picture with wide eyes. “Can I keep that?” She pointed up at the object in Leanne’s hands, shifting her gaze toward the woman with a small smile.

Leanne and Ethan both chuckled lightly at the girl’s inquiry and it felt good to finally not feel so sad about something. Offering her a smile, Leanne extended the hand that was holding the girl’s X-Ray toward her, chuckling when a little hand grabbed it gently and held it up in front of her face with a big smile. “Thanks!”

“You’re welcome.” Her voice was soft and Leanne found herself falling in love with the girl with every second she spent around her. Much like she had with her father. “I’m gonna get you to come back out to a bed so that we can get that cast on.”

Ellie simply nodded, handing her new piece of artwork to the man beside her. “I’ll be right back daddy.” She hopped up, her eyes turning upward toward Leanne, a curious smile on her face. “Can I get a pink cast?”

Leanne nodded her head gently and offered the girl a smile in return. “I think we can make that happen.” And with that she took the girl’s good hand in hers and walked her out of the office, leaving Ethan alone, his eyes staring them down from behind them.


	3. An Invitation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Here we have Ethan being vulnerable, Leanne being a sweetheart, and Ellie being downright adorable. This is probably one of my favorite chapters so I hope you guys enjoy!

The rest of the afternoon and night had been a bit of a blur for Leanne, her mind often wandering off to the good Colonel and his daughter. After she had gotten Ellie situated with a cast Ethan had left with the young girl, stating that he was going to take her home himself so that he could have a talk with the girl’s mother. Leanne had recognized the look in Ethan’s eyes all to well, and she knew that there was a chance that said talk could get ugly. She had squeezed his hand gently and told him to call her for anything, before offering Ellie a gentle hug and the same words of advice. 

She had struggled to get through the rest of her shift, and she had checked her phone constantly just in case one of them needed her, but it never rang. After her time was up and she was finally free of the confines of the large hospital she had gone home and showered quickly, before falling asleep in her robe, still on top of the covers. When she awoke the next afternoon, there was a new text message on her phone, but it wasn’t from the person she was hoping.

_‘Ethan’s sick. Said he won’t be in tonight. I’m gonna need you a little earlier than normal.’_ Will’s words glared up at her and she felt her heart sank. Ethan couldn’t be sick. He was fine last night when he left with Ellie. And then it hit her. Ellie.

_Please dear god don’t say something had happened to Ellie._ She panicked in that moment, jumping up off the bed and throwing on the closest half-way decent outfit she could find. She grabbed her phone and raced downstairs, sliding her feet into a pair of old flip-flops, she grabbed her car keys and raced outside. She had started the car and thrown it in reverse before she realized that she didn’t even know where Ethan lived. Surely he wasn’t still living in that small apartment he had started out in. Not with Ellie in the picture. Not knowing what else to do she opened her phone and dialed the number of the one person that she knew would know how to find the man.

“Hello?” Noa’s voice was quiet over the line and Leanne realized that she had probably just woken the younger woman up.

“Noa, I need Dr. Willis’ address.” Her voice was harsher than she was hoping for, and she felt bad for almost yelling at the resident.

Noa sighed on the other end and Leanne had a feeling that she already knew just why she was panicking. “I’ll text you.”

“Thank you.” Leanne let out a sigh of relief and eyed the phone suspiciously when Noa hung up without another word. She waited a good minute before the text popped up on her screen, an address staring back up at her. She quickly shot the girl another ‘thank you’, before copying the information and entering it in her GPS. The directions said it was ten minutes away. Leanne thought that those might be the longest ten minutes of her life.

——

There had been little traffic and Leanne had arrived at her destination with two minutes to spare. Pulling her car into the driveway behind Ethan’s Jeep, she eyed the small house in front of her curiously. It was definitely not what she had pictured. 

The house was small, much smaller than hers, and it was only one story. There was a big picture window to one side, a small porch sitting under it. The siding was old and it looked like it was several years beyond needing to be replaced. There were several small bushes in the flower bed’s out front, and Leanne chuckled when she noticed the lone garden gnome sporting his LA Dodgers jersey tucked amongst the weeds. 

She put the car in park and took a deep breath before undoing her belt and opening her door. Stepping out of the car she ran a shaky hand through her hair and quietly made her way up the walk. As she got closer, she could see the small chalk drawings on the side walk. A few flowers, a mismatched scribbling of ‘Ellie’ in various colors, a small hopscotch game that was obviously drawn by someone other than the six year old. She smiled to herself at the image of Ethan drawing that for his daughter. The thought that he had then probably also played it with her coming to mind. She got ready to reach up and ring the bell when the door opened quietly in front of her.

“She’s asleep.” Ethan’s voice was soft, and he stepped outside onto the porch, pulling the screen door closed behind him. He was dressed in jeans and a Dodgers t-shirt, his feet bare and his hair resembling that of someone who had gotten lost in a wind storm. His eyes were tired and the scruff on his face indicated that he probably hadn’t showered yet. 

“Oh.” Leanne stopped in her tracks and placed her hands in her pockets as she eyed the man in front of her curiously. “I’m sorry for just dropping by like this.”

“It’s okay.” Ethan shifted on his feet and sighed. “I meant to text you last night but I didn’t want to wake you.”

Nodding her head Leanne swallowed. _So something had happened last night._ The wheels in her head were turning faster than Leanne thought possible. _Had he not returned Ellie to her mother’s house like he was supposed to? Had something gone down during his drop-off? Had something happened to Ellie?_

“I took her home after we left Angels.” Ethan was already answering her questions and she hadn’t even gotten the words out yet. _Damn he was good._ “I waited for Laura to get home. She didn’t show up until almost 2:00am.” He sighed, leaning his head back as he gathered his thoughts. “She didn’t understand why I didn’t just leave Ellie and go. She wanted me to just leave our six year old home alone all night.” He started to pace back and forth on the small porch and Leanne wanted to reach out and hold him. “I lost it. We started screaming at each other. She started yelling about how I was spoiling Ellie. How I was treating her like a child.” He laughed a scary laugh at that and Leanne could see the tortuous humor in his eyes. “I reminded her that she was a child and then she started screaming about how useless she was. My child Leanne.” He waved his hands in her direction and Leanne took a step forward, moving a little closer to the man in front of her who was so close to losing his cool. “She said that my child was an inconvenience and that she didn’t love her and that she never wanted her.” He took a deep breath and stopped his pacing, his body standing directly in front of her on the porch, his hands shaking as he dropped them to his sides. “And then Ellie came out of her room and she said that she wanted to go with me and that she didn’t like it there anymore. That sent Laura off man. I’ve never seen her like that. She just, she lost it.” Ethan ran his hands over his face, brushing the tears back as best he could. “She hit her. Right there in front of me. Slapped her. Told her she hated her.”

The gasp that left Leanne’s mouth was louder than she thought, and she brought her hands to her face, covering up her sobs as she felt the tears pour from her eyes. _That poor child. That poor, sweet, innocent child._ She couldn’t believe it. She couldn’t understand how anyone could say those things about a little girl. How anyone could lay their hands on something so precious. 

“I couldn’t do it. I scooped Ellie up and we left. I told Laura if she even tried to follow me I’d kill her.” The words left Ethan’s mouth before Leanne could wrap her head around them and she snapped her eyes up to meet his. “I threatened to kill the mother of my child Leanne. What kind of monster am I?”

Leanne reached out for him, choking back a sob when he stepped into her open arms, wrapping her tightly in a hug. He buried his face against her neck, his tears warm against her cool skin, and she pulled him as close as she could. Running one hand through his hair, she closed her eyes and rested her head against his. They stood that way for a minutes, both of them crying while simultaneously trying to comfort the other. Ethan was the first one to pull back and he eyed Leanne through tear filled eyes, his forehead resting against hers. 

“I didn’t know what else to do Leanne.” His voice broke Leanne’s heart in two and she grasped his cheeks in the palms of her hands as she closed her eyes, bringing his forehead down so that she could place a kiss to it.

“You did the right thing Ethan.” She whispered against his skin. “She should be with someone who loves her.”

Ethan choked back another sob as he pulled away from her and he got ready to speak when they both heard the pitter patter of little feet coming down the hallway. Reaching up, Ethan quickly wiped the tears from his eyes and took a deep breath, turning toward the door just as a set of sleepy gray eyes peered through at them.

“Daddy?” The little voice was soft and Leanne watched as she reached up to open the screen door with her right hand, her left arm clutching a small stuffed animal to her chest. 

“Hi baby.” Ethan’s voice was soft, and when he knelt down in front of the girl her face lit up as she caught sight of the woman standing behind him.

“Leanne!” Her voice was excited, and the exact opposite of what Leanne expected, but it tugged at her heart strings all the same.

“Hi Ellie.” Her reply was soft, and she prayed that the little girl couldn’t tell that she had just been balling her eyes out. “How are you feeling?” 

The little girl eyed the cast on her arm quickly before shifting her eyes back up to hers and she smiled. “Better. Daddy let me eat ice cream for breakfast and watch TV in bed.”

Leanne let out a soft chuckle as she eyed Ethan softly, a smile gracing his face at the excitement in his daughter’s words. “Of course he did.” 

“Can Leanne stay for dinner daddy?” The next words that left her mouth sent Leanne’s head for a spin and she snapped her eyes back to Ethan’s quickly.

“Umm Honey, that’s not…” Ethan didn’t know how to respond without breaking the girl’s heart and Leanne could tell he was struggling with finding a solution that would work for them all. She offered him a smile as she knelt down in front of the girl.

“I can’t tonight sweetie. I have to get to work.” She saw the girl’s smile fade and she felt horrible for letting her down. “But how about we have dinner some other night? Say, Friday?” The smile returned to the girl’s face at Leanne’s question and she quickly turned her head toward her father.

“Can we daddy? Pleeeaaasee?” She dragged out her plea in a way that Ethan was known for doing and Leanne almost melted, the small girl’s gray eyes echoing those of her father’s a million times over.

Ethan let out a chuckle, whether it was because he realized just how much the sweet girl looked and sounded like him or not, Leanne didn’t know, but it was a soft laugh that made her smile. “We’ll see.”

That answer seemed to suffice the child and she threw her arms gently around Leanne’s neck, squeezing tightly before pulling back to eye her seriously. “Friday night. Six o’clock. Daddy will make lasagna.” She pointed the finger of her stuffed animal toting hand at Leanne. “Don’t be late.” And with that she retreated back inside, her bare feet thundering down the hall as she made her way back toward wherever she had come from.

Standing, Leanne eyed Ethan curiously, his smile betraying the annoyance in his eyes. “I guess I’ll be seeing you on Friday then?”

Ethan chuckled and rose to stand next to her. “Six o’clock work?”

“I’ll make sure of it.” She offered him a smile and she blushed slightly when he looked back at her longingly. She had always imagined that those eyes would one day look at her like that. She could never have imagined that it would eventually happen all because of a six year old with a hankering for lasagna.


	4. You Are My Sunshine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Have your tissues ready, this chapter is a rough one. But first there’s some Ellie being an adorable little mess. And some Daddy!Ethan to the rescue.

Ethan had spent the rest of the evening trying to calm poor Ellie down after she realized that Friday was still two whole days away. After much convincing, and an extra 30 minutes of TV, the poor girl had finally settled down and agreed that she could wait to see Leanne. That was until Ethan put dinner on the table an hour later and Ellie started to cry again.

“Baby what’s wrong?” Ethan didn’t understand how his six year old was this emotional over macaroni and cheese. He was new at this whole full-time father thing, but he figured that this was even a little over the top.

“I want Leanne!” Her voice was whiny and it made Ethan’s ears hurt.

Letting out a sigh, Ethan sat down next to the girl at the table and offered her his best smile. “She had to go back to work sweetie. You’ll see her in a few days.”

Apparently that had been the wrong choice of words because she started to cry even more, her arms and head falling to the table dramatically, narrowly missing her glass of chocolate milk. “I don’t wanna wait for Friday!” She wailed, and Ethan couldn’t help the smile that came over his face at his child’s performance. Mae did say the child was a drama queen. _I wonder where she gets it from._

“Ellie, honey, look at me.” Ethan gently lifted the girl’s chin up with two fingers, bringing their gray eyes together. “What’s really going on princess?”

She let out a soft sigh and Ethan smiled at her gently. “I don’t know daddy.” Her voice was so quiet that Ethan barely heard it, but his heart twisted all the same. The poor child had been through hell the past two days and he hadn’t even stopped to think about what was running through her head.

“Are you tired?” She nodded her head as she looked up at him sadly. “Does your arm hurt?” Another nod, followed by a sniffle. “Do you miss your mama?” This time she shook her head back and forth and offered Ethan a frown. 

“I don’t miss her daddy. Not one bit.” And with that, she threw her arms around his neck and buried her face against his shoulder. Ethan could feel the girl’s tears against his shirt and he sighed softly as he wrapped his arms around her tightly. “I don’t ever wanna go back there.” She said quietly, tightening her hold.

“I know angel.” Ethan pressed a soft kiss to her head as he leaned back in his chair, squeezing her tightly in his arms.

And in that moment, Ethan swore that he would do whatever it took to keep that girl with him for as long as he could. Ever since he had gotten back from Baghdad he had been fighting to get her away from that crazy mother of hers, and now that he had her, he wasn’t going to give up fighting. He knew she was better off with him, that her life would improve greatly if she were allowed to stay with him. He knew that was what she needed, and he would be damned if anyone was going to keep him from giving his daughter the best life possible. 

“I love you daddy.” Her voice was so soft that it made Ethan tear up, and when she pulled back and looked up at him with those big, gray eyes, ones that mirrored his perfectly, he choked back a sob.

“I love you too Ellie.” He whispered back, reaching up to wipe the tears from her little cheek.

—

It had taken Ethan another 20 minutes to convince the girl to eat her dinner. And then another hour to get her to take a bath. And putting pajamas on? Well that had been a battle that Ethan hadn’t even bothered with, declaring that as long as she had underwear on she was good to go. He had then tried to tuck her into bed, but she had demanded three stories, two different glasses of water, and two wardrobe changes. Ethan had finally drawn the line when she demanded that he sing for her. Ethan didn’t sing. _Not even for his daughter._

But then she cried for forty-five minutes because she needed to hear a song, so Ethan had given in. And he sang. _Horribly he might add_. But he sang. And then he tucked her into bed with her stuffed unicorn under her arm and a kiss to her forehead and he had retreated into his office to try and get some work done. That had been three hours ago and Ellie had gotten out of a bed at least half a dozen times since then. All with the same question. And upset every time Ethan answered her with the same response.

“Daddy...” Ethan heard the little girl’s voice sing song from the other room, and even though he already knew what she was going to ask him, he set down his pen and shouted back.

“Yes baby?” He heard the sound of her little feet hit the floor boards as she got out of bed for what was probably the tenth time that evening.

“Is it Friday yet?” He saw gray eyes peer at him from around the door frame of his office and he sighed, she looked downright exhausted and he didn’t understand why she was fighting sleep so much.

“No baby. It’s not Friday yet.” He pointed to the calendar across from him, hanging at the perfect height for her little hands to reach. “You still have two more days.”

She let out a sigh and rolled her eyes at him, her right hand going to her hip. “But I want Friday to get here.” 

Ethan couldn’t help but let out a chuckle as she stuck out her bottom lip and slouched against the door frame. “Try going to bed.” He offered her a small smile but she didn’t return it, instead she eyed him sternly from under her messy bangs. “It’ll get here faster if you just go to sleep.”

She huffed again and crossed her arms over her chest. “I wanna see Leanne again.”

Ethan let out a sigh himself and hung his head. _This is exactly why he didn’t want Leanne involved_. “Well baby you’re just gonna have to wait.”

“But I don’t wanna wait!” She stomped her little foot and started to cry. Shaking his head Ethan reached out his arms to her, eyeing her softly as she climbed into his lap willingly. “I miss her daddy.”

Ethan let out a soft chuckle as he pressed a kiss to the crown of her head. “I know sweetie.”

“Can I call her? Please? I wanna say goodnight.” Her voice was so soft and pleading that Ethan wanted to give in. He really did. But then he looked at the clock on the wall and sighed.

“She’s working baby. She might not answer.” He reached for his phone and showed Ellie the time on it, but the girl didn’t seem phased.

“Can we at least try?” She batted her eyelashes at him and Ethan knew he was a goner. “Pleeaasseee…”

Ethan let out a chuckle and slid his phone open. “Fine. But if she doesn’t answer you have to try and get some sleep okay?” 

She nodded her head excitedly and watched with wide eyes as he opened his recent calls and clicked on Leanne’s name gently. Pressing the button for speaker phone he held it up in front of her tiny face and watched as her eyes widened when a soft voice came over the phone.

“Ethan?” Leanne sounded as tired as he felt and he wished she hadn’t had to work again tonight.

“Hey.” He replied quietly, eyeing Ellie as he placed one finger over his lips, indicating for her to wait before speaking.

“Is everything okay?” She sounded worried and Ethan knew she was probably thinking the worst if he was calling her at work.

“Yeah.” He let out a soft chuckle as Ellie’s face lit up with excitement. “Someone’s having a hard time going to bed without saying goodnight to their favorite doctor.”

Leanne’s soft chuckle made his heart flutter and he wished more than anything that she was here with them. “Hi Ellie.” Her voice was soft and sweet and full of love, and Ethan’s heart grew ten sizes at the smile that crossed his daughter’s face at the woman’s words.

“Hi Leanne!” Ellie’s voice was full of excitement and she almost fell out of Ethan’s lap from clapping so hard. “I miss you!” 

Another chuckle and Ethan smiled, offering his daughter a nod. “I miss you too sweetie.” She let out a soft sigh on the other end and Ethan could here her moving around. “Why can’t you sleep?”

“I wanted to see you.” The soft sound that left his daughter’s mouth broke his heart and he ran his free hand up and down her back. “Friday’s too far away.”

“Oh Ellie.” Leanne’s voice mirrored Ellie’s sadness and Ethan felt his heart clench for the both of them. “I promise it’ll be here before you know it.”

“I know.” The girl let out a sigh and Ethan stroked her cheek gently when she hung her head. “I just wanted to say goodnight.”

Ethan could almost hear the smile on Leanne’s face and he pressed a kiss to the girl’s head. “Goodnight sweet Ellie.” This time, Ellie didn’t hold back her yawn and he was hopeful that Leanne’s words were enough to soothe her. “Why don’t you try and sleep love? It’ll make Friday get here sooner.”

Ellie nodded her head and eyed Ethan sleepily. “Okay. Goodnight Leanne.” Her words were soft and she leaned forward, her head falling to Ethan’s chest with a contended sigh. 

Taking the phone off speaker, Ethan wrapped his free arm around his daughter tightly, his legs going up on his desk to support her weight, which was now fully against him. He brought the phone to his ear with his free hand and let out a sigh. “I’m sorry about that.” He said softly, his eyes closing and his head falling back against the chair. “It’s been a night.”

Leanne let out a soft chuckle and he heard her move again. “Yeah. Tell me about it.”

There was silence for a few moments and Ethan was thankful that it wasn’t awkward, especially given the circumstances. “She cried over macaroni and cheese.” He heard Leanne let out a laugh, a real laugh, and he was proud of himself for giving her some comedic relief. “And then she refused to put pants on.” Again, another laugh, and he could just imagine her beautiful face all lit up. “Then she made me sing.”

“Sing?” Leanne’s voice was full of humor and he chuckled.

“Yeah sing.” He looked down at the object of their discussion, smiling softly when he noticed that the girl had finally drifted off, her arms tucked lightly under her body, a soft expression gracing her little face.

“What song?” Her voice was so soft that it gave Ethan goose bumps and he knew he shouldn’t be feeling like this about her right now. Not with everything that was going on. Not with his daughter asleep in his arms.

“You Are My Sunshine.” His reply was just as soft as her question and he brushed some of Ellie’s hair back with his hand, her small whimper startling him.

Leanne didn’t respond and Ethan thought that maybe they’d been disconnected. It had happened before. Angels Memorial didn’t exactly have the best reception, especially if she was hiding somewhere like he suspected. He heard what he thought was a sob, but then her soft voice came over the line once again and her words shattered his heart in two.

“That was Caitlin’s favorite song.” _A dagger to his heart was more like it._

“Leanne…” He let out a sigh but she cut him off before he could continue.

“I have to go.” And with that she hung up. No ‘goodbye’. No ‘it’s okay’. No nothing. Just silence on the other end. And Ethan felt like the biggest asshole in the world.

He didn’t know much about Leanne’s daughter, or her son either, for that matter. But he knew enough to know that she was roughly the same age as Ellie when she passed. And that thought alone simply brought tears to his eyes. He couldn’t imagine what she had been through, all the pain that she must have felt. And he couldn’t imagine how seeing Ellie was affecting her. He was stupid to bring her around. He should’ve talked to her first. Brought the idea up slowly. But instead, he had just thrown his daughter in her face. He was teasing her. And he deserved to be punished for being such a jerk.

Leanne was his best friend and while he thought the feeling was relatively mutual, he doubted that she would return those sentiments now that he had reopened all her old wounds. He hated himself. Really, truly hated himself. 

Ellie whimpered again in her sleep, her little hands balling into fists against his gray sweatshirt and he dropped a kiss to her head. “Shhh angel. You’re okay.” He hoped his words were enough to soothe whatever was plaguing her dreams, and when she settled back down against him he let out a soft sigh. Standing gently, he cradled her against his chest as he pocketed his phone and made his way out of the room. 

His original plan had been to drop Ellie off in her room before retreating into the kitchen for a beer, but now he just wanted to hold his daughter tight and try to forget about how much he may have just ruined his friendship with Leanne. Placing the young girl lightly into his king size bed, he quietly made his way into the small bathroom, forgoing a shower and just changing straight into his sweat pants. When he returned to the room, Ellie had curled herself up against his pillows, and he smiled at the sight of the small girl laying long ways in the big bed. He climbed in beside her and tucked her sleeping body against his, dropping another kiss to her forehead as he let his body relax against the pillows. 

He grabbed his phone off the night stand an eyed it curiously, debating if he should try and call Leanne again or not. He opted for a text instead, figuring that would be an easier rejection to handle than her ignoring his call, or worse, hanging up on him again.

_I’m sorry for earlier Lea. I didn’t mean to upset you._ He hit send and closed his eyes for a second, only to reopen them and type another message. _I can only imagine how difficult this must be for you and I realize I’m not making it any easier. I understand if you want out. I get it. Just please don’t hate me._ He hit send before tossing his phone onto the nightstand next to him, letting his free arm drop to his stomach as he adjusted the covers around them. Several minutes passed and Ethan was almost asleep when he heard a buzz from beside him. Reaching for the phone he brought it toward him and sighed softly when he saw Leanne’s name on the screen. He swiped open the message and let out a breath at her words.

_I don’t hate you._ Stared back up at him and he felt a sense of relief wash over him.

_Good. Because I don’t know what I’d do without my best-friend._ He hit send and waited with bated breath for a response. But he never got one. Twenty minutes went by with him just eyeing his phone anxiously. But no text came. Dropping his phone back onto the nightstand he growled lightly and dropped his hand over his eyes. Willing back the tears of frustration that were threatening to fall. 

He couldn’t believe how fucked up this had all become. _And in a matter of hours too_. They had been fine two days ago. They had been fine last night. Hell, they had been fine when she had left his house 7 hours ago. And yet, now. Now they were nothing.


	5. Friday Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *I know, I know, two posts in one day?! I’m crazy right?! Anyway, I’m trying to get this finished up before the premier, so there might a few days where I post more than one chapter. This is one of those lucky days.
> 
> **Here we have our little trio being just downright freaking adorable with each other. I hope you guys enjoy!

The next two days had gone roughly the same as that one and Ethan was slowly losing his mind. As much as he was loving being a full time father. And as much as he was loving that Ellie was finally happy again. He was not loving the fact that his daughter was currently crying on the couch, literally, over a cup of spilled milk. 

“Ellie, baby, what’s wrong?” Ethan felt like he probably asked that question a hundred times a day and how the little girl wasn’t tired of hearing it yet he didn’t know.

“I spilled my drink daddy.” Her voice sounded so defeated and Ethan didn’t know what he could possibly do to make this any better.

“I know honey.” He held up the paper towels in his hand and made his way into the living room with a sigh. “We can clean it up. It’s okay.”

Ellie let out an exasperated sigh and fell back against the couch cushions with a wail. “It was an accident!”

And then it hit him. _Like a mother fucking freight train_. She was afraid of him. Or rather, she was afraid of what he would do to her. And his heart shattered into a thousand tiny pieces. Kneeling down in front of her, spilled milk forgotten, he pulled her into his arms tightly.

“Ellie honey it’s okay.” He whispered the soothing words against her head and pressed kiss after kiss to the loose brown waves. “I know it was an accident baby. But it’s okay. We can clean it up.” He felt her sob against his shoulder and he pulled her tighter, tears of his own falling against her cheek. “Shhhh baby it’s okay.” He held her for a few minutes as her sobs continued and when she finally seemed to be calming down he pulled back and eyed her softly.

Wiping a hand across her face she sniffled, her casted arm reaching up to toy with the chain of his exposed dog tags. “I’m sorry daddy.”

Ethan offered her his best smile and ran his thumb along her cheek. “It’s okay Ellie.” He whispered softly, setting himself back on his heels. “Let’s clean it up okay?”

She nodded her little head and reached out for the paper towels still tucked in his hand. He released them gently and watched as the girl gently cleaned up her spill off of the table. She stood on her own and moved to deposit the towels in the trash can, sniffling along the way. Ethan stood up, only to turn and plop himself down on the couch, smiling when the girl climbed up next to him, snuggling into his side with a yawn. “Why don’t we go out for a bit peanut? I think we could both use some fresh air.”

Nodding her head gently, Ellie eyed him curiously from beside him. “Can we go to the park?”

“Of course we can.” His words were soft, but the smile that came across the girl’s face was anything but. “Why don’t you go potty and put on some shoes?”

She jumped up excitedly and bounded down the hall with a chorus of ‘We’re going to the park. We’re going to the park!’ echoing behind her. Ethan let out a soft chuckle and moved to stand when he heard his phone go off from its spot on the kitchen counter. Opening it without checking to see who it was he couldn’t help but smile when he saw Leanne’s words staring up at him.

_How’s Ellie?_ He was glad to know that even if she was pissed off at him she was at least keeping the peace with his young daughter.

_She’s okay. Struggling. But she’s okay._ He could still hear the girl singing her song as she washed her hands and he shook his head slightly, smiling at the thought that something as simple as going to the park had just made his daughter’s day. _We’re getting ready to go to the park. Wanna come?_ He knew it was a stretch. She was mad at him after all. But he hoped that she would at least come for Ellie’s sake.

_I’m at the grocery store right now._ And his heart sank. But then another message popped up before he could reply. _Can I meet you there in 30?_ And his heart filled back up again.

_Please do._ He smiled as Ellie came skipping down the hallway, having opted for her silver slip-on shoes that Noa had bought her, a giant smile on her face. 

_See you then :)_ He looked back down when his phone dinged once more and he chuckled, Leanne’s use of emojis still not something he was on good terms with.

“You ready pumpkin?” He moved himself around the counter, grabbing both of their water bottles from the fridge before shutting the door and making his way into the living room.

“Super ready!” She pumped her fist in the air and Ethan laughed at the sight. This girl sure was a mess. His mess.

“Come on.” He grabbed his keys and walked her outside, shutting the door behind them and locking it gently. He opened the door for her and watched as she climbed inside all on her own, buckling her seat belt and looking back at him with a smile. “I have a surprise for you too.”

She eyed him curiously as he shut the back door and climbed into the driver’s seat, giving her a wink in the review mirror. “Is it a good surprise?”

“I think so.” He put the Jeep in reverse and offered her one last smile before backing out onto the street. They drove in relative silence the rest of the way, both lost in their own thoughts, and when they pulled up in front of the empty playground Ellie offered Ethan a giant smile.

“I have it all to myself!” She shouted excitedly, undoing her seat belt before Ethan had even taken the key out of the ignition.

“Looks that way angel.” He exited the vehicle with a smile, opening his daughter’s door before he had even closed his, and when she bounced down to stand next to him he couldn’t help but chuckle. “Still gotta stay close though, understand?” 

“Yes sir!” She took his hand gently with her left one, reaching up to take her water bottle with her right, eyeing Ethan anxiously as he grabbed his sunglasses, placing them over his eyes with a soft smile. “Come on daddy!” She tugged his hand and all but dragged him away from the car, heading straight for the giant swing set.

Ellie swung for what felt like hours before Ethan finally convinced her that his arms were too tired for ‘higher daddy, higher!’. She had giggled when he reminded her that he was an old man and then took off for the jungle gym, climbing the rock wall with ease despite the pink cast covering her wrist. Ethan found a bench that allowed him full view of her playing area and plopped himself down, checking the time on his phone. He had texted Leanne the address for the park as soon as they had stopped and he was anxiously awaiting to see if she was actually going to show up or not. He was lost in his thoughts when he heard a car door shut and an excited squeal from his daughter answered all his questions.

“Leanne!” Ethan watched as the young girl came flying down the slide, running as fast as her little legs would carry her, and right into the open arms of his best-friend.

“Hi Ellie!” Leanne’s voice was soft but full of excitement, and she scooped the little girl up with ease. “How are you?”

“I’m good!” Ellie pulled back and placed her hands on Leanne’s cheeks with a smile. “But I’m better now!”

The smile that crossed Leanne’s face was downright adorable, and Ethan couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight as he stood, making his way towards them quietly.

“That’s good to know.” Ellie wriggled herself free from Leanne’s grasp and ran back to the structure with a shout of ‘watch me’ before she took off down the slide again. Leanne offered her a thumbs up and Ethan came to stand next to her and he couldn’t help but smile at the sight of his daughter finally happy again.

“Hi.” His voice was soft and he offered Leanne his best smile when she turned to face him.

“Hi.” The quietness in her tone told him that they weren’t back on track yet, but he was just thankful to see her smiling face, so he would settle for that. He thought she looked beautiful standing there in the mid-afternoon glow. She wore jeans and a t-shirt, her hair in a loose braid behind her head, her feet clad in a simple pair of tennis shoes. He was sure that she probably couldn’t look any prettier, except for maybe naked, and he shook his head at the thought. _He didn’t need to go there._

“Daddy?!” A small voice interrupted his thoughts and he snapped his head up to eye his daughter softly.

“Yes baby?” He watched as Leanne shifted next to him and he wondered if she was as uncomfortable as he was in that exact moment.

“Can we go for a walk? I wanna see the duckies.” The smile on her face would’ve gotten her anything she wanted and Ethan figured if she wanted to go see ducks, well dammit, they’d go see the ducks.

“Sure.” He turned toward Leanne and offered her a small smile, raising an eyebrow at her as he spoke. “A walk sound okay?” She simply nodded her head and he returned his gaze back to the little girl. “Alright love, let’s go for a walk!”

Ellie jumped up and down before racing down the slide, running to stand between them. She grabbed each of their hands in her own, and tugged them in the direction of the walking trail with a smile. Ethan tightened his grip around her little fingers and he smiled when he noticed Leanne do the same. The girl’s smile grew ten fold and he could only imagine how happy she must be feeling in that moment. They walked along in silence for a few minutes, slowing down as they neared the small pond at the bottom of the hill. Ellie dropped both of their hands and looked up at Ethan curiously.

“Can I go closer?” Her voice held all the hesitation Ethan expected, and then some.

“Of course. But don’t go beyond the fence okay?” He pointed to the small fence that lined what he assumed was the ‘safe zone’ for the pond, and probably for the ducks too, and she shook her head in understanding. Ethan watched as she made her way closer, laughing when one of the geese honked at another, chasing it around the small body of water.

“How’s she holding up?” Leanne’s voice was quiet and he almost forget that she was there for a second, but then he turned to look at her and she was eyeing him softly, and his world stopped for a split second.

“She’s um…” He ran his hand through his hair with a sigh. He wanted to be honest with Leanne. He wanted to tell her about the not sleeping and the crying over little things and the fact that she was begging for her in the middle of the night. But then he remembered how hard she had taken him telling her about the singing, and he opted to not upset her with a problem that wasn’t hers to begin with. “She’s, adjusting.”

“You don’t sound so convinced.” Her voice was soft and he watched as she eyed his daughter with gentle eyes, a small smile gracing her face when she watched Ellie giggle at the still honking goose.

“We’ve um…” He sighed again, and turned toward her, his gray eyes meeting her brown, and he let out a breath as he fought back the tears. “We’ve hit some road blocks.”

Leanne nodded softly, her hand going out to squeeze his gently, offering him a gentle gaze. “She’s gonna need time Ethan. This is all new to her. It’s new to you too, remember?”

Ethan nodded his head and squeezed her hand in response, tugging her closer to him. “I need you Leanne.” His words came out sounding much more desperate than he intended and he sighed at the shocked look on her face. “I don’t know who else to turn to. I mean, Rollie’s trying, and so is Noa, but neither one of them know me like you do. They don’t get me.” He tugged her even closer and he sighed when she pulled her hand free from his, standing her ground a few feet away from him.

“Ethan you can’t just expect me to drop everything…” But Leanne didn’t get to finish her words before Ethan’s phone rang in his pocket. She let out a sigh and turned her attention back to the little girl, putting a few more feet between them.

Ethan ran his hand through his hair as he answered his phone, stepping away when he realized it was his lawyer calling. He watched with sad eyes as Leanne made her way toward the small girl, kneeling down next to her with a smile, laughing softly at whatever the tot said to her. He mumbled back his responses to the woman on the other end, only half understanding what was being said. But then she said that she needed to meet with him immediately and that it had to be done before end of business hours today. Which meant, in the next 30 minutes. Which meant he was about to ruin his daughter’s already crappy day. He agreed to the meeting and hung up with a huff, sighing as he placed his phone back in his pocket.

“Hey Ellie…” He called the girl’s name softly, putting on his best smile as she turned toward him. “We gotta go baby.”

He watched as the smile faded from her face and her shoulders slumped as her head fell forward with a soft sigh. “Okay.” She started making her way toward him and Ethan felt his heart breaking. He couldn’t believe he had to be the bad guy here.

“Everything okay?” Leanne’s voice was soft, her hand going out to take Ellie’s trembling hand in hers.

“That was my lawyer.” He eyed Ellie softly but when she didn’t look up he lifted his eyes to meet Leanne’s. “She needs to meet with me immediately. Said it’s important.”

Leanne nodded her head at his words and turned her eyes back toward the girl in front of him. “I can take her if you want Ethan.”

Ethan watched as Ellie’s head snapped up, eyeing Leanne hopefully through watery eyes. She turned her head toward him then. “Daddy?”

He knew he should say ‘no’. He knew he shouldn’t dump his child on Leanne like that. That that would be the definition of taking advantage of her. But his daughter’s eyes were glimmering with hope and he knew that Leanne wouldn’t have asked if it weren’t okay, so he nodded his head softly. “If it’s okay with Leanne baby, that’s fine with me.”

Ellie turned her head back toward Leanne and offered her the best puppy dog eyes she could manage, and he laughed softly. “Pleeeeaaase Leanne?!”

Leanne chuckled, reaching out to wipe the tears from the little girl’s face with her thumb. “That’s fine with me.”

Ethan smiled as Ellie threw her arm’s around the woman’s waist and he mouthed a ‘thank you’ to her as she scooped the girl into her arms. He gestured for them to lead the way back down the trail and he followed behind them quietly. When they got back to their cars Ethan quickly buckled Ellie into her car seat and shut the door to give them some privacy.

“Just follow us to the house?” His voice was unsteady and he knew he was nervous at how this would change things for them. “I’ll let you guys in and then be on my way.”

Nodding her head Leanne started toward her car, but Ethan stopped her, grabbing her hand gently in his own and pulling her to his chest. He wanted to hug her. He wanted to kiss her and thank her and tell her that she was the most amazing thing in the world. But her hand went to his chest and she planted her feet against the ground and she eyed him sternly. “Not now Ethan.” And with that she pulled free of his grasp and headed toward her car, slamming her door shut behind her.

Sighing, Ethan dropped his head and climbed into the driver’s seat. He eyed Ellie through the rear view, but she had closed her eyes and was resting her head against the seat, for which he was thankful. He pulled out of the parking space with a sigh and watched as Leanne followed behind him slowly. He wondered if this was all a giant mistake.


	6. Ellie and Leanne

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Here we have Leanne and Ellie being adorable, together. And Ethan being a hot mess, as always.
> 
> **Also, this is a long chapter, so it’ll be the only one today, but I promise you it’s worth it :)

Leanne followed Ethan back to the small house, her mind reeling with the decision that she had just made. She couldn’t believe that she had offered to watch Ellie. Actually, she could. She could totally believe it. Because whether she wanted to admitted it or not, she was totally smitten. And not just with the little girl, but also with her father. _And she felt herself falling, fast._

She was nervous. Nervous of how this would affect her friendship with Ethan. Nervous of how this would affect her. But now, more than anything, she was nervous about her feelings towards the little girl. She’d be lying if she said that she didn’t already love her. A lot. Everything about her reminded her so much of Caitlin. And as much as it was breaking her heart to watch this child the way she used to watch her own, it was also a relief of some sorts. She felt like she was finally getting a second chance. Like she was finally getting to start her life over. Something that she had always dreamt of, but had never thought possible.

She was brought out of her thoughts when the car in front of her pulled into the driveway of Ethan’s house. She sighed to herself as she pulled her car in next to his Jeep, turning off the ignition and running her hands through her hair before exiting. She could do this, she really could. Ethan needed her. And more so, Ellie needed her. And she needed them, whether she wanted to admit it or not.

“Daddy!” Leanne heard the little girl’s voice before she saw her, and she watched as Ethan helped her out of her car seat to stand beside the Jeep.

“What baby?” She watched as Ethan pulled his house key out and made his way toward the door, the small girl trailing behind him, bopping her head back and forth as she went.

“Can Leanne and I order pizza for dinner?” Her voice was soft and the eyes that she looked up at them both with were wide.

“If that’s okay with Leanne.” He opened the door and gestured for them both to enter before him. “It’s up to you guys.” 

Seeming satisfied with her father’s response Ellie reached up to take Leanne’s hand in hers. “Come on Leanne, I wanna show you my room!” She tugged gently but stopped when Ethan knelt down in front of her.

“Give me two minutes with Leanne first honey, then she’s all yours.” He offered her a smile, and the girl returned it gently, nodding her head before releasing her hand. She skipped off down the hallway toward what Leanne could only presume was her room, and Ethan stood to face her with a soft smile. “Um, so, this is the house…” He gestured around behind him, turning as he did so. “Kitchen’s through there, bathroom’s through the closed door. Her room’s the one in the back, off the kitchen. I’ll leave some cash for dinner, and my sister’s number is on the fridge in case you guys need anything. I shouldn’t be more than an hour or two.”

Leanne watched as he shifted on his feet, running his fingers through his hair with a sigh. She wanted to do something to comfort him, his nervousness very apparent at this point, but she didn’t know how to help so instead she just smiled. “I’m sure we’ll be fine Ethan.” 

Ethan nodded his head and sighed again, turning to face her, his eyes soft and longing. “Thank you so much Leanne.” He reached forward and before Leanne knew what was happening he had pulled her in for a hug. “Thank you.” He whispered against her hair, pressing the gentlest of kisses to her ear.

“You’re welcome.” She whispered back, tightening her hold around him before pulling back. She adjusted his shirt collar and offered him a smile as she spoke. “You should get going.”

“Yeah.” He dropped his arms reluctantly and turned toward the hallway, smiling when the little girl came bounding out of her room, already dressed in unicorn pajamas. “I gotta go angel.” He extended his arms toward her and she leapt into them willingly. “You be good for Leanne, you here?”

She nodded her little head excitedly and reached her hands out, taking Ethan’s cheeks in her palms, pulling him in so that she could press a kiss to his forehead. “I will Daddy, I promise.” She offered him a small smile before pushing herself out of his arms and onto the floor. “We’re gonna have so much fun!” She grabbed Leanne’s hand again and tugged, and this time Leanne followed.

She heard the front door shut a minute later and she let out a breath, the quiet house settling around her as she watched the little girl open the door to her small room. The walls were still a stark white, and a simple twin bed rested against one wall. There was a small dresser tucked into the corner and a bookcase against the wall by the door. But there wasn’t much else in the way of decorations, save for a unicorn lamp on the dresser and a picture of Ellie and Ethan on the bookcase. She sighed, knowing that Ethan was just working with what he had, but she felt bad for the girl. _Every little girl should have a fantastic room to grow up in._

Caitlin had been into the ocean. Fish, coral, seashells, mermaids and the like. She had worked tirelessly to paint the walls of the girl’s room a soft turquoise and John had hung picture after picture of various beach scenes on the wall. She had had a mermaid comforter and pillows, and Leanne had even given in and let the girl have a small fish tank. She still remembered how disappointed Caitlin had been when Eli told her that she couldn’t have a mermaid because mermaids weren’t real. 

“I asked daddy if we could paint my room but he says that I have to wait.” Leanne was snapped out of her thoughts when the little girl spoke, and she turned her eyes in the direction of the sound. 

“Why is that?” She asked softly, watching as the girl climbed up onto her bed and clung to her stuffed unicorn.

“In case I don’t get to stay with him.” The tears were threatening to fall from her small, gray eyes and Leanne felt her heart clench at the sight in front of her. She couldn’t imagine what the girl was going through, how hard this all must be on her. She had quite literally been ripped from one life and thrown into another. And while Leanne guessed that she was much better off with her father, she had to wonder what exactly she was leaving behind. _Other than a mother that hated her of course._

“I’m sure that won’t happen love.” Leanne moved further into the room and sat down at the foot of the girl’s bed, offering her the best supportive smile she could muster. “I know that your daddy is working really hard to keep you here with him.”

Ellie nodded her head softly, wiping at her cheeks with her free hand. “I hope so.” Her voice was quiet, and Leanne took a moment to take in the image in front of her. It was like looking at a ghost. A ghost of the little girl who had once been her daughter. Save for the eye color, Ellie eerily resembled Caitlin, and it sent shivers down her spine. _What have I done to deserve this?_

Leanne felt almost guilty for thinking that, but she wasn’t entirely sure where she had gone wrong in life to lose her daughter in the first place. And now? To have another child who so closely resembled her baby come into her life. She couldn’t decide if it was a curse, or a blessing. _Or maybe it was a little of both._

“Leanne?” The girl’s voice brought Leanne out of her thoughts once again and she turned to look at her with a smile. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course sweetie. What is it?” She reached out and tucked a loose strand of hair behind Ellie’s ear while she waited for her to respond and it made her heart swell at the sweet smile the girl offered her in return.

“Are you daddy’s girlfriend?” The question was soft and almost timid and Leanne watched as Ellie eyed her curiously.

“No sweetie, I’m not daddy’s girlfriend.” _But I kind of wish I was._

“Oh okay.” She seemed dissatisfied with the answer she had received and she returned her gaze to the stuffed animal in her arms. “Why are you being so nice to us then?”

Leanne did a double take at the words, and she had to blink her eyes several times to control the tears that threatened to fall. She wondered how often this poor girl had anything nice done for outside of this household. _Probably never._

“Because your daddy is my best-friend Ellie.” She reached out and brushed away the tears falling down her cheek, lifting her head so that their eyes could meet. “I would do anything for your daddy. And now,” She ruffled her hair playfully as she offered her a smile, “I would do anything for you.”

That seemed to satisfy the girl because she smiled brightly before throwing her arms around Leanne’s neck and pulling herself into her lap. Letting out a chuckle, Leanne wrapped her arms around the girl and pulled her tightly to her chest, hugging her with all her might. She could definitely get used to these kinds of hugs again. 

Caitlin had given the best hugs and Leanne would fight anyone who had tried to deny that. Even her son hadn’t been as snuggly as the little girl. She had remembered that the thing she missed the most after the accident was Caitlin’s hugs. There were days where she would’ve just given anything to have the girl in her arms for five more minutes. Just one more big hug. She remembered crying more over the loss of those little squeezes than she had over anything else.

And yet, here she was, in the arms of a girl who could’ve been her daughter’s twin sister. And her heart stopped. She squeezed Ellie tighter, dropping a kiss to her hair as she did, and she couldn’t help but smile when she felt the girl kiss her shoulder back. She knew that she should stop comparing this sweet little princess to her daughter, but she couldn’t help it. She felt like she was getting a massive do-over. And she swore that she’d do this one right.

“Can we order some pizza now?” Ellie’s voice was soft, muffled by the fabric of Leanne’s t-shirt, but she heard it all the same. “I’m hungry.” As if on cue, the little girl’s stomach growled, and she pulled back to eye Leanne widely. Giggling, she covered her face and fell back on the bed.

“I would say so.” Leanne chuckled, reaching out to pat her leg gently. “What kind of pizza shall we order my dear?”

Ellie sat up and pondered the question for a minute, her finger tapping her nose as she thought, a trait she had inherited from her father, whether he wanted to admit it or not. “Pepperoni and mushroom!”

Leanne raised an eyebrow at the girl’s choice in toppings. “Mushrooms? Really?” She wanted to clarify, considering that she knew plenty of grown adults who couldn’t even fathom mushrooms, much less a six year old.

“Yeah!” Ellie eyed her suspiciously and Leanne got a vibe from her that she was used to only getting from a certain someone while in the middle of a Code Black. “They’re the best.”

Shaking her head, Leanne offered her a grin and stood up, reaching to pull her phone from her back pocket. “Pepperoni and mushrooms it is then.” She looked up the information for the pizza place and dialed the number as she made her way into the living room. She saw the $40 Ethan had left on the table by the door and she shook her head. _I can at least pay for pizza Ethan, jeeze. _She told the man on the other end what she wanted and thanked him when he told her it would be about thirty minutes.__

__Sighing to herself she turned, eyeing the small room from her spot by the door. It wasn’t a large room, but it was definitely the biggest in the house. There was a small couch against the far wall, and the entertainment center across from it housed a small TV. One that she thought was entirely to small for Ethan. There was a small easy chair sitting in the space to the side and she could tell from the brightly colored unicorn blanket on top that it must be Ellie’s seat of choice. There was a small kitchen table sitting under the big picture window, and a small cabinet against the far wall, a mismatched assortment of items lining the shelves. She could tell that Ethan had thrown the house together in a hurry and she did a double take, eyeing the items surrounding her suspiciously. That was when she noticed it, none of his nice furniture from his apartment was anywhere to be seen._ _

__She wondered if this had been someone else’s house at some point and maybe the furniture was being borrowed. She remembered him saying he had a step-sister, so maybe there was other family she didn’t know about. She sighed, things were getting more and more interesting with every second. Wondering if any of his other furniture was elsewhere in the house she made her way to the back room, opening the door softly. She noted that the small desk and chair were not the same ones that he had had in his office at his apartment. Rather, they were old and looked like they had probably been around the block a few times. Closing the door, she made her way to the front room, Ethan’s room she could only assume, and she opened the door softly. The king size bed was definitely not the same item from his apartment and neither was the ugly gray dresser pressed against the wall by the window. The TV however, she recognized that TV. It used to hang on the wall in his apartment and they had watched many a baseball game on that TV in their almost 2 years of friendship._ _

__“Leanne…” Ellie’s sweet voice broke her from her thoughts and she softly closed the door behind her, making her way back toward the little girl’s room with a smile._ _

__“I’m here sweetie.” She leaned against the door frame and eyed the girl softly. She looked downright exhausted, and Leanne wondered if she would even make it until the pizza arrived._ _

__“Can I watch a show while we wait for dinner?” Her gray eyes were pleading and while Leanne wasn’t sure on what Ethan’s TV policy was for the young girl, she figured one show couldn’t hurt. _Especially considering she would probably fall asleep before it was even over.__ _

__“I don’t see why not.” Leanne offered her softly, watching as she climbed down off the bed, her unicorn still stuck under her arm. “Lead the way.” She gestured for the girl to take them in the direction she wanted to go and she smiled when she climbed into the old easy chair, her body molding perfectly against the back. Leanne reached down and took the blanket from Ellie, smiling when the girl immediately turned the TV on and picked a show. She covered her lightly and when the girl snuggled down against the material she bit back a sob. _Just, like, Caitlin.__ _

__“You can watch too Leanne.” Her voice was quiet and she eyed Leanne softly over her unicorn’s head. “Daddy doesn’t like this show, so he usually works while I watch it.”_ _

__Leanne let out a soft chuckle and turned her attention toward the TV, a cartoon image of a young girl riding a brown horse grabbing her attention. “Okay.” She moved to sit on the couch and as much as she was sure it served its purposes for this small family, it certainly was nothing like the big leather couch Ethan had in his apartment. The couch that she spent many a night on, most of the time alone, but not always. She remembered on a handful of occasions falling asleep resting against Ethan or waking up with her feet still in his lap, his hand resting gently on her legs. _They certainly could never have fallen asleep together on this couch.__ _

__She was startled out of her thoughts by her phone beeping and she pulled it from her pocket to check. She saw Ethan’s name flash across the screen and she smiled softly, her eyes shifting to the little girl next to her for a brief second before she returned her attention to the object in her hands. She swiped open the device and read his text, shaking her head gently at his words._ _

___Everything okay? She hasn’t driven you insane yet has she?_ She let out a soft chuckle, knowing surely where Ellie got her dramatic streak from._ _

___No Ethan, she hasn’t driven me insane yet._ She hit send and eyed the quiet girl softly, she honestly didn’t know how someone so sweet could drive anyone insane. _ _

___Good. I should be home in about an hour. You order food?_ Speaking of food, Leanne’s stomach started to growl and she eyed a giggling Ellie, sticking her tongue out at her, causing the young girl to laugh even more._ _

___Pizza should be here in 10-15._ She replied back, and even though she wanted to ask him how things were going, she refrained, figuring that if he wanted her to know anything, he’d tell her._ _

___Cool. Can we talk when I get there? After Ellie’s asleep?_ And there it was, his attempt to include her in his life. And while Leanne wanted so desperately to be a part of this, to be a part of their family, she was having a hard time. Every time she looked at Ellie it was breaking her heart more and more. She knew Ethan needed her to be his friend right now. But she didn’t know if she could do this._ _

___Yeah._ That was all she sent him, tossing her phone onto the table with a sigh. She didn’t even check to see if her replied back, just simply leaned her head back against the couch cushions, curling herself up some as her eyes settled on the TV in front of her._ _

__—_ _

__The pizza had arrived a few minutes after Leanne had tossed her phone aside and she had handed the delivery boy a $20 before wishing him a good night. She and Ellie had sat in the living room and ate from the box, not really caring much if this is what Ethan had in mind for the child’s Friday night dinner. In fact, she vaguely remembered there being talk of homemade lasagna at some point in time. But she wasn’t bothered with it now. Not when there was a six year old falling asleep into her pizza._ _

__She had helped Ellie clean herself up and she had watched with proud eyes as the girl brushed her teeth on her own. She had emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later and eyed Leanne from over the couch, asking if she could go to bed. Leanne hadn’t had the heart to say ‘no’ and she had tucked the little girl into her bed a minute later. She hadn’t even turned the lights off in the room before she heard Ellie’s breaths even out, the little girl’s tired body already succumbing to sleep._ _

__That had been an hour ago, and Leanne had taken to the couch after she put the rest of the pizza away, her phone serving as a source of distraction for only a few minutes before she gave up, her thoughts consuming her. She had curled up on the couch then, dragging Ellie’s fuzzy blanket over her lower half. She had just closed her eyes when she heard a car pull into the drive way, the engine cutting off almost immediately and a soft thud of a door shutting following. Sitting up, she tucked the blanket around her shoulders and waited for the key to hit the lock. But it never came. Sighing to herself she stood, peering through the blinds of the big window, only to see that it was Ethan’s neighbor coming home, not him._ _

__She let out another sigh and returned to her spot on the couch, wrapping the blanket around herself once more, she had closed her eyes again. This time though, she must’ve dozed off, because the next thing she knew there were gentle fingers on her cheek and then the blanket was being pulled up over her more. She felt Ethan drop a kiss to her head, but she held her eyes closed tight, not wanting him to know that she was awake._ _

__It’s not that the kiss surprised her. In fact, she was rather used to them by now. And while her and Ethan had ultimately decided that being “best friends was best” she found that he was still a very loving guy. He was always hugging her, especially when he could tell that she was having one of those moments or was stressing out. And he would drop kisses to her head more often than not when he would bid her goodbye after a movie night or an early morning run. He was also constantly squeezing her hands, even at work, and Jesse had made fun of her several times for their odd couple behavior. She had always known that Ethan was affectionate, but she had never truly paid attention to just how much she enjoyed it._ _

__She heard him move away from the couch and she chanced at opening one eye, watching as he made his way slowly down the hall, peering into the room at the end. He pulled Ellie’s door closed slightly before making his way into the bathroom and shutting the door. As much as Leanne wanted to stay, she knew that she should be going, and she figured this was the perfect chance to make a quick getaway. But she hadn’t even stood up fully when she heard a scream come from the darkened room behind her. Jumping up, she made her way to the back bedroom as quick as her legs would carry her and when she threw the door open she could barely make out Ellie’s shaking body on the bed, her arms wrapped tightly around her unicorn, the blankets having been kicked to the ground._ _

__“Ellie, honey, it’s okay.” She made her way closer slowly, not wanting to startle the small girl, and when Ellie looked up at her with big, lost eyes, she picked up her pace. She dropped herself onto the bed in front of the girl, sighing softly when Ellie climbed into her lap once more, her little arms going around Leanne’s waist tightly._ _

__“What the…?” She heard the bathroom door fly open a few seconds after she joined Ellie on the bed and she turned toward the doorway, the sight before her startling her back to the reality she was currently in._ _

__Ethan stood before her naked from the waist up, his hair still dripping with water, presumably from the shower he must’ve started without Leanne knowing. His eyes were wide and his right arm had grabbed the door frame to still himself. That was when she noticed that his left hand was clutched tightly around the towel that he had wrapped around his waist. And Leanne had to turn her head away quickly to stop the images from flashing in her head of what exactly was under that towel._ _

__She heard Ethan let out a sigh of what sounded like relief and she rubbed Ellie’s back gently as she felt the girl lift her head and eye her father over her shoulder. “I’m okay daddy.” Her voice was shaky, betraying the words she whispered to the man. “Leanne’s here.”_ _

__Another sigh left Ethan’s lips and she heard him retreat back toward the bathroom, closing the door softly behind him. Turning her attention to Ellie, Leanne gently pushed the girl back so that she could get a good look at her. Her eyes were still shedding tears, but their flow had calmed some since Leanne had first arrived. Her hair was a wild mess, sticking up in every direction, and Leanne was reminded of Ethan with his extreme bed head in the mornings. She was still shaking like a leaf though, and Leanne wasn’t okay with the fear that she saw behind the girl’s gray eyes._ _

__“What happened baby?” She spoke softly, reaching up to calm some of the girl’s hair. “Did you have a bad dream?”_ _

__Ellie shook her head gently, sniffling as she wiped at her face with her sleeve. “Yeah.” Again, her voice was quiet, and Leanne rubbed her head softly, trying to calm both of their nerves._ _

__“Do you want to talk about it?” She heard the toilet in the bathroom flush, and then the sink turn on, and she knew it was only a matter of time before Ethan came out of the bathroom and threw her out._ _

__“Not really.” She understood the girl’s desire not to talk about it, she got it. So she just leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the girl’s forehead instead._ _

__The door in the hallway opened softly and she watched as Ethan stepped out, now wearing a pair of flannel pajama bottoms and a t-shirt, his feet bare against the hard wood floors. He offered them both a soft, sleepy smile, and Leanne felt her heart tighten in her chest. God how she had missed that smile._ _

__“You girl’s okay?” He moved into the room quietly and stopped in front of them, offering them both a curious glance._ _

__Ellie nodded her head, turning her gaze upward toward the older man, and she hiccuped back a sob. “Just tired daddy.”_ _

__Ethan let out a sigh and knelt down in front of the bed, taking the girl’s head gently in his hands and locking their eyes. “I know baby.” He dropped a kiss to her head and Leanne watched as the girl sighed as well, hanging her head, dropping her arms to rest in her lap. “You need to sleep Ellie.”_ _

__“Okay.” Was all the little girl could muster before a yawn took over, and she blinked her eyes sleepily. “Can I go lay in your bed?”_ _

__Leanne’s heart clenched at the girl’s question. She remembered another little girl who seemed to gather great comfort from sleeping in her parent’s big bed. Especially after having a nightmare. She shook her head gently and stood, muttering out an ‘excuse me’ and moving to the bathroom, shutting the door behind her quietly. She heard Ethan and Ellie move about for a minute, the door to Ethan’s room opening and then shutting again behind them. Taking a deep breath, Leanne dropped her hands to the counter in front of her and eyed herself in the mirror. _God I look like shit._ She let out a strangled sound and turned the tap on, splashing some water on her face before leaning back against the wall. She heard the door open again, and she knew it was just a matter of time before she had to face Ethan again. She sighed, opting to buy herself some more time by actually using the bathroom and washing her hands, rather than just standing there._ _

__When she emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later she heard typing coming from the small room to her left, and she turned toward the door. Ethan was sitting on the other side of his desk, his laptop open in front of him, a pen held between his teeth as he used both hands to type something out. She knocked gently, eyeing him softly when he looked up at her from across the room._ _

__“I’m gonna get going.” She gestured behind her towards the door and she heard him let out a sigh. She knew he was going to get upset about this. She knew he was going to beg for her to stay and try to talk to her. But she just wasn’t ready for that yet._ _

__“Please don’t Leanne.” His voice was soft and she hung her head, it killed her that she was adding to his pain._ _

__“I don’t think it’s a good idea.” She lifted her head up slowly, her eyes filling with tears at the all images that were gathering in her head at that exact moment. “Me being here, I mean. It’s too much.”_ _

__Ethan hung his head and he pushed himself back from his desk, slowly making his way toward the doorway where she stood. He reached her before she could react, before she could pull away and run out the door. And then his lips were on hers and she felt her whole world ignite. His hands went to her hair and he backed her against the open door with such ease that it felt like they had been doing this all their lives. She wanted to keep kissing him, _God did she ever want something so bad in her life_ , but she knew it needed to stop. She knew it wasn’t right. She hated it, but she knew it, and with that she pushed him back, her arms holding him away from her as she tried to catch her breath._ _

__“What…” She inhaled deeply, her hands shaking against his biceps and she closed her eyes tightly, a fresh round of tears making their way forward. “What the hell are you doing?”_ _

__“I…” She could hear the hesitation in his voice. She could feel it in his trembling hands, which were now going to run through his hair, having left hers a mess against the oak door behind her. “I don’t know.” He sighed, turning away from her and twisting his neck back and forth._ _

__“I’m gonna go now Ethan.” She turned on her heels as quick as she could and grabbed for her car keys before he could stop her. She was halfway down his front steps when he caught up to her, his hand going out to grab her arm gently, turning her to face him in the dimming light of early evening._ _

__“Please Leanne…” His eyes were dark and pleading, and she couldn’t handle it._ _

__“I can’t do this Ethan. I can’t be here.” And with that she turned away once more, pulling her arm from his grasp as she headed for her car. She climbed in and slammed the door shut, eyeing him through tear-filled eyes as she started the engine. She expected him to turn away, or maybe to run after her, but instead he just stood there, his arms hanging loosely by his sides, tears running down his cheeks. And that was how she left him. Standing there alone, crying in his front yard. _And it broke her heart.__ _


	7. That’s Not Who I Am

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *This is a loooong chapter. You’re welcome.  
>  ****It is also, pure and utter smut, you’re welcome and you have been warned.****

Leanne had cried the whole way home from Ethan’s that night, and when she had pulled into her driveway she had sat and stared at the dark house for a good twenty minutes before finally making her way inside. She knew that no one was waiting for her. That no one cared if she made it home safe. And part of her wanted nothing more than to turn around and go back to Ethan’s. She knew good and well that he would welcome her with open arms. That he would probably hold her all night if that’s what she wanted. She would probably get to snuggle Ellie endlessly and there would more than likely be coffee and pancakes waiting for her when she woke up. But she just couldn’t do it. As much as she wanted it, she knew it was wrong.

She had eventually showered and pulled on her pajamas, climbing under the covers of her big, empty bed with a sigh, and turned the TV on. She flipped channels for a few minutes before giving up, clicking the TV off with a huff, and she had just flopped back against the pillow when her phone buzzed beside her. Rolling over, she bit her tongue when she saw Ethan’s name on the screen.

_I’m sorry Lea._ Was all it said and she knew that he was being sincere. Yet, it wasn’t enough. Her heart wasn’t strong enough for this, not anymore, not after everything she had been through.

_So am I._ She hit send and then tossed her phone across the room with a scream. She hated this. She hated everything about this.

—

That had been seven days ago. Seven, excruciatingly long days ago. And Leanne had nearly had enough. Ethan had tried to text her several times over the weekend, but she ignored every single message. Even the ones that stated that Ellie was asking for her. He was hitting low, real low, and Leanne knew that he thought that he knew what he was doing. But now, now it was all about self-preservation, and as much as she wanted to see the little girl, she was doing whatever it took to keep herself safe.

But then Leanne’s day had gone from bad to worse to absolutely, downright, horrible in a matter of hours, and that had been her final straw. She been working tirelessly the last four hours to try and save two kids, the victims of a hit and a run accident, and it had not only been physically demanding, but also mentally and emotionally demanding. 

The cousins hadn’t been much older than her own children, and despite Jesse’s reassurance that they could do this without her, she hadn’t budged. They were able to save the older child, a boy, not much older than Eli had been, and she had rushed to help them with the younger of the two. She had joined Rollie at the patient’s bedside and one look down at the little girl had sent a wave of heartache through her body. The child was roughly the same age as Caitlin, and probably not much younger than Ellie was, and that had been it. She had let out a strangled sob and backed away, her hands going to her mouth as she bumped into Mario’s chest. And when the resident saw the image in front of him, a little girl covered in blood, no longer breathing, he knew exactly why Leanne had backed away so fast. _Ellie._

Leanne had turned around when she felt the younger man’s hands on her shoulders and she snapped out of it, shoving past him and running down the hall, stripping off her gown as she went. She had wanted to go to the bathroom, but she knew that was too public of a place, she retreated to her office instead, shutting and locking the door behind her. She leaned her back against it and let out a sob, her body sliding downward until she was crouched down, her arms going around her knees as her head fell forward. 

There was only thing that she needed right now. Or rather, there was only one person that she needed. Ethan. She knew that it was wrong of her to use him like this, but she needed too. He was her rock. And she was used to him being there for her when she had bad days. And today, well today was the definition of a bad day. She reached into her pant’s pocket and pulled her phone out, swiping it open and finding Ethan’s chain of text messages. She sighed inwardly as she typed out her message.

_I wish you were here._ She hit send and let her head fall back against the doorframe, the tears falling down her cheeks as she tried to control her breathing. The ringing of her phone pulled her back to reality and when she looked down, she was greeted with an image of Ethan’s smiling face, and her sobs increased. Hitting accept, she took a deep breath before speaking quietly into the phone.

“Hi.” Her voice sounded foreign to her, sad and broken in a way it hadn’t been since Ethan had walked into her life.

“Hi.” His voice was soft and comforting, and Leanne wanted nothing more than to crawl through the phone and right into his arms. “Are you okay?”

Shaking her head back and forth, Leanne felt the tears increase as she whispered back. “No.”

Ethan let out a sigh and she heard moving him around on the other end, probably trying to settle Ellie down or do something important around the house. “What’s wrong?”

“Everything.” And Leanne’s tears increased ten fold. She hated this. She hated this so fucking much. She just wanted to be with Ethan right now. That was all she wanted. That was all she needed. But she knew that she couldn’t. She knew that she couldn’t keep getting attached, to him or to Ellie, and her heart was breaking at the thought.

“Talk to me Lea.” She could hear the gentleness in his tone and it sent shivers down her spine. “What do you need hun?”

She sobbed again, banging her head backward against the door as the tears in her eyes begun to sting. “You.” Was all she was capable of saying in between her sobs, and she heard him let out a breath on the other end of the line.

“Why don’t you come over?” He sounded hesitant, and it made her nervous. “Ellie’s spending the night with my dad and step-mom. She’s going to some carnival with my nieces in the morning. You could stay over?”

Leanne knew exactly what he meant by that. She knew exactly what he wanted. And a very large part of her wanted that too. But she knew that she should say ‘no’. She knew that she should decline his offer for what would most definitely be pity sex. 

“I don’t think that’s a smart idea.” She couldn’t believe she was doing this. She had wanted to spend the night in the man’s bed since she had first laid eyes on him in Center Stage, but she knew that this wasn’t how it was supposed to happen. “I really should go Ethan.”

“Leanne…” But then she had hung up on him with a huff. Tossing her phone onto the floor beside her, her head falling backward as her tears continued to fall.

She allowed herself a few more minutes of pity, but then she snapped herself out of it and stood. Grabbing her phone, she made her way to her desk where she grabbed her purse and her keys. She left her office in a hurry, and she had successfully made it all the way to her car before another round of tears hit. She drove home in silence, nothing but the sound of her gentle sobs filling the car.

When she got home she had stormed upstairs, throwing her items onto the bed with a growl, and headed straight for the shower. She knew just what she needed, a warm shower, a nice glass of wine, and her bed. That would be the perfect remedy for a shitty day. Except it wasn’t. Her water pressure had been horrible and then she realized she was out of wine. And at that point, she was just done. She had glanced at the clock on her bedside table and sighed when she was saw that it was only 8:00pm. She threw herself onto the bed with a huff and grabbed her phone from its spot on the pillow. Sliding it open she raised a curious eyebrow when she saw that the notification above her text messages showed that she an unread one. Opening it, she let out a frustrated growl.

_I’m here if you need me. Please don’t hesitate. I’ve been kind of lost without you lately._ She threw her phone across the room again, and she was honestly surprised that the thing hadn’t shattered yet.

She rolled over and buried her face into her pillow, letting out a scream as she clutched the item tight in her hands. She was so fucking done. She rolled back over and figured that sleep was the only way that she was going to make it through this in one piece. So with that, she curled up under the covers and closed her eyes, willing her body to relax and drift off.

That had been three hours ago. And her body had done everything but relax and drift off. She had tossed and turned, rolling from one side of the bed to the other. She had even tried sleeping with her head at the foot of the bed and her feet at the head of the bed. But nothing had helped. She had counted sheep, she had practiced meditating, she had tried everything. And yet, nothing. Sighing loudly she stood and moved to grab her phone from off the floor. She opened it, and Ethan’s words stared back her.

She let out another growl and stormed downstairs, grabbing her purse and her keys, sliding her feet into the closest pair of shoes she could find, and walked out in a huff. She slammed her door behind her, locking it quickly, and climbed into her car without a second thought. She had made it to Ethan’s driveway before she realized what she was doing. But fuck it, it was too late now.

Cutting off the engine Leanne sat and waited for a minute, watching for any signs of movement in the tiny house. She could see a light flickering in Ethan’s room, but she couldn’t tell if it was the TV or his phone. Glancing at the clock on the dash board she noticed that it was 11:30pm and she wondered why he wasn’t asleep. Surely he should be relishing in the ability to get to bed at a halfway normal time. Sighing, Leanne exited the car and shut the door quietly, not wanting to draw any unwanted attention to herself. She made her way quietly up the stairs and hesitated again, if he was asleep, and she rang the bell and woke him, she was going to feel really bad. So instead, she knocked. 

She was just getting ready to walk away when she heard the big door open and a soft sigh escape Ethan’s lips. “Leanne…?”

Turning back around she eyed him softly, the sight before her sending butterflies to her stomach. Ethan was standing in the doorway clad only his pajama bottoms and his hair was perfectly ruffled. He was still a little scruffy around the edges too, and Leanne found herself finding it more attractive than she normally did. His eyes were soft and gentle as they peered at her through the screen and they looked tired.

“Hi.” Her voice was soft and she wondered how horrible she must look, standing on his front porch at ten to midnight clad in her pajamas and flip flops.

Ethan let out a soft chuckle and reached forward to open the screen door, eyeing her from top to bottom and back again. “Nice PJs.” There was a humor in his voice that Leanne had missed, and she couldn’t help the corners of her lips from curling upward.

“Sorry. I didn’t think you would mind.” She joked back, and God did it feel good to be able to joke with him again.

He shook his head back and forth softly and offered her a smile. “Would you like to come in?”

She didn’t trust her voice at this point, because she knew what was more than likely going to happen when she walked through the door, so she chose to shake her head up and down instead. He gave her a smile as he stepped back, allowing her to walk in front of him, before pulling the door shut. He had his hand on the heavy door behind her when she turned around, and the way his eyes shimmered in the moon light seeping in through the half open door did her in.

Reaching forward, she placed her hands on his cheeks, pulling him in for a kiss, pushing him gently until his back was against the door. He grunted against her lips and she kissed him harder as his hands came around to land on her ass. Pushing at him roughly she ground her hips against his as she ran her tongue roughly around his lips, begging for entrance. And boy did he grant it, and then some. They stood there making out like a bunch of horny teenagers for a good ten minutes, their hands going everywhere their mouths wanted to, their lips glued to each other like they had never tasted anything so sweet in their lives. 

Ethan was the first to pull back and Leanne let out a growl as he stopped his ministrations, his hands moving to settle on her ass once again. “As much as I’m enjoying this,” he whispered against her swollen lips, “I am not having sex with you against my front door.”

She nipped at his lips, her hands reaching down to the waistband of his pants. He hissed against her mouth when she slipped a hand inside his boxers, gripping his erection tightly. “Leeeeaaaane.” He growled, his hands moving in between them to try and stop her. She giggled then, nipping at his neck this time, her hand moving steadily around his member. She knew that she could get him off right then and there, but where would the fun in that be? So she stopped, her hand trailing its way back up his groin to his stomach, where she planted it flat against the toned skin of his abs.

“Bedroom?” She whispered, her eyes dark as they bore into his. He didn’t respond to her though, instead he reached down and cupped her just under her butt, lifting her up in one swift motion. She wrapped her legs around his waist and claimed his mouth in another kiss, her hands going to fist in his hair.

He carried her to the bedroom where he backed her against the door after closing it behind them. She pulled back, her head resting against the cool surface as he moved his mouth to her neck, kissing and nipping gently. She groaned when he bit down in just the right place, and she rolled her hips against his, smiling when he moaned against her skin. 

“Killing me.” He mumbled, his hands moving to the hem of her pajama shirt, yanking it over her head quickly and tossing it behind them. She smirked down at him and tried to pull his head up for another kiss, but he was having none of her shenanigans. Not anymore. Instead, he bent his head down and claimed a nipple in his mouth, rolling his tongue in just the right way that sent Leanne’s head spinning. She arched her back at his movements and gripped his head tightly, his name escaping her lips in a strangled moan. She felt him chuckle against her breast, his head moving to continue it’s movements against the other. She tugged on his hair, urging him upward, but again, he refused, this time nipping at the inside of her breast gently. “Fucking killing me.” She heard him mumble again, and she couldn’t handle it anymore. If he didn’t take her right then and there she was going to lose her damn mind.

Yanking on his hair just hard enough for his head to pull back, she eyed him lustfully. “Bed Ethan,” She pulled him back up and kissed him hard, pushing herself off the door with all her might, causing him to stumble backward slightly, “now.” She wasn’t normally demanding in the bedroom, but dammit she wanted him.

He deepened the kiss, his tongue pushing it’s way into her mouth roughly, his hands tangling in her hair as he walked them toward the bed. He dropped her gently against the mattress and when she crawled up toward the pillow she saw the most delicious look in his eyes. She didn’t have time to think though because the next thing she knew he was in the bed too and his hand was under her pajama bottoms, skimming the lace of her underwear, and she let out a moan as he claimed her nipple in his mouth again. He moved his mouth downward, stopping to press kisses to her stomach, his hands moving to slide her pants and underwear down slowly. He followed the movement of the garments with his tongue, kissing the inside of her thigh devastatingly slowly, and she arched her back again when his breath hit her core. She needed him, and she needed him now.

Grabbing at his shoulders she pulled him back up to her, slamming her lips against his as she pushed his pajama pants down his hips, his boxers following. She had just run her tongue along the roof of his mouth when she felt his finger slid into her and she moaned, her leg hooking around his as she rolled them over with ease. She smiled to herself at the look of shock on Ethan’s face.

“Two can play at that game.” She whispered, shaking her head so that her hair fell to one side, and she bent back down, taking his lips in hers once more. She felt him chuckle into the kiss, removing his finger from within her so that he could grip her hips tightly. Grinding her hips against his she smiled into the kiss when she felt him squirm, his hands flattening against her back. She rose up slowly, just enough to situate herself above him, and she slid down onto his erection slowly, moaning. He pulled her back down for another kiss, and she ran her hands up his chest as she ground her hips against his.

He tangled his hands in her hair and pulled her back slightly, their foreheads touching, sweat beading across both of their brows. He got ready to flip them over when she locked her leg in place and shook her head at him. “Don’t even think about it.” She growled, her hips continuing their rocking, her hands moving to grip his shoulders tightly. He surprisingly didn’t try again, and she wondered if this felt as good for him as it did for her.

“Damn woman.” He growled, pulling her head back to his roughly, his lips assaulting hers as he thrust upward, his other hand moving down between them to grip her breast tightly. He ran his thumb along her nipple and she moaned into the kiss, her back arching just enough to send an extra wave of pleasure through them both. She felt him tighten his grip on her head and she kissed him hard, reaching up to tangle one of her hands through his hair as she picked up the pace. 

She could feel herself getting close and when he pulled away from her slightly she let out a whimper, “Don’t…” But she didn’t get to finish that thought because the next thing she knew his hand had moved from her breast to between her legs and he was rubbing his thumb against her core. She bucked her hips and dropped her head to his shoulder, biting down softly as she moaned against the sweaty flesh. 

He chuckled again, but then she twisted her hips and ground against him roughly, and that had been enough to shut him up. That was until she felt herself starting to tighten around him, her climax close, and she returned her lips to his, kissing him so hard she was sure they would be bruised in the morning. She could tell he was close too, the way his hand was shaking against her hip, the other tightening it’s grip around her hair, and she rose up slightly, breaking their locked lips. Sitting up almost completely she rocked her hips a few more times, his hands tightening around her waist so hard she knew for certain he was going to leave marks, but she didn’t care. She felt herself reaching her breaking point and when he reached up for her, a longing, lustful look in his eyes, well that right there had done her in. Leaning down, she kissed him long and hard, her core tightening around him just as he came within her, and she was glad that he hadn’t had to hear the screams of pleasure she most definitely would’ve let out. 

After she felt herself start to come down from her high she pulled back, dropping her head to his shoulder for a brief second so that she could catch her breath. She heard him let out a breath, his hands smoothing themselves gently down her back, caressing her sweaty skin gently. She almost fucking lost it then. 

Pushing herself upward, she slowly rolled herself off of him, groaning at the sudden loss of contact, and she moved to get up from the bed. She was stopped when his hand grabbed her arm lightly, tugging on her as her feet hit the floor.

“Where ya going?” His voice was lazy and she knew that if she turned back around he’d be staring at her with those damn lustful eyes, and she couldn’t handle that right now, so she kept her eyes focused on the floor.

“Home.” She whispered softly, bending down to grab her panties from their spot next to the bed. She slid them up slowly, only to stop when she felt the bed shift behind her, his hands going to hers and stopping her movements.

“Why?” His breath was warm against her neck and she hung her head. She had disappointed him once again and it was breaking her heart.

She didn’t know what to say, so she just continued her movements, lifting her hips off of the edge of the bed so that she could slide her underwear over her butt. She moved to stand, her eyes searching the room for her pajama bottoms, when she felt him wrap an arm around her waist, pulling her back down to the bed gently. 

“I’m not that kind of guy you know.” He whispered his head falling to her shoulder, his lips leaving a trail of kisses against her warm flesh. If she hadn’t known any better she would think that he was crying. But that would be ridiculous because there was no way that sex with her was good enough to make him want to keep her around. 

Dropping her head down she shook it back and forth. “Well maybe I’m that kind of girl Ethan. You ever stop to think about that?” She whispered quietly.

“Bullshit.” He muttered against her skin, his hand tightening it’s grip against her waist.

“I can’t be here Ethan.” She choked out, the tears forming in her eyes as she started to shake. She couldn’t do this here. Not right now. She couldn’t let him see her break.

Ethan pressed another trail of kisses along the other shoulder and slowly worked his arms around her, pulling her so that her back was against the mattress, his body hovering over her. “Why not?”

She closed her eyes so that she didn’t have to look at him. _This was too painful._ She needed this to stop. Her throat felt like it was going to close up and she couldn’t breath all of a sudden. She pushed him, hard, trying to get him to get off of her, trying to get away from him, but nothing worked. That was until she let out a gasp, “I think I’m gonna be sick.” And with that his arms flew to the air, his body rolling off of her as she made a run for the bathroom. She slammed the door behind her, her knees hitting the floor as she emptied the contents of an entire day’s worth of food into his toilet bowl. _What a fucking mess I am._

Flushing the toilet, she fell back against the cool tile of the bathroom wall and closed her eyes shut tight, her hand going to run through her hair as she let out a sob. There was a soft knock on the door, but she couldn’t find her voice, so she just hoped that he would leave her alone. 

_No such luck._

“Babe?” He pushed the door open gently and eyed her from around the frame, concern etched into every corner of his handsome face. “You okay?”

Again, she couldn’t find words, so she just shook her head ‘no’ from its position against the wall. She watched as he stepped into the small room quietly, grabbing a towel from the rack and running it under the tap. He knelt down beside her, wiping her face gently with the damp rag, his other hand settling on her bare thigh as he sat down on the floor with her. She leaned her head back again, letting the coolness of the cloth comfort her, and she choked out a quiet ‘thank you’ as she wrung her shaking hands together in front of her.

“You’re welcome.” He whispered, tossing the cloth into the sink behind him, his hand then moving to run through her hair gently. “Why don’t you shower?”

She nodded her head gently, a shower sounding like a great idea, and she moved to stand along with him, only to feel the world shift under her feet. She gripped his arm for support, the other going to her head, which she dropped forward against his bare chest. They stood that way for a few minutes before his soft voice broke the silence. “Come on, let’s shower so you can get some rest.” He reached around him and gently turned the water on, letting it get warm as he held her gently against his body with the other arm.

She wanted to object. She wanted to tell him that there was no way that she was going to shower with him, not now, not ever, but then his gentle hands were pushing her underwear down and he was helping her step out of them and into the shower, and she knew there was no way that she could do this without him. Ethan stepped out of his boxers quietly and slowly entered the shower behind her, his hands resting themselves gently on her hips as he pulled her back against him. He dropped a kiss to her shoulder and nuzzled her hair gently and she felt her heart burst at the seams. He really shouldn’t be so nice to me right now. I don’t deserve this.

Neither one of them spoke as they showered quickly, washing only the necessities before Ethan cut off the water with a gentle sigh. He stepped out first, grabbing his towel from off the hook and drying his upper half quickly before wrapping the towel around his waist. He then grabbed a clean towel from off the rack behind the toilet and extended his arms outward toward her, offering her a soft smile as he did. She shivered in the coolness of the now silent room, and stepped forward slowly, entering his embrace with a sigh. He wrapped the towel around her gently, before letting go and he returned his attention to drying himself off. Once he was done, he grabbed his boxers off of the floor and slid them on, Leanne’s eyes watching his every move.

“Take your time. I’ll leave some clothes for you on the hamper outside the door.” He dropped a kiss to her head and with that he was gone, leaving her standing alone for the first time in almost an hour.

She let out a sigh, followed by a sob, and she gently shook her head back and forth. She had to get over this. There was no way around this at this point. She had officially fucked up. She had just had sex with her best-friend. Mind blowing sex at that. And she couldn’t wrap her head around the idea that this was so very very wrong. She heard Ethan moving around outside the door and she bit her lip to keep her sobs from being audible to him, her arms wrapping tightly around herself as she began to shake again. She couldn’t believe she had been so stupid.

“I’m gonna make you some hot tea okay love?” His voice was timid sounding through the door, but she could hear the love in his words. “Just come out when you’re ready.”

Another sob left her body, and she knew that he had heard that one because she heard him let out a sigh. Dropping her head forward she decided it was best to just hurry up and get out there so that she could leave as soon as he was done yelling at her about how she had just ruined their friendship. _God this was the worst day in the history of ever._


	8. Ethan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *This is a short one, so I’ll do my best to post again tonight :)  
> **Here we have Ethan being adorable and falling apart slowly at the same time.

Ethan had retreated to the kitchen after hearing Leanne let out her last sob. He couldn’t stand to listen to her beat herself up like that, he had to walk away. He had quietly heated up some water and placed a tea bag in one of his mug’s when he heard the door open down the hall. He waited for the sound of footsteps but they never came. Pouring the now boiling water into the mug, Ethan moved into the doorway to see if he could see her, but she was nowhere to be found. The bathroom door was open though, and she wasn’t in there, so he held out hope that she had retreated to his room. He took the tea bag out of the mug and dropped it into the trash can, turning the light off with his free hand before making his way back to her.

He found her curled up against the now clean sheets, her hands tucked under her head which was resting on his pillow. He smiled softly, the sight before him one he had missed greatly. 

“Hey there.” He whispered, setting the mug down on the table by the bed. He moved to sit down next to her, his hand going out to rub her bare arm gently. She rolled over and eyed him sleepily, the tears in her eyes doing little to mask the exhaustion he saw in the brown orbs. “Feel better?”

She nodded her head at him, moving to sit up in front of him, the covers falling down over her bare thighs. “A little. Yeah.” She reached out for the mug on the table and he handed it to her softly, his hands staying on hers a little longer than necessary. He found himself looking for any excuse to touch her at this point.

Offering her a smile he ran his hands up her arms, stopping at her shoulders. “It’s chamomile, it’ll help you sleep.”

Nodding her head again, Leanne took a few sips of the tea as he continued to eye her quietly. Reaching up, he brushed back some of her hair, still damp from the shower, and he felt her shudder under his touch. “Sorry.” She whispered softly, her eyes closing as she leaned into his touch.

Chuckling softly he reached down and took the cup from her hands, placing it on the table once more. He looked back up at her with soft eyes and rubbed her shaking arms gently. “Let’s sleep?” It was a suggestion, not an order, and when he saw her nod her head gently at his offer, he couldn’t help but smile.

She laid down once more, curling back up on the bed, this time more toward the center than before and his smiled widen when he realized that she had left room for him on purpose. He reached up and turned the light off quietly, climbing into the bed behind her. Wrapping an arm around her waist he dropped a soft kiss to her shoulder, then one to her neck, and lastly one to her cheek. “Goodnight babe.” His head fell back against his pillow with his soft whisper and he felt her snuggle back against his chest.

“Goodnight Ethan.” She whispered back, her arm moving to cover his around her waist, her hand tangling itself with his. He smiled softly as he nuzzled his face against her hair, tightening his grip around her, his leg nudging itself between hers. She let out a soft chuckle as his cold foot ran along her leg and he felt like this had to the definition of heaven right here. All curled up with his best-friend under the warm blankets, their bodies exhausted from an amazing round of sex, their voices soft and quiet in the dim light. He didn’t care about much else in that current moment, except for how happy he was to finally have her in his arms. And he didn’t much give a damn about the consequences at this point.


	9. Movie Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Here we have our little family being just downright adorable together.   
> **P.S. Ethan and Leanne do a little making up.

When Ethan woke up the next morning his bed was empty, the spot where Leanne had once slept was cold, meaning she was long gone. He had hung his head and pouted for a few minutes before he realized the implications of what they had just done. He had essentially just gotten a booty call from Leanne. His best-friend. The person he trusted more than anyone. The woman who held his heart. And he panicked at what this would mean for them. He had texted her an apology, but she never replied. In fact, he didn’t talk to her again for a whole week, until she showed up at his front door the following Friday night and kissed him senseless right there on his front step. They had entered a vicious cycle, and Ethan didn’t know how to break it, or even if he wanted too.

They kept up that pattern for almost two months. Every Friday night for the next 7 weeks Leanne showed up at Ethan’s front door at a quarter to midnight. He would invite her in without a word, a simple gaze in her direction was all it took. The first night they had chit-chatted idly for a few minutes before making their way to the bedroom, but after that, it was simply game on and he would slam her back against the door as soon as it was shut. And then his lips would be against hers, his tongue begging for entrance, before she even got a chance to set her bag down.

They didn’t talk other than those late night meetings, and they didn’t really do much talking during those visits either. He would text her occasionally in the beginning, before he had gotten things settled enough to return to work. He would ask her how she was doing or try to invite her to hang out with him and Ellie, but she never responded. When he did finally return to work three weeks later he was expecting things to be awkward, but they weren’t. It was like he had gone back in time to two years ago, when Leanne would tolerate him, but didn’t really give him the time of day. He hated it. Absolutely hated it. 

He had tried to talk to her. Tried to get her to see that he wanted more than late night sex and awkward glances across Center Stage. He wanted her, all of her, and it was killing him knowing that she didn’t want the same thing. They had continued their rendezvous’ even after Ethan returned to Angels, but they still didn’t do much talking. He was tired of all the silence. He wanted his best-friend back. The woman he could talk to about anything. The woman that he confided in about Ellie, the woman the little girl so desperately needed.

Ellie had been disgruntled at first, angry that Leanne wasn’t around anymore. She had blamed Ethan for it for almost three weeks, until she spent the night with Noa one night and the older girl set her straight. She would still ask for her occasionally, and Ethan would catch her crying for her in the middle of the night, but she didn’t pester him about her anymore. She didn’t stop and listen every time his phone rang, waiting to see if the woman was on the other line. His heart broke for his daughter. He knew this was almost as hard on her as it was on him.

“Daddy…” The little voice calling him from the living room brought him out of his thoughts and he peered around the door frame, her gray eyes looking back at him from her place at the table in front of the window.

“Yes baby?” He asked cautiously, she had a glimmer of something in her eyes that told him that he wasn’t going to like what she was about to say.

“Why is Leanne’s car in the drive way?” Her voice was soft and timid, like she was almost afraid of what was going to happen. And then it hit him. _Today was Friday._ And while it wasn’t quite a quarter to midnight, she had been known to be early once or twice.

_Fuck._ He had meant to text Leanne and let her know not to come over. He meant to tell her that Ellie would be home and that she shouldn’t come over expecting anything other than a kiss, and probably cuddles from one very lonely six year old. But then Ellie’s school had called, saying that she still wasn’t feeling well, and he had had to bring her home instead of taking her to Mae’s. _Fuck, fuck, fuck. This was not good._

The doorbell rang and he set his dish towel down on the counter, offering the girl a soft smile as he made his way toward the door. He opened it slowly, his eyes meeting hers through the screen before either of them could speak.

“Hi.” Her voice was softer than he expected, and he certainly wasn’t used to be greeted with such gentleness. Normally at this point her hands were in his hair and his were pulling her shirt over her head. 

Shaking his head to rid himself of the thoughts he let out a soft sigh, opening the door fully, allowing her to enter. “Hi.” 

He watched as her eyes scanned the room, catching sight of the brunette girl who had returned to her coloring book, her eyes softening at the sight in front of her. “Ellie’s here.” She whispered, her eyes shifting to his, the questioning look in them scaring him almost.

“She’s got an ear infection.” He stepped back and allowed her to enter the rest of the way, closing the big door behind her, taking a deep breath when she turned to look at it. He wondered if her mind was going to the same place his was. They hadn’t even made it the to bedroom last time she had been here. In fact, he had taken her right there against that door, both of them still mostly clothed. “I meant to text you.” His voice was soft, and he reached out to run a hand down her arm.

“It’s okay.” She whispered back, her eyes shifting back to the girl. “I can go if you want.”

He shook his head gently, his hand moving to rest on her hip as he pulled her closer, pressing a kiss to her temple before he spoke. “No. Stay.” He peered down at her softly, his thumb rubbing against the skin above the waistband of her jeans. “Dinner’s in the oven.”

She nodded her head and leaned into him for a brief second, taking a deep breath as he reached up to brush some of her loose hair back with his left hand. “You don’t mind?”

“Of course not.” He dropped another kiss to her forehead, before resting his own in it’s spot, his eyes meeting hers as she finally looked up at him. He offered her a smile and she returned it, sending butterflies to his stomach and a shiver down his spine. “Ellie…” His voice carried across the small room quietly, and he looked from Leanne to eye the girl from his place by the couch. “Is it okay if Leanne stays for dinner?”

Ellie nodded her head excitedly, dropping her crayon to the table and jumping up. “Really?” She was bouncing up and down on her heels and her smile grew when Leanne nodded her head.

“Yes Ellie, really.” The girl let out a squeal and barreled toward the woman, throwing her arms around her with a grunt. Leanne smiled against the girl’s hair and gently lifted her up, settling her on her hip as she eyed her lovingly.

Ethan’s heart swelled at the sight in front of him and he couldn’t believe it. He couldn’t believe that Leanne was here at the same time as Ellie. That she was okay with there not being a roll in the hay. That she wanted to spend time with his daughter again. Hell, he was just thrilled that she had actually talked to him for the first time in 8 weeks.

“I made lasagna.” He offered, reaching out to brush back some of Ellie’s wild hair. “Should be done soon.”

Leanne nodded her head before resting it against the girl’s, and she offered him the most gentle smile he had seen from her in a while. “Sounds good.” Their eyes locked with her words and he knew that she was doing this because she wanted too, not because she felt obligated too. 

He stepped forward, his right hand going to her hip once more, and he pulled the two of them closer. Leaning in, he dropped a light kiss to his lover’s lips before turning to the young girl in her arms. Ellie smiled back at him softly, her head resting against Leanne’s shoulder, her arms wound around her neck. He pressed a kiss to his daughter’s head then, whispering an ‘I love you’ against her temple. He smiled when she whispered it back, her arms tightening their hold on the woman, like she was going to disappear at any second. Ethan was almost afraid that she just might.

——

They had enjoyed a nice dinner together and while quiet, the conversation that they had engaged in had been pleasant. Ethan was thrilled to finally hear Leanne’s voice again, and it made all the difference in the world that she was here in his home, speaking to not only him, but also to his daughter. She had asked Ellie about school, and she had been excited to hear that the girl would be starting dance class the following week. She had also informed Leanne of her “boyfriend”, some kid named Carter who apparently doted on Ellie hand and foot, of which Ethan was not okay with. But Leanne’s soft laugh and the twinkle in her eye when she reminded the girl that she had plenty of time to find the right man, made his heart race.

After dinner, Leanne had helped him cleared the plates and he had decided to put everything in the dish washer, his feet not really looking forward to all the standing that would be involved in washing so many dishes. Ellie had then wiped the table down and when Leanne complimented her on her helper skills the girl’s eyes had lit up. She had then bounded off down the hallway to get ready for bed, something Ethan was thankful for. He wanted a few minutes alone with Leanne before he was sure the woman was dragged off to spend time with the tot.

“How’s she holding up through all of this?” Leanne’s voice was soft as she leaned back against the door frame of the kitchen and when Ethan looked up from his spot at the fridge he noticed the soft smile gracing her face. She was the most beautiful thing in the world and he couldn’t believe how much he had taken her for granted the past few months.

“She’s doing good.” He moved closer to her, his hands going to her hips as he gently backed her against the kitchen counter, a smile breaking out on his face when she let out a small squeal. “She misses you terribly though.” He dropped his head to her neck, pressing kisses along the exposed skin above her shirt collar, his fingers dancing along her hips. “Same as me.” He whispered, his teeth grazing along her ear lightly.

“I know, I’m sorry.” Her voice was quiet and when she reached forward to place her hands against his chest he sighed, pressing a kiss to her cheek as he moved to rest his forehead against hers.

“It’s okay.” He whispered back, kissing her gently. She tasted like pasta sauce and red wine and he couldn’t get enough her. He deepened the kiss, his hands running along her back, her skin warm beneath her t-shirt, and he stopped at the buckle to her bra. He got ready to unsnap the God awful thing when he heard the bathroom door open and he quickly dropped his hands to the counter. “Shit.” He mumbled, pulling away from the kiss.

Leanne let out a soft chuckle and dropped her head to his shoulder, her arms going around his waist tightly. She squeezed, pressing a kiss to the fabric of his shirt, and he wrapped his arms around her in return.

“Daddy!” Ellie’s voice was gentle as she rounded the corner, and Ethan eyed her softly as she made her way toward them. “Can we watch a movie?”

Nodding his head, Ethan stepped back from Leanne’s embrace and knelt down in front of her, offering her a smile. “Of course baby. Why don’t you go get something set up for us?”

She nodded her head, her little eyes twinkling in the light of the room, and she walked away without another word. Ethan watched as Leanne’s eyes darkened when she noticed the girl had headed into his bedroom, rather than moving to the couch in the small room in front of them.

“We’re not watching out here?” Her voice was shaky, as were her hands, and when he stood and reached for her he sighed when she took a step back.

“We always watch movies in the bedroom.” He whispered softly, reaching for her again, this time he half-way succeeded. “It’s more comfy than laying on that stupid couch.” He offered her a smirk in hopes that it would help ease her worries, and when he saw her close eyes briefly he was almost certain that she was going to make a run for it. 

But then she squeezed his hands gently and offered him a sad smile. “Do you mind if I shower first? I came straight from work.” The words softened Ethan’s heart and he pulled her closer, his arms going around her waist loosely as he pressed a soft kiss to her lips. “I’ll be quick.” She offered, her eyes staring back at him curiously.

“Yes ma’am.” He whispered, leaning in to kiss her again. “I’m gonna go lay with the kid though so that I don’t get any ideas about climbing in there with you.” He winked and the laugh that she let out sent chills down his spine. He had missed that adorable laugh and he had missed the adorable woman it was coming from even more.

“Good idea.” She leaned forward and kissed him once more before pulling away. “My bag’s in the car.” He nodded his head at her and watched as she made her way outside. She was back in the door in a matter of seconds and he offered her one last wink, followed by a smile, as she ducked into the bathroom with a giggle.

He made his way into the bedroom where Ellie was sprawled out amongst the pile of pillows and blankets, her unicorn under her arm, her eyes glued to the TV screen in front of her. “Did Leanne leave?” She asked softly, and Ethan almost didn’t hear her. But when she turned her head to face him, the sad look in her eyes made him want to cry.

“No angel, she didn’t leave.” He moved to sit down next to her on the bed, brushing some of her hair back with a soft smile. “She’s just gonna take a shower first okay?”

She nodded her head, the smile from earlier returning to her face, and she turned her attention back to the program she had been watching. Ethan ruffled her hair gently and grabbed his pajama bottoms off the dresser, before heading into the hallway. He debated jumping in the shower with Leanne, but he knew that wasn’t a good idea, especially with Ellie awake, and laying on the other side of the wall. Sighing to himself, he decided to wait until she was done to take his shower, knowing that they would all be more comfortable once showered and ready for bed.

He had just made his way back down the hall from the kitchen, Ellie having asked for a bottle of water and her medicine, when Leanne emerged from the small bathroom. She was wearing a pair of flannel pajama bottoms and a t-shirt that he was 99.9% certain had been his at some point in time. She had a soft smile on her face and her wet hair was draped over her shoulders. Offering her a smile, he made his way toward her and reached for her waist, pulling her close so that he could drop a kiss to her head. _This was definitely something he could get used too._

“Stoooop.” She whispered playfully, swatting at him with one hand, the other going to pinch his butt. He leaned down and kissed her softly, smiling against her lips when he felt her relax in his arms. 

“Daaaadddyyyy…” Ellie’s voice echoed throughout the house and Ethan pulled back with a grunt. He had completely forgotten about the items in his hand and he laughed when Leanne raised an eyebrow at him and gestured for him to lead the way.

“Sorry baby.” He dropped the water bottle on the bed and poured her medicine into the little cup before handing it to her. He watched as she downed the medicine quickly, making a sour face at the taste, and he couldn’t but laugh at her groans of disgust. “I’m gonna shower real quick okay?”

The child nodded her head softly and dropped back against the pillows, hugging her unicorn close. He turned, offering Leanne a soft glance, before moving around her to the bathroom. He had showered quickly and dried off in a matter of seconds. Pulling on his boxers and then his pajama bottoms he stopped when he realized how quiet it sounded on the other side of the wall. He wondered for a brief second if they had both fallen asleep, but then he heard his daughter giggle and he couldn’t help but smile softly at the sound. He pulled a t-shirt over his head as he made his way out of the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

The sight he was greeted with when he entered the bedroom stopped him dead in his tracks, his heart clenching in his chest, tears forming behind his eyes. In front of him sat Leanne, his best-friend, the love of his life, and his daughter, his whole world, and they were giggling. Ellie was seated between Leanne’s legs, her arms having deposited the unicorn to the side so that they could rest on top of her criss-crossed legs. The girl’s hair had been pulled out of it’s messy pony tail (he was trying to get better at them, he swore) and was hanging around her shoulders. And Leanne was braiding it. Or at least, he suspected that was what the woman was trying to do before the giggle monster that was Eleanor Grace had attacked.

“Everything okay in here?” He asked softly from his spot where he had leaned against the door frame. Two sets of eyes turned to face him and they both broke out in another fit of giggles. He was starting to feel left out, not that he minded one bit.

“Yes Daddy, everything’s okay.” Ellie answered him softly, turning her head back straight, her shoulders relaxing as Leanne combed her fingers through her hair. 

“We were just laughing at your attempt to do her hair Ethan, that’s all.” Leanne offered him a mischievous smirk and he thought it was probably a good idea that his daughter was present, or else she’d be getting it right about now. Her eyes twinkled as she turned her attention back to the head of hair in front of her and he smiled knowingly.

“Hey I’m trying here okay.” He let out a soft sigh as he plopped down next to them on the bed. “I can stitch up gaping wounds in a matter of seconds, but for some reason,” He ran his fingers along Ellie’s hair with a chuckle, “I cannot seem to master the art of hair.”

Ellie let out another giggle and clapped her hands together. “Well daddy, Leanne can show you how to braid then!”

Ethan shook his head back and forth and chuckled again. “I don’t think there’s any teaching this daddy how to do anything of the sort.”

Leanne eyed him gently before separating out Ellie’s hair accordingly. “It really isn’t that hard Ethan.” She started braiding it softly, her hands working quickly to twist the girl’s hair around and around. He watched mesmerized by the sight in front of him and if his heart grew any larger he’d probably be a dead man. When Leanne was finished, she wrapped the little scrunchie around the end of the braid and patted Ellie’s hair softly. “All done.” She whispered, and when Ellie turned around Ethan did a double take. His baby girl looked all grown up, and in a matter of seconds at that.

“Wow baby, that looks really good.” He whispered softly, and he wasn’t entirely sure which of the two girls he was talking too in that moment.

Ellie smiled brightly up at them both and jumped off the bed to run to the mirror hanging on the closet door. She spun back and forth repeatedly, twisting her head this way and that, trying to make sure she saw it from every angle. She let out the biggest squee of delight Ethan had ever heard before jumping back onto the bed with them, her arms going around Leanne’s neck tightly, causing the woman to fall backward against the pillows.

“Thank you Leanne.” She whispered softly, and Ethan watched as Leanne hugged her back tightly, whispering a ‘you’re welcome’ against her chestnut locks. “Can we watch the movie now?” She asked as she pulled back, eyeing them both curiously.

“Sure thing pumpkin.” Ethan watched as Ellie gently untangled herself from Leanne’s arms and plopped herself down between them, her unicorn going back under her arm, her head settling down against the middle pillow. “What movie did you pick?”

“Secret Life of Pets.” He should’ve already known that answer. They had seen the movie probably a dozen times in the past 3 months, and while he was a fan, he would’ve appreciated something else for once.

Leanne let out a soft chuckle as she settled back against the pillow next to Ellie, her arms resting gently across her own chest, and Ethan thought that she looked like she belonged there. “I love that movie.” She whispered and Ellie’s face lit up as she snuggled closer.

“Of course you do.” Ethan whispered, his eyes connecting with hers for a brief second, the smile on her face doing things to his heart, and his whole body for that matter. She broke the trance when Ellie pressed play and he watched as her eyes set themselves on the screen of the large TV. He reached behind him and turned off the light before settling down on Ellie’s other side, his arm gently going around the girl’s shoulders to pull her close. She snuggled back against him, her arms staying wound around Leanne’s arm, and he finally felt his body relax for the first time in months.


	10. Primal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Here we have more adorableness. And a little more of Ethan not being able to keep his hands to himself.

Leanne had never felt as safe and secure and relaxed as she did laying there in bed with Ethan and Ellie, the sound coming from the TV calming her nerves. She wasn’t expecting this when she drove over her tonight. No, instead she had every intention of breaking things off with Ethan, their little ‘friends with benefits’ thing not doing it for her anymore. She wanted more. _She wanted it all. She wanted this._

But then she had thought about it all and it had felt like a dagger to the heart when she realized that Ethan most likely didn’t want her around after everything that she had done to him, and to Ellie. She had fallen for them both so hard and so fast and she didn’t know which way was up. And while she was enjoying the sex, I mean come on, who wouldn’t, she was having second thoughts about that part too. She didn’t want to be one of those women. She didn’t want to be a booty call anymore. She wanted to be his girl, his girlfriend, his woman. She wanted to be his best-friend again too. 

When she had arrived and found out that Ellie was there she was almost relieved. She had definitely missed the little girl, and when those arms had wrapped around her neck and that little face had smiled up at her, it had just confirmed everything she thought she was feeling. That this is where she wanted to be. She wanted things to be good, and simple, and she knew that that probably wouldn’t happen the way she imagined. Not with Ellie in the picture. Not with their history. But she was willing to give it a try.

“Penny for your thoughts.” She heard Ethan whisper, his hand trailing up and down her left arm gently. Ellie had fallen asleep about twenty minutes into the movie and he had gently moved her to sleep on his chest so that he could wrap his arm around Leanne’s shoulders. She had tucked herself against his side softly, her head moving to rest on his chest, her hand going out to rub the sleeping child’s back.

“Don’t think they’re worth that much.” She whispered back, moving her head so that she could look up at him. The movie had ended about thirty minutes ago and he had stopped the device, switching it from the next movie to a rerun of some old cop drama.

She eyed him sleepily, the light from the TV screen making him look a decade younger than he really was, and she smiled. He was the most handsome man she had ever seen and she had had a hard time keeping her eyes, and her hands, off of him since the day she met him. She couldn’t believe that she was laying here in his arms, staring at his dreamy face with what was probably the goofiest look on her face.

“I’m sure they are.” He dropped a kiss to her head and she shook it back and forth, resting her cheek back against the fabric of his shirt, her hand going to run over Ellie’s head softly. “You wanna talk about them?”

She shook head ‘no’ once more, and closed her eyes, letting her left leg drift slightly to rest over his. She heard him chuckle at her attempt to get closer to her and he tightened his grip on her shoulders before pressing another kiss to her hair.

They laid that way for a while, the cop drama ending and another one starting, before Ethan finally turned the TV off. Leanne felt him settle back against the pillows, his hands doing their best to pull the blankets up over the three of them. She had just started to doze off when she heard it, a soft whimper, and her eyes shot open. The sight in front of her broke her heart.

Ellie was resting against her father’s chest, with tears streaming down her face, her hand grabbing at her ear roughly, and she was shaking. Trembling even. And Leanne felt horrible. Reaching out, she rubbed the girl’s back as reassuringly as possible, but she knew it was doing no good. She got ready to speak when she heard Ethan’s quiet voice whisper into the dark.

“It’s okay baby.” Leanne watched as he dropped a kiss to her head, his hand moving to cradle her head against his chest with a soothing sound.

“It hurts daddy.” She whimpered again, and Leanne placed her hand gently against the girl’s forehead, taken aback by the warmth radiating from her skin. She looked up, eyeing Ethan cautiously and he nodded his head at her unspoken question. 

“I know baby.” Another kiss to the head and Ethan gently unwrapped his arm from around her so that he could focus on his daughter, and she found that she didn’t mind one bit.

“What can we do to help Ellie?” She felt herself whisper before she even knew what was happening. 

Ellie let out a soft sob and shrugged her shoulders as she moved to sit up in Ethan’s lap. Ethan did the same, leaning back against the headboard as he rubbed her arms gently. Moving to sit up, Leanne reached out and took the girl’s hands in hers, leaning to press a gentle kiss to her forehead. And then Ellie did something that Leanne wasn’t expecting at all, she reached for her.

Leanne turned to Ethan quickly, her eyes widening when she realized what was happening, but where she expected to find anger or hostility or hesitation, she only found love and acceptance and respect. She turned back to Ellie and reached forward to gather the young girl in her arms, tucking her against her chest with a soft sigh. Ellie tightened her arms around her waist and she felt her sigh softly as she tried to calm her sobs. She turned her attention back to Ethan who just offered her a soft smile, reaching out to rub her arm soothingly.

“Would a warm bath help El?” His voice was so calm that if Leanne hadn’t known any better she would’ve thought that he had been doing this for the past 6 years, not just the past 3 months.

Ellie nodded her head against Leanne’s chest and looked up at them both with the saddest eyes Leanne had ever seen. “Maybe.” She whispered, her arms releasing their grip around Leanne so that she could wipe her eyes with her palms.

Ethan nodded his head before swinging his legs around and planting them on the floor. He stood quietly and made his way to the bathroom without another sound, leaving the two of them sitting there in silence. She heard Ellie sniffle once more and Leanne reached down to brush her tears away, her hands settling on her little cheeks.

“Do you need anything else Ellie?” Her voice betrayed her attempt to stay strong and she hoped that the observant little girl didn’t know just how hard this was on her.

“No.” She whispered, dropping her head downward, another sob leaving her body. “I’m sorry I ruined yours and daddy’s night.” Leanne barely heard her but the girl’s words were like a knife to the heart and she fought back the tears in her own eyes.

“Oh baby girl.” Leanne reached down and lifted Ellie’s chin up gently so that she could look into her gray eyes. “You didn’t ruin our night at all. You hear me?” She nodded her head softly, but the sobs that were still leaving her body told Leanne a different story. She watched as the little girl shifted her eyes away from her to look down at her lap once more and she hated seeing her so upset. “Look at me sweetie.” Ellie brought her eyes back to Leanne’s and she offered her the best smile she could manage. “There is no place your daddy and I would rather be than right here with you.” 

She heard Ethan try to stifle his own sob from where he was standing in the hallway, but she chose to ignore him for the moment, her focus being the little girl in her arms. Ellie nodded her head slowly and sniffled once more before lifting her head to the man standing in the doorway. “Is my bath ready?” Her words were quiet and Leanne rubbed her back as they both awaited a response.

“Yeah pumpkin, your bath’s ready.” Ethan’s voice was quiet and Leanne could see him trembling.

She watched as Ellie slowly climbed out of the bed and padded her way down the hall. She stood up herself, moving to join them in the hallway, when Ethan’s hands stopped her at the doorway, his fingers gripping her hips tightly. He waited until he heard the bathroom door close and then his lips were on hers, hot and needy and Leanne felt something somewhere inside her explode with desire.

“We can’t Ethan.” She mumbled against his lips, his hands trailing under her t-shirt to cup her breast roughly. He ran a thumb along her nipple and when she felt his other hand push it’s way under her pajama bottoms she grabbed his collar and pushed him backward swiftly. “Stop Ethan!”

She watched as he tried to catch his breath, one shaky hand going to run through his hair as he turned his back to her, the other arm reaching out to grab the door frame. He turned back around after a second and she eyed him suspiciously as she waited for him to speak. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, and his eyes displayed just that. “I… I just…” He let out a sigh and he moved to sit on the edge of the bed, his hands reaching out for hers. She allowed him to take her hands and she turned herself so that she was facing him, her legs moving to stand between his knees. “Seeing you with her, like that…” He hung his head and shook it softly before lifting it up once more to look at her lovingly. “It just turned something on inside me. Something, I don’t know, something primal.” She let out a chuckle that she didn’t think he appreciated very much, but then there was a twinkle in his eyes and she could tell that he understood just how crazy he sounded. “Watching you take care of my daughter like that,” he whispered again, pulling her closer as he stood, his forehead going to hers, “it really fucking turned me on.”

She let out a soft gasp, her eyes closing at his words. But she didn’t have time to reply because then Ellie was screaming for them and they had both jumped apart faster than she thought possible. Both rushing to the young girl’s aide as fast as their trembling legs would carry them.


	11. Tease

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Okay so this chapter is probably one of my favorites. It’s hilarious fun between Ethan and Leanne. And there’s a little Ellie sweetness for good measure.  
> **Also, this is on the verge of mature, so please be warned.

That night had been almost two weeks ago and while Leanne had certainly enjoyed herself, she was still having a hard time wrapping her head around what was going on. She and Ethan had taken care of Ellie the rest of the night, the little girl having finally fallen asleep curled up in her own bed around 5:00am, and they had both been inclined to let her sleep as long as she wanted. Ethan had dragged her to bed with him, tucking her against his side with a soft sigh and about an hour later they both dozed off, their exhaustion taking over.

But then Leanne’s phone had rung and Campbell said it was important and she had kissed him sleepily before sneaking into the bathroom to get ready. She had dropped a kiss to Ellie’s head before leaving, and when Ethan walked her to do the door he had told her to come back when she got off. But she hadn’t. No, instead she had worked a 62 hour shift that most certainly would have been the death of her had it not been for coffee.

When her shift had finally ended she had gone straight to her house and fell asleep in her scrubs. She had awoken the next day to six missed calls from her frantic best-friend and about a dozen text messages of equal urgency. After reassuring him that she was fine, he had asked her to come back over for dinner, but she declined. But when Ellie had called her and asked for her personally, she couldn’t say ‘no’, and she had agreed to dinner and a movie on Friday night.

Of course, because work was work, she had to cancel on them. And then she had to cancel breakfast plans the following day. And a park trip the day after that. And she could tell with every text message that Ethan was getting just as frustrated with her as she was with Campbell. The bastard had to be doing this on purpose at this point. But alas, Leanne knew that wasn’t true, and until Ethan was finally back on a regular work schedule, life was just going to have to suck for the rest of them.

She had finally put her foot down though after having to cancel yet another night with her two favorite people and she told Campbell in no uncertain terms that he would be a dead man if he so much as texted her over the upcoming weekend. He had given her a look, but then he smiled, and she knew that he understood. She couldn’t wait to let Ethan, and Ellie, know that she was all theirs this weekend. She just hoped that they still wanted her to be there.

‘I have the entire weekend off. No ifs, ands, or buts. Campbell calls, he’s dead.’ She hit send to Ethan as she leaned back in her desk chair. She only had a few more files to complete before she was a free woman, and she couldn’t believe how long they were taking her.

‘The whole weekend?’ She smiled when she read the words he typed back.

‘The whole weekend.’ Dropping her phone onto the desk she returned her attention to the file in front of her, scribbling down her notes as she tried her best not to get distracted. She wondered if Ellie would be home tonight, or if she would be with her grandparents. Having Ethan all to herself for one night sure would be nice.

‘Ellie said that if you’re not here in time for dinner she’s coming to get you herself.’ Leanne laughed at Ethan’s use of emojis after his statement, and as much as she wanted a night alone with the man, she wanted to see his daughter just as much.

‘I’ll be there no later than 6.’ She hit send and when he replied immediately she shook her head at his words.

‘Bring a bag. You’re not allowed to leave all weekend.’ She couldn’t imagine what he possibly had up his sleeve, but it sent chills down her body just thinking about it.

‘Really now?’ Two could play at this game.

‘Ellie has already been promised a sleepover with Noa tomorrow night. So I have plans for us.’ And there it was. She knew exactly what those plans included, and she doubted that she would be wearing pants for any of them.

‘I don’t think I’ll need pants for those plans of yours Dr. Willis.’ The winky face she added made her laugh out loud and she couldn’t believe the conversation they were having right now. She wondered if this counted as sexting or not.

‘You have a dirty mind Dr. Rorish.’ She chuckled at his response, if only he knew. ‘I like it.’ Popped up next and she chocked back a growl. She didn’t know if she could make it until Saturday with him acting like that.

‘You’re the one who corrupted me. I wasn’t like this before you came around.’ True story.

‘Mission accomplished then.’ She wanted to smack him. He could be such a cocky asshole when he wanted to be. ‘Wear those lacy red panties I like so much.’ Now she really wanted to slap him. This most definitely counted as sexting, and if she didn’t stop now she was never going to finish her paperwork in time to go home and pack a bag.

‘I thought I didn’t need pants for this party, much less any panties.’ She was going to get him for this when she saw him again. 

‘Yes well, I simply enjoy taking those off of you my dear.’ She shook her head back and forth. This man was surely going to be the death of her.

‘Yes well, last time you tried to remove them with your teeth and I don’t recall that going very well.’ This was not how this conversation was supposed to go.

‘Turns out that my desire to bend you over the kitchen counter didn’t go as planned.’ She gasped, this man was ridiculous. Horny, and adorable, but ridiculous.

‘I can’t with you right now.’ She knew exactly what she could do with him right now. ‘You know what, yes, yes I can with you. But what I want involves no clothes and your bed and is most certainly meant for adult eyes only.’ She hit send before she could chicken out of this and she squirmed in her chair at the thought of him running his hands along her naked body. Dammit, she was officially never going to get any work done.

‘Woman!’ Was all he texted back and she let out a cackle. She knew just what he was thinking about now and she doubted that he was in a good place to be thinking about it either.

‘You started it.’ She was probably going to regret that text.

‘And after Ellie goes to bed tonight, I’m gonna finish it.’ Right in for the kill. Leanne squirmed again, the room now feeling much warmer than it had twenty minutes ago.

‘Promises promises.’ She was so going to get in trouble for this. And god, if anyone ever read these message, she’d be a dead woman.

‘You know what? Just for that, I’m not gonna finish it. I’m gonna get you all hot and bothered and wanting, and then I’m gonna leave you hanging.’ Well damn Ethan, that escalated quickly. Fine, she could fight fire with fire.

‘I’m not above finishing it myself then.’ She went for the kill and she wished she could see his face right now. She doubted it was very attractive looking.

‘Only if I get to watch.’ And that was it. She couldn’t handle this conversation anymore. Tossing her phone to the side she growled in frustration. It was only noon. How in the hell was she going to make it another 5 hours before she got out of this joint and then another hour before she got to see him. She wanted him now dammit.

Flipping over the phone she huffed when he didn’t say anything else. She tossed it back down again and went back to her paperwork. But then it dinged about 15 minutes later and she flipped it over anxiously, praying it was him. She smiled when she saw his name on the screen.

‘Bedtime cannot get here soon enough.’ Was all it said. She wondered in how many ways he meant those words. Probably more than one if she had to guess.

‘Tell me about it.’ She typed back, tossing the file she had just finished to the ground. She waited for him to text back, but he never did. And she went back to her paperwork, praying that she could get it done in the next 4.5 hours. She just wanted to see Ethan. She wanted to see him. She wanted his touch and his kiss and his smile. She wanted all of him almost as much as she needed him, and it was killing her.

——

Leanne had struggled through the rest of her reports and when she was finally finished she was thrilled to see that the clock read 4:30pm. Her desire to see Ethan must’ve been the push she needed to get through the stack of files because she didn’t even remember half of what she had just read. Throwing her stuff in her purse she had grabbed her keys and headed for the parking garage without so much as a goodbye to her co-workers. She was going to be damned if any of them stopped her from seeing her man.

She made it home in record time, throwing some stuff in her overnight bag and tossing her hair into a messy bun as she went. She didn’t care much what exactly she had packed at this point, just as long as she had some clean underwear and a pair of pants. Pulling her phone out of her pocket she shot Ethan a quick text to let him know that she was on her way over. She had struggled to lock the door behind her as her nerves started to get the best of her. She couldn’t get out of there fast enough.

Pulling into Ethan’s driveway about ten minutes later she let out a sigh at the sight of the little girl curled up on the porch swing, a book in her hands and her unicorn tucked against her side. Her little head popped up when she saw Leanne exit her car and she couldn’t help but smile as her brown eyes met the girl’s gray ones over the porch railing.

“Leanne!” She watched as Ellie tossed her book to the side, her unicorn falling to the wayside as well, as she took off running toward her. She had missed Ellie almost as much as she had missed Ethan and her heart swelled at the feeling of the girl’s arms around her neck.

“Hi Ellie.” She whispered, her arms wrapping around the child tightly. She watched as Ethan made his way to the front door, his eyes boring into hers from across the yard. She could almost feel his desire dripping off of him and as excited as it made her, the little girl in her arms took precedent right now.

“You’re early.” Ellie’s words were soft and when Leanne set her back down on the ground she couldn’t help but chuckle softly at her smile.

“Well I had some very important people to come see.” She lifted her eyes to catch Ethan’s gaze, but he had retreated back into the house without a sound.

“I’m glad you’re here.” The girl said softly, reaching up to pat Leanne’s cheek. “Daddy’s missed you.” She said softly. And Leanne wondered just how much the little girl understood about their relationship.

“Well I’ve certainly missed you both.” Her tone echoed the smile child’s and she couldn’t help but feel a little guilty. She hoped that Ellie didn’t feel like she was getting pushed aside during all of this. That was the last thing that Leanne wanted.

Ellie offered her a smile though that said differently, that said that she understood, and then she turned around and made her way back to her seat. She tucked her unicorn back against her hip and picked her book up without a sound, returning to her story with thoughtful eyes. Leanne could see every ounce of Ethan in her right then and there, and her heart was suddenly so full of love for them both. 

She quietly made her way inside, sweeping her eyes around the living room in hopes of spotting Ethan out in the open. But she had no such luck. _That little bastard was hiding from her._ And she knew exactly why.

“Ethan…” She called out softly, moving deeper into the house, her overnight bag falling softly to the floor. She received no answer though.

She checked the kitchen first, wondering if maybe he had started working on dinner a bit early, but she found the small room empty. Moving down the hallway she checked the office, empty as well, and she could tell that the bathroom would bare the same results. Then she noticed it. His bedroom door was closed. And she all of a sudden felt like she couldn’t breath. 

Reaching for the knob, she opened the door slowly, her eyes peering into the room, but she had no time to react because the next thing she knew her back was against the closed door and Ethan’s hands were on her hips, pinning her down softly.

“I’ve been trying to come up with ways to get back at you for earlier.” He whispered, his lips going to her neck as his hands made their way under her shirt, pushing her bra to the side as he ran his thumb along her nipple. “So far I haven’t thought of anything good though.” He moved his lips to hers, kissing her hard as he pressed her to the door with his hips, his other hand moving to slide beneath the waistband of her yoga pants.

“Is that so?” She whispered, her hands reaching around to cup his erection through his jeans. She felt like a horny teenager about to get it on with the quarter back under the bleachers. Ethan kissed her again, hard, and his tongue wasted no time running along her lips as he slid his fingers down through her curls. 

“You got me going you know?” He pulled back to eye her lustfully as he slid a finger inside her, and she couldn’t help the moan that left her mouth. “I haven’t been able to think straight all fucking day.” He growled, moving his lips to her ear where he nipped roughly, his finger stroking her in all the right ways.

She bucked against him, her hands going to roam over his back, pushing at his shirt roughly. She stopped when she heard the front door open and when Ethan pressed a finger to her lips to silence her she nipped at him playfully. They waited for a soft voice, but it never came. Instead the door opened and closed again quietly, and they both let out a breath.

“Sorry.” She wasn’t sorry, not at all, but then he slid another finger into her and kissed her roughly and she forgot all about their earlier conversation. She knew she wasn’t going to last long and she hated it. “That was never my intention.” She mouthed against his lips and when he ran his thumb over her core she kissed him hard to drown out her moans of pleasure.

“Sure it wasn’t.” He growled back, grinding his hips against hers. He kissed her hard one last time and then he pulled back, removing his fingers from within her and dropping his hand from her bare breast. He pushed back from her, ignoring her clawing hands, and leaned down to her ear where he whispered. “Minx.” And then he was gone. He disappeared through the door as quick as she had entered and that was it.

“Bastard.” She muttered under her breath, her hands going to adjust her bra back into place, smoothing her shirt down over it when she was done. She couldn’t believe him. He was going to pay for this.


	12. Late Nights

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Here’s a little more sassy Leanne/Ethan. And some more adorable Ellie!

Ethan had felt a wave of excitement rush over him after he had left Leanne hot and ready and begging for him. He had never done anything like this in his life and he swore to God that this woman was worth every damn second of torture that he was pointing himself through. After he had taken a few minutes to get himself back together he had emerged from the bathroom and started searching for her. He found her and Ellie outside, curled up together reading from the girl’s book, and he was almost angry at the fact that she didn’t look the least bit flustered.

“Hi ladies.” He said softly from his spot against the door frame. Ellie looked up and smiled, Leanne didn’t, her eyes staying glued to the page she was reading from. “Hungry?” He was praying for any kind of distraction right now. And what better way to keep himself busy than to cook dinner.

“Starving!” Ellie’s sweet voice replied. “Can we go out! I want Chinese!” _Dammit, the girl was on to them wasn’t she?_ He couldn’t imagine being out in public with Leanne right now. He couldn’t imagine having anyone else’s eyes look at her the way he was. He didn’t know if he could behave himself out there. 

But then she looked up at him with lustful eyes and he decided that it was safer out there than it was here. “Sure thing baby.” He offered them both a smile, which Ellie returned, and Leanne, yet again, didn’t. _She’s playing you buddy. Straight up playing you._ And it was fucking working too. “Why don’t you go put some shoes on princess?”

The little girl nodded her head before hopping up off the swing, making her way past him with a huge smile on her face. He heard the bathroom door shut as she went to get ready and he eyed Leanne deeply from across the porch. They stood that way for a minute, him eyeing her longingly, her eyeing him like she was going to set him on fire, literally and figuratively. When Ellie emerged a few minutes later Leanne stood and brushed past him, her hand grazing over the front of his jeans lightly as she made it through the door, and he couldn’t help the growl that left his throat. _Fuck he didn’t know what he was going to do._

“I’m going to put some real pants on.” She was joking, but dammit he didn’t want her too. He didn’t want her to put different pants on either. Because the way her ass looked in those things, well dammit he’d be lying if he didn’t say they were a perfect fit. He growled again as she winked at him from the bathroom before shutting the door behind her and he shook his head to erase the mental image of her now stripping said pants off.

“Daddy?” Ellie’s voice shook him from his thoughts and he looked down, eyeing the girl curiously from where she was seated on the floor, her hands working on the ties to her new tennis shoes. 

“Yes baby?” He offered her a soft smile, hoping that she wouldn’t notice just how off he was really feeling.

“Is Leanne gonna stay all weekend?” She had a hopeful look in her eyes and he was thankful that he wasn’t going to have to break her heart again, lying to her the past few weeks about Leanne being ‘busy’ was starting to hurt his heart. 

“I hope so.” He replied. And God did he really hope so. He got ready to reply when Leanne exited the bathroom, now wearing a pair of jeans, and he offered her a sly smile as he eyed her up and down. _Those jeans would work too._ His eyes caught hers when he finished his once over and he tried to convey his thoughts to her. The blush that came over her face said that she understood it all.

“Ready peanut?” Leanne’s voice was soft and the use of the nickname for his daughter made his heart tighten in his chest. This woman was going to kill him by weekend’s end.

“Sure thing!” The little girl jumped up excitedly and headed to the car, grabbing her book as she ran past the table. Ethan heard her enter the back seat all on her own and he chuckled at her excitement. Oh to be a kid again. But then Leanne was brushing past him and she ran her hand along his chest and he truly understood the excitement in his young daughter’s voice. 

——

They had arrived at their favorite Chinese restaurant within a few minutes and Ethan had escorted them both to booth in the back. He figured that Ellie would insist on sitting next to Leanne, but the girl had chosen the side across from her, forcing him to slide in next to the woman. _Dammit kid. You’re killing me here._

They had ordered their food and were chatting nicely when his entire world stopped as Leanne ran her hand up his thigh. He choked on his water and eyed her warningly from the side, but she didn’t seem to get his hint. Or she didn’t care. Because her hand went a little higher, and then it was on his crotch, and he decided that she was officially a dead woman. He excused himself to use the bathroom, glaring at her as he walked away. The smirk on her face said she knew exactly what she was doing to him. And that she didn’t give a damn how much it was messing with his head.

When he returned, he plopped down next to Ellie, declaring that he rarely got to sit next to the young girl when they ate. Ellie had just eyed him strangely before going back to coloring her placemat and when he looked up to eye Leanne he had to swallow back a growl. It sure was a good thing that his six year old didn’t know what lust looked like, because trying to explain the look in Leanne’s eyes to her might have been the most embarrassing thing he ever had to do as a father. 

Their food had arrived a few minutes later and they ate in a comfortable silence, Leanne shifting her eyes towards his as she licked some orange sauce off her lips. _Worst. Idea. Ever._ He shifted in his seat and coughed again, his eyes remaining on his food the rest of the meal. After they were done Ellie had insisted on ordering dessert, but Ethan convinced her that they had ice-cream at home she could eat. He was surprised how well that had gone over, but then he remembered that Leanne had once told Ellie that ice-cream was her favorite, and it all made sense to him. The little girl was trying to win over the woman just as much as he was. He wondered for a minute who was being more successful.

When they had finally made it back to the house Ellie had bounded down the hallway to get ready for bed, mumbling something about wanting to play a board game before the night was over. Ethan had dared a glance at Leanne when she let the words ‘Candy Land’ leave her mouth. Leanne had let out a chuckle that made his heart start to race. He had dropped to the couch while he waited for the tot, and that was his second mistake of the night. Because the next thing he knew, Leanne was moving to straddle him, her knees falling against his hips, her hands going to run across his chest.

“You thought you were going to get away with what you did earlier didn’t you?” Leanne’s voice was hot against his lips and he swallowed, closing his eyes tightly as she reached between them, her hand gripping him through his jeans once more.

He shook his head back and forth, holding his breath when he felt her undo his button, sliding his zipper down slowly. “I honestly have no idea what I was thinking.” He breathed out, his head falling back as she ran her hand down along his erection, gripping him gently.

“Obviously.” She growled, her lips going to his, kissing him roughly. She was running her tongue along the roof of his mouth, her hand moving up and down forcefully, when he heard the toilet flush in the other room. And before he could reply she was pulling her hand back, reaching down to zip and button his jeans back up. She stood slowly, eyeing him through her messy bangs before tossing him a pillow. “Might wanna cover that up.” She winked at him then and he wanted to die right there.

They had gotten through one round of ‘Candy Land’ when Ethan felt his phone buzz in his back pocket, pulling it out he eyed the name on the screen suspiciously before lifting his eyes to the woman sitting across from him. He didn’t know what kind of game she was playing, but he wanted out. 

_I haven’t showered yet today._ Or maybe he wanted in.

_And what’s that gotta do with me?_ He knew exactly where she was going with this. He wasn’t stupid.

_Maybe we could shower…_ And then nothing. He eyed her again, swallowing when he saw the smirk that came across her face. _Together._

God dammit he was going to get her for this. _Anything you want love._

_Anything?_ He felt her bare foot snake it’s way up his calf and he shuttered. He’d give her the whole damn world if it meant that she would stay right here with him, with them, for the rest of her life.

_Yes ma’am._ She winked at him when she read the text and he shook his head to clear his thoughts. 

“Daddy?” He was thankful for the little girl’s voice breaking him from his very dirty thoughts and he eyed her softly, watching as she let out a big yawn.

“Yeah El?” He wondered if she was ready for bed yet, considering it was nearing 9:00pm, which was normally about the time she crashed, regardless of how much fun she was having.

“I’m getting sleepy.” Her voice echoed what her words were saying and Ethan offered her a smile. “Can I go to bed now?”

Nodding his head Ethan let out a chuckle, his hands reaching out to ruffle the small girl’s hair. “Of course baby.”

She nodded her head in response and turned her attention toward the brunette sitting next to her, eyeing her cautiously as she spoke. “Will you tuck me in Leanne?”

And then all the air left his body. He saw the look that came across Leanne’s face and he felt his heart shatter. _So much for a delightful evening._ He knew that those words were all it would take for the woman to lock up on them both. As much as he loved his daughter, right now, he really didn’t like her timing.

“Sure thing honey.” Leanne’s words surprised him and he eyed her gently, doing his best to let her know that she didn’t have to do anything she wasn’t comfortable with.

“I’m gonna go brush my teeth first.” And with that the tot was off, skipping her way to the bathroom where she closed the door behind her. 

Ethan wanted to speak. He wanted to tell Leanne that she wasn’t obligated to tuck the girl in just because she asked. That she could leave and no one would say anything. He stood, moving to sit in Ellie’s abandoned chair, and reached out for his lover’s hands. 

“You don’t have to.” He whispered softly, squeezing her hands as he leaned forward to get a better look at her.

Leanne let out a soft sigh, lifting her head so that she could look him in the eyes. “I want too.” Her words were so quiet that he barely heard them, but the loving look in her eyes told him all he needed to know. She wanted this just as bad as he did, and she wasn’t just talking about the sex.

“Okay.” He leaned forward, kissing her forehead softly before pulling back to eye her. He watched as she blinked back the tears and he sighed. “We can talk about this if you want?” He didn’t want to push her, and he knew that talking about all of this was often what set her off. But when she nodded her head he felt butterflies in his stomach at the prospect of her finally confiding in him.

“Later.” She whispered, pulling back when she heard the bathroom door open behind them. He nodded his head as he watched her stand and when she took his daughter’s hand in hers, leading her toward the girl’s bedroom, he couldn’t help the tear that rolled down his cheek. _Yep, totally going to be the death of him._


	13. A Surprise Question

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Okay so Ethan and Leanne’s talk in this chapter breaks my heart. But I promise, there is a happy ending.  
> **Also, the last half of this chapter is **pure and utter smut**.  You have been warned!

Leanne had followed Ellie into her room and tucked her into bed with a kiss. But when she tried to leave, the child had grabbed her hand and asked her to sit with her until she was asleep. And as much as she had wanted to leave and get back to Ethan, she didn’t have the heart to say ‘no’. When she had emerged from the small room almost thirty minutes later she had wandered into the living room in such of the man, but he was nowhere to be found. Then she heard it, the creek of the porch swing outside, and she smiled softly at how domestic this whole evening had felt.

She made her way outside quietly, but not before grabbing the blanket off of the back of the couch as she passed by. Walking softly, she moved to settle herself against his side, bringing the blanket to wrap around her body tightly as she sat down. Ethan wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, his head dropping so that he could place a kiss against her temple. 

“Everything go okay?” His voice was soft in the stillness of the night and Leanne knew exactly what he meant. _Had she been okay with tucking his daughter into bed like she were her own child?_

“Yeah.” She replied quietly, leaning her head back against his shoulder and closing her eyes. She knew they needed to have this conversation, she just didn’t know how.

“Thank you for tonight Lea.” He dropped another kiss to her head, his arm tightening around her, and she felt the sigh that left his body with his next set of words. “I know this has been real hard on you.”

She nodded her head gently, her eyes squeezing tightly to keep back the flow of tears. “It’s surprisingly been easier than I thought it would be.” She whispered, turning to eye him over her shoulder. “I think that’s the part that’s scaring me the most.” She let out a soft sob and turned her attention back toward the other side of the porch, not wanting to meet his eyes.

“I get it,” Another kiss and another squeeze and Leanne was thankful that he was trying to soothe her, “I do. I mean, as much as someone who still has his whole world around can get it.” His words sent a shiver down her spine and she cuddled closer to him as another sob escaped her lips.

“Every time I…” She stopped, she couldn’t say the words that were on the tip of her tongue. She didn’t want to break his heart. She didn’t want him to look at his precious little girl as anything other than the adorable little angel that she was. She didn’t want him to start seeing a ghost every time he looked into her eyes. She didn’t want this for him. For either of them. It’s why she had tried to stay away.

“Shhhh.” He whispered softly, his hand reaching up to brush across her head. “It’s okay Leanne.” His words were so gentle and his hands were so reassuring that it broke her, right in two. “You can talk to me baby. It’s why I’m here.” She could barely hear him over the sound of her sobs, and when he pressed his lips to her head and let them linger, she felt her body go numb.

“I can’t…” She started to stand, but his strong arms stopped her, bringing her back down onto the swing with him. He placed his palms against her cheeks and lifted her head, bringing her eyes up to meet his and she swallowed hard. “I don’t know if I can do this Ethan. I don’t know if I can walk around and pretend like everything is fine.”

“Then don’t pretend Leanne.” His words hit her like a punch to the stomach. _Who was he to tell her not to pretend? What did he even mean by that?_ “Don’t pretend like this is anything other than what it is. You’re still you and I’m still me. Just there’s a kid involved. It doesn’t have to be any more complicated than that.”

“You don’t get it!” She didn’t mean for her words to come out as a shout, and by the look on his face, neither did he. This time she pulled herself free of his grasp and stood, letting the blanket fall around her feet as she moved to walk away from him. She started pacing, her eyes going to every surface but that of his handsome face. “You don’t understand how hard this is for me.”

She watched as Ethan leaned back against the swing and scrubbed his hands over his face before leaning forward and eyeing her softly. “Then help me understand Leanne. Explain to me how and why this is hurting you so much.” The patience in his tone was the last thing that Leanne expected and she wanted so desperately to be angry with him. She wanted to hate him. She didn’t want him to make this easy on her. Because if he did, than she had no excuse for why she was fighting it so damn hard.

“I miss them Ethan.” She choked out, her hands going to tangle in her hair as she let out another sob. “I miss them every fucking day and I feel like I should be over it by now. It’s been almost six years and yet…” She stopped, leaning her body over the porch railing as she stared out into the night. 

“It’s okay to miss them Lea.” His words were soft and when she felt his hands run up her back she couldn’t help the chills that went through her body. “There’s no timeline on grief babe.” He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind and dropped his head to her shoulder, pressing a gentle kiss to the exposed skin.

“But I shouldn’t still feel like this.” Another sob tore through her body and she wanted to shove him off. She wanted to push him away and run. To get in her car and drive home and never look back. But then he pressed another kiss to her shoulder and hugged her tightly and she just couldn’t make her feet move.

“It’s normal to miss them.” His soft voice broke through the silence and his breath was warm against her ear, the night air having gotten chilly around them. “I miss them for you.” He whispered, his lips brushing her ear as he pulled her closer.

Leanne turned around in his arms then, moving to rest her hands against his chest as she eyed him through her tears. “It’s not fair.” She choked out, dropping her head to his chest with a sob.

“No it certainly is not.” She heard the hesitation in his voice. The way his hands stilled against her back. And she knew what he was thinking without him having to say it. _But I’m thankful that it lead you to me._

“I just…” She sniffled again, reaching up to play with the collar of his shirt. “I miss everything. I miss them being babies, even though it’s been forever since they were babies. And I miss their smiles and their laughs and their cries. I miss being a mother more than I’ve ever missed anything in this world.” She was shaking at this point, her words coming out in muffled sobs, and she wondered if Ethan thought she was as big of a fucking mess as she felt. 

But if he thought those things he didn’t say them. Instead, he wrapped his arms around her tighter and held her close. He offered her soft hushes and he pressed kiss after kiss against her hair. They stood that way for a while, him comforting her in the only way he knew how. After a while she felt Ethan’s grip on her relax, and he gently pushed her back, bringing his eyes to meet with hers. The words that left his mouth next sent a shock down her spine.

“Lets have a baby.” Ethan’s words were soft as he pressed a kiss to Leanne’s temple. 

“Let’s, whaaat...?” Leanne did a double take, her eyes going wide as she pulled back, pressing her hands to her face. “We... what?”

Ethan let out a chuckle, his hands grabbing for her waist softly, his eyes glistening in the dim light of the porch.

Leanne was silent, she didn’t know what to say to that. _How in the world did he expect that to make things better._ “You’re fucking crazy.” 

Ethan’s eyes went wide at her words. “Come again?”

“You heard me!” She jabbed her finger into his chest, her eyes dark and devious. “You’re. Fucking. Crazy!” She punctuated each word with a jab to his chest.

“You can’t tell me you haven’t thought about it?” His question made her head spin and she dropped her arms to her side with a huff.

“I... I have no words right now Ethan.” She turned her back to him, crossing her arms over her chest. It’s not that she hadn’t thought about it, because she had. A lot. Especially over the last 2 months. But she couldn’t let him know that. She didn’t even know if it was even physically possible at this point. Much less if it was something she could mentally or emotionally handle. “I just can’t...”

“I mean...” Ethan exhaled sharply, his hands moving to run through his already messy hair. “I know it’s crazy. It’s a horrible idea.”

Leanne snapped her eyes back toward him, a look of confusion etched into her face. If the situation hadn’t been so awkward, she might’ve found Ethan’s babbling cute. “I wouldn’t say it’s a horrible idea...”

“I didn’t mean it in a bad way.” Again, he reached for her, his trembling hands landing on her hips softly. “I would love nothing more than to have a baby with you.”

His eyes were bright in the moon light and Leanne felt herself falling fast. Falling for him. For the idea of having a baby with him. “I don’t even think it’s possible anymore Ethan.”

“Wait...” Ethan pulled her close, his forehead falling to rest against hers. “Are you saying you’d think about it?”

Leanne took a deep breath and closed her eyes, her hands going to rest against his chest. “I’m saying that I wouldn’t turn the idea down.” She tangled her hands against the fabric of his t-shirt and dropped her head to his shoulder. “But I also don’t want you to get your hopes up about anything.”

Ethan dropped a kiss to her head as he wrapped his arms around her tightly. “I love you.” He whispered, his lips moving to rest against her ear.

Leanne didn’t know how to respond. Ethan’s words had knocked the proverbial wind out of her and now her world was spinning. There was no way this man: this good, decent, loving, adorable, perfect man, was in love with her. They weren’t even a couple. Hell, he’d never even taken her on a date. And yet here he was asking her to have a baby with him and telling her that he loved her.

“It’s okay you know.” He whispered against her ear, one hand going to cradle her head softly, the other rubbing down her back. “It’s okay if you can’t say it back.”

Leanne sniffled, her warm tears making a mess of Ethan’s shirt. “It’s not that I don’t...”

“I know.” Again, his voice was soft, and he pressed another kiss to her head.

She didn’t know what to say. She had no idea how he truly felt. _Was this just an attempt to get her in bed again? Did he just want another baby? Was he making a fool of her?_ Her brain hurt from all of the feelings and she just wanted to lay down. She felt him press another kiss to her head as his hands ran down her back. She waited for him to go further, to put his hands on her ass or to push her away and kiss her hard. But he didn’t. Instead he just stood there, holding her tightly against his chest. She didn’t deserve him or his love.

“Maybe I should go.” Her voice sounded foreign to her and when he sighed against her cheek she choked back another sob.

“I don’t want you to go babe.” His voice was soft and not what she expected. She expected him to yell at her, to get mad and push her away, but not this. “If you want to go, I won’t stop you.” He pulled away gently, lifting one hand to her chin and bringing hear tear filled eyes up to meet his. “But I really, really don’t want you to leave.” He kissed her then, gently and sweetly and she could feel his want and need as he moved his lips over hers.

“I’m sorry.” Leanne whispered, pulling away from him with a sigh. “I feel like I’m messing it all up.”

The soft chuckle that escaped Ethan’s lips made her heart flutter and when she looked into his eyes she was officially lost. “You’re not messing anything up love.” He dropped another kiss to her temple, his hands reaching up to cup her cheeks lightly, his thumbs brushing away her tears.

“I was expecting so much more out of this evening.” She knew her voice was lustful and she could feel her body responding to the way his lips tilted up slightly and his eyes darkened. 

“Really?” He ran his hands down her arms before placing them softly on her hips. “What exactly were you expecting to happen tonight?” His voice was low, but she could hear the flirtatious tone and when he pulled her flush against him, she could feel the heat radiating off of his body.

“Well I did wear those red panties that you like so much.” She batted her eyelashes and dropped her hands from around his shoulders and ran them down his chest, stopping when she got to his belt buckle. She felt him shudder under her fingertips and it gave her chills knowing that she had such an effect on him. And she was only using her words, she couldn’t imagine what would happen when she finally got her hands on him.

“You know you’re absolutely crazy right?” Ethan growled, his head moving to press kisses to the exposed skin at her neck. His hands gripped her hips as he backed her against the porch railing and Leanne couldn’t help but smile when he let out a low growl.

“You made me this way.” She growled back, her hands going to run under his t-shirt. “I’ve never been much for all this...”

“All what...?” Ethan ran his tongue along her pulse point and when he bit down just above her collar bone she let out a sigh, her head tilting back even further to give him better access. 

“I’ve never been so...” She ran her hands back down to his waist, undoing his belt with shaky fingers.

“So what...?” She huffed and when he smirked against her neck she let out a low growl. “So hot? So turned on?” He whispered softly, kissing his way up toward her jaw in between his words.

She removed her hands from his belt buckle, leaving it to dangle inside the belt loops of his jeans, and grabbed his cheeks forcefully, crashing their lips together. “So horny.” She mouthed against him, and when his eyes went wide she let out a chuckle, kissing him hard.

“Well I’m glad to know that I have that effect on you.” He whispered, his teeth pulling at her bottom lip gently as his hands pushed their way up her shirt. 

“I’m normally so calm and cool and collected. And yet...” She was rambling now, but her mind couldn’t function fully with his hands running over the bare skin on her stomach. He was driving her insane and all he did was kiss her. She needed to grip on reality, and fast.

“And yet when you get around me...” He ground his hips against hers, his mouth returning to its spot against her neck as her head fell backward with a moan. “You fall apart?” His words where sharp and when his fingers ran just under the waistband of her jeans she decided she had had enough of his teasing.

“Yes well...” She grabbed at his hips again, her fingers working their way toward undoing his button. “You should stop being so fucking sexy.” She growled, her lips nipping at his ear hungrily.

Ethan let out a whimper when she slid a hand inside his jeans and boxers, wrapping her hand tightly around his erection. “You wanna talk about sexy...” His voice was barely audible and when his hands ran upward and over her bra, pushing the material aside, Leanne bucked her hips against his roughly.

Leanne couldn’t think straight as Ethan’s hands ran along her breasts. And when she sped up the movement of the hand that was gripping his erection tightly she heard him cuss under his breath, his head moving back up so that it was level with hers. She got ready to speak when he kissed her, hard, and when his tongue ran along her lips begging for entrance she quickly gave way. He ran his thumbs along her nipples then, groaning into the kiss as she slowed her movements once more, not wanting this to all be over before it even started. 

“We should go inside.” She whispered breathlessly as she pulled back to rest her forehead against his.

“Why?” He asked, his hands leaving her chest as they roamed over her stomach. She shivered when she felt the cold air hit her exposed skin and she reached up with her free hand to run her fingers through his messy hair. “Could take you right here.” He grumbled, his forehead leaving hers so that he could press sloppy kisses to her chin and neck.

“Having sex on the porch isn’t on my bucket list Ethan.” She grumbled back, pulling his head back up to her, kissing him softly. “I much prefer softer surfaces.” Her voice was soft and when he dipped his hands into her underwear, running a finger over her core slowly, she thought she might come right then and there.

“Spoil sport.” He growled against her lips. He moved his hands then to her hips, before pulling back slowly. She whimpered at the loss of contact but when she saw the smirk that came over his face she knew he was a dead man.

“And where are you going?” She reached out for him with shaky hands, her breathing ragged as she tried to calm herself down. She couldn’t believe this. _This was just like him to get her going and then walk away. Fuck._

“You said…” The glint in his eyes was just enough to cause Leanne to let out a whimper of her own and she finally got her hands to him, grabbing at his t-shirt roughly as she slammed her lips against his, backing him against the front door with a thud.

“I said we weren’t going to have sex on the porch.” She grunted against his lips. She tangled one hand in his hair while the other returned to its spot around his erection. “I said nothing about doing other things on the porch.” 

The growl that Ethan let out was predatory and she felt his hands grip her hips roughly as he spun them around, slamming her back against the door. “I don’t wanna do other things.” He tugged on her lip with his teeth and when she saw the look in his eyes she felt her resolve crumble around her.

“What do you want then Ethan?” She growled back, tugging on his member while she ran a finger down his face, hooking it around his dog-tag chain as she pulled him closer. 

“I want to take you right here against this goddamn door.” His voice was rough and Leanne could see his need in his eyes. She never thought Ethan would be that kind of guy, and she wondered for a split second if he really was, or if it was just her that had that affect on him. “Don’t give a fuck about the other shit.” His words normally would’ve caused her to want to rinse his mouth out with soap. However, there was something about the tone of his voice, paired with the feeling of his hands against her hips that turned her on even more.

“Do it then.” She whispered back, before her brain could catch up to her words, and once she had uttered them she knew she could never take them back. His eyes snapped up to meet hers and she released him slowly, moving her hands to push at the waistband of her own jeans. She stopped only when he grabbed her hands tightly in his, a soft grunt leaving his lips as he pulled back slightly.

“Fuck woman.” His voice was low and needy and when his hands reached for her belt buckle she let out a chuckle at his frantic movements. Stilling his hands she quickly made work of the object, undoing her button and sliding her zipper down as well. His hands pushed at hers again and she moved them back to him, running them up and along his back until she settled them in his hair. She whimpered when he pushed her pants down slightly, his mouth going to her neck as he ran a finger under the waistband of her panties. “This is a different pair.” He grumbled, moving to slid that same finger inside her with ease.

“Yeah well…” She was having a really hard time concentrating at this point and she wasn’t a hundred percent certain that her words were even making sense anymore. She gripped at his hair roughly as he pushed against her with his hips, his erection rubbing against her core through her underwear. “You ripped the last pair remember?” She tugged on his hair gently when he chuckled against her shoulder and when he moved his head up to hers she kissed him roughly. She felt his fingers slide out of her and the loss of contact made her ache in ways she never thought possible. 

“Oops.” His voice was the complete opposite of apologetic and when he gently pushed her panties down just enough to expose her she let out a moan that made him smile. He pressed against her once more as he moved his hands to her ass, lifting her up with ease. She wrapped her legs around his waist tightly, growling when he slid into her as she did so.

She knew it wouldn’t take long for her to come, their foreplay that had started much earlier in the day already enough to do her in, but she didn’t want him to think she wasn’t enjoying it. Because goddamn it she really was. She pulled him in for another kiss, her tongue running along his lips as he thrust into her quickly. He had one hand still pressed against her ass, ensuring that she didn’t fall, while the other made it’s way back under her shirt. He pushed her bra aside once more and grabbed at her breast roughly, his thumb rubbing along her already peaked nipple with ease.

“The bra matches.” She whispered, one of her hands going to his chest as she gained enough leverage to lean back. She saw his eyes darken even more and when he roughly pulled her t-shirt up she let out a shiver, whether from the cold or the lust, she wasn’t entirely sure.

He crashed his lips against hers once more as he picked up the pace. “Can’t.” He growled against her lips, his hands grabbing and caressing at every surface of bare skin they could find. “Fucking.” He thrust harder this time, offering her an almost apologetic look when she whimpered at the force. “Believe.” He pressed another kiss to her lips, his hand moving to settle itself between them, running it along her bare thigh. “It took us.” Another thrust, and this time his thumb found her core. She threw her head back against the doorframe with a whimper and grabbed at his hair with every once of control she could muster. “So.” Another thrust. “Fucking.” And another. “Long.” And another, and this one, did her in.

She felt herself tighten around him and she dragged his mouth back to hers forcefully, kissing him hard to drown out the screams in the back of her throat. The last thing either of them needed was Ellie, or a neighbor, hearing them in the throws of their encounter. He kissed her back, hard, as he thrust a few more times, growling against her lips when he came inside her. She tangled her hands through his hair, whimpering as he dropped his hand from between them before pulling himself back. She watched as he quickly pulled his pants back up, buttoning the button with trembling hands. She wondered if he was going to just walk away, leave her standing there like some two dollar whore. But then he reached down and scooped her up, grabbing the front door with one hand and yanking it open, the other settling between her legs. 

He carried her inside quietly, shutting the door behind him with his foot, clicking the lock down with his free hand. She whimpered when he slid a finger into her, and she slapped at him when he chuckled at her. “Shhhh.” He commanded, carrying her through the dark house and into the bedroom. He deposited her onto the bed with a gentle thud, and settled himself between her legs, his finger never leaving its place inside her core. He leaned up then, kissing her softly, and she felt her legs fall down as he added another finger, his thumb stroking her gently while he moved his fingers in and out. She noticed that somewhere along the way she had lost her pants and underwear and she prayed that they had at least made it into the bedroom with them.

“Ethan please…” She grabbed at him this time, roughly undoing his button and shoving his pants down with her shaky hands. She reached for him but he batted her hands away with his free one before reaching up to shove her shirt upward. She knew exactly what that meant and with one swift motion she tossed her shirt over her head, dropping her hands to his waist in hopes of doing the same to him. 

Ethan let out a growl as he ran his free hand over the disheveled bra she was wearing and she bucked her hips at his movements. Sitting up some, Leanne reached behind her, undoing the clasp of the garment with ease, and when it fell from her body she saw Ethan’s eyes widen. She honestly found it amazing that he was still so turned on by the sight of her bare chest, even after all of the nights that he had seen it. He leaned forward then, gently pushing her body back toward the bed as he hovered over her. He kissed her, softly at first, deepening it as he slowed the motion of his fingers that were resting between her legs. She let out a whimper and when he chuckled against her lips she dragged her nails down his back, gripping his shirt hem tightly in her fingers. She yanked upward, growling when he refused to pull back and when he stopped his movements against her core all together she bit his lip gently. 

“Don’t stop.” She whimpered, pulling back to eye him lustfully. “Please.”

Ethan just chuckled again and shook his head before dropping it to her chest. He ran his tongue along her breast, nipping roughly at her nipple before moving to do the same to the other one. He removed one finger from inside her and she clawed at his back like a wild animal. _She was going to fucking kill him later for his._ He moved his head lower this time, sliding the other finger out, and she slammed one closed fist against the mattress, causing him to chuckle against her belly button. He pressed kisses along her stomach as his thumb continued it’s ministrations against her core and when he settled his head between her legs she dropped both her hands to her sides and gripped the sheets tightly. 

They had never done anything other than straight up sex before and her mind had been reeling at the thought of what that gorgeous mouth of his could do to her if given the opportunity. She felt him kiss along her thigh, his breath warm against her core and she closed her eyes shut tightly as he moved his mouth upward to meet his thumb. She couldn’t believe this was happening. _This man was truly going to be the death of her._ It didn’t take him long to bring her back to the edge, and when he pulled back and started kissing his way back up her body she felt every fiber of her being shake with need. She tugged at him hungrily, pulling his head up to hers and when he slid into her without warning she let out a gasp, her hands gripping at him passionately. He dropped his head to her shoulder, kissing her sweat soaked skin tenderly as he thrust into her, picking up the pace when he could tell they were both close. She locked her legs around his waist, pushing him as close to her as possible and when she felt him come within her she lost what little bit of control she had left in her. She bit her lip to keep her screams back, but when he whimpered her name against her clavicle, his hand tightening around her hip as his orgasm racked his body, she couldn’t help but let out a whimper. 

Ethan relaxed himself above her a minute later, and when he pulled back to drop lazy kisses against her chest she offered him a smile, which he quickly returned. “Love you.” He whispered, his hand moving to tangle in her hair, his lips soft against her neck. “Love you so goddamn much.” 

She felt her heart clench at his words and when she felt the first tear hit her cheek she wanted to run. She couldn’t say it back to him. _There was no way._ And she felt like she was betraying him somehow. She expected him to pull away from her when she didn’t speak up, but instead he kissed her shoulder softly before pulling from within her. He pushed himself up on both hands and knees and offered her a sleepy smile. “Let’s shower.” He whispered, his finger trailing along her shoulder and down her chest, stopping just below her right breast, above the scar from the chest tube that saved her life so many years ago. 

She couldn’t speak, so she settled for shaking her head. She sat up then, moving to sit on the edge of the bed after he stood, pulling his boxers back up to cover himself some. She watched as he reached down and removed his shirt quickly, reaching out to place it over her naked body softly. The look she saw in his eyes brought about a new round of fears and she shivered at the protectiveness she saw there. _This is mine,_ was written all over his face and she didn’t know how exactly she should feel.

He took her hand gently then, pulling her up so that she was standing in front of him, and when he reached a hand out and brushed her hair back some she felt like her world was closing in around her. He leaned forward, pressing a kiss against her head, his whispered words setting her heart at ease. “I know love.” She didn’t know why what he said calmed her so much. Maybe because she believed him. Maybe because she thought that he could possibly mean what he was saying to her. Either way, she trusted him, and in that moment, she may have even loved him.


	14. Staying In

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Here’s another adorable chapter featuring our two favorite lovebirds (plus some adorable bed-head wearing Ellie).

Ethan woke up the next morning to what could’ve possibly been the most adorable sound he’d ever heard in his entire life: giggling. And not just any giggling, but full on, whole body, trying to remain quiet giggling. When he cracked his eyes open a few minutes later he was greeted with a sight that he never thought he’d be lucky enough to see, not in a million years. Ellie had crawled into his bed at some point and was now snuggled against Leanne’s chest, one arm wrapped tightly around her stuffed unicorn, the other resting on top of Leanne’s free arm, her little fingers rubbing up and down the woman’s arm slowly. Leanne’s arms were around the little girl, hugging her tightly to her, and her head was resting on top of the small girl’s chestnut curls. They were watching something on the TV, and judging by the sounds of laughter that continued to leave their lips, it must’ve been funny. He felt his heart swell when Leanne leaned forward and dropped a kiss to the child’s head, her eyes shining in the early morning light. If Ethan hadn’t loved her before, he sure as hell loved her now.

“You girl’s having fun over there?” He whispered, reaching out to run a hand down Leanne’s arm. He was glad that they had both decided to put clothes back on before climbing into bed last night. He didn’t even want to imagine what it would have been like trying to explain to his 6 year old why they were both naked in bed.

“Hi daddy.” Ellie’s voice was quiet and he could still hear the sleepy tone she got in the early hours. He eyed her softly as she snuggled against Leanne some more and if hadn’t known any better he’d swore his lover was responsible for half of his daughter’s DNA. 

“Morning.” Leanne’s soft voice brought him out of his thoughts and he looked down at her with soft eyes. When his gray met her hazel he felt his heart stop in his chest. _Goddamn this woman had a hold on his heartstrings._

Ethan knew it had been insane to bring up the whole baby thing last night. He honestly didn’t even know where the idea had come from. But then it had slipped out and he was asking her about having a baby with him before he even knew what was happening. _It had been downright insane._ And yet, he couldn’t stop thinking about it. He couldn’t stop imagining the sight of Leanne pregnant with their child. He couldn’t stop thinking about holding their son or daughter for the first time. The late nights, the firsts, everything in between. He couldn’t get it out of his head. As much as he loved Ellie, and boy did he love that kid, he had missed all of those steps with her. And he hated himself for it. He wanted a second chance at that, and wanted Leanne to experience it all again too. _But again, it was an insane idea._

“Can we have pancakes for breakfast daddy?” The little girl’s voice brought Ethan out of his thoughts once more and he eyed her as she lifted herself up to look at him with sleepy eyes.

“Sure thing baby.” He replied, reaching out to brush back some of her frantic hair. “You want chocolate chips or blueberries?”

Ellie placed her index finger against her nose and tapped gently, eyeing him with curious eyes before she shifted her gaze to the woman laying between them. “What do you want Leanne?”

Leanne’s eyes lit up at the girl’s question and she let out a chuckle. “How about chocolate chips?”

“Good choice!” Ellie threw her arms around the woman’s neck and plopped back down against her, the biggest smile lighting up her little face. “Daddy we want chocolate chip pancakes!” Her deceleration caused Leanne to laugh and when she turned her gaze toward him he couldn’t help but smile at the glint in her eyes.

“I’ll get right on that.” He whispered, leaning down to kiss Leanne softly, his hand ruffling the hair on his daughter’s head. He watched as Ellie smiled, turning her attention back to the TV program she had been watching so intently before and he used the distraction to his advantage. He dropped another kiss to Leanne’s shoulder and whispered against her ear. “I’m glad you’re here.”

She offered him a soft smile, her free hand reaching out to rub along his stubble covered cheek. “Me too.” She whispered, and Ethan felt his heart falling.

Offering her a gentle smile, Ethan reached out and cupped her cheek gently, turning her head toward him fully. “I love you.” He whispered, pressing his forehead to hers. The tears in her eyes made him choke back a sob. He hated that this was so hard for her. He hated that she was being pulled in a hundred different directions at once. He hated that he was the one doing most of the pulling.

“I know Ethan.” She whispered back, pressing a kiss to his lips lightly. “I know.”

He pulled back once more, eyeing the little girl beside her with curious eyes. If she noticed the exchange between the two adults, she didn’t seem phased by it, for which he was thankful. Dropping another kiss to Leanne’s lips he slowly rolled himself out of the bed and made his way into the kitchen. He knew that those chocolate chip pancakes were a sought after item and he didn’t dare not deliver.

——

The trio had eaten breakfast in a comfortable silence, save for Ellie’s giggles as she got powdered sugar all over her nose. The rest of the morning had followed much the same, comfortable, but quiet. They had each taken their respective time to get ready, and Ellie had spent most of the day tucked to Leanne’s side. She had asked for her to color with her, and then they had gone for a walk together around the block. She had even asked for Leanne to paint her toenails, much to Ethan’s amusement. Ellie had even helped Leanne make lunch and had then cuddled up with her afterward, claiming she needed a nap. Ethan had loved having them both together all day, and while he was excited for a night alone with Leanne, he sure was going to miss their interaction while Ellie was gone.

Noa had come around 4:00pm to pick Ellie up, claiming that she had a special surprise for her. Ethan had a strange feeling that surprise included a happy meal and a night of torturing Mario with board games and Disney Junior shows. Ellie didn’t seem to care though and Ethan was thankful that she had the younger couple in her life too. He knew they were probably a lot more fun than he and Leanne were in their old age. His daughter had laughed excruciatingly loud at that comment and Noa had just rolled her eyes, pushing him away and telling him to leave, that he was probably overdue for bed anyway. He had joined Leanne on the porch and they had waved goodbye to the girl with smiles on their faces. 

That had been almost an hour ago and Ethan thought that the house was disturbingly quiet without the sounds of little feet and giggles filling the small space. He had retreated to his office to work while Leanne had settled on the couch with a book, and while he had many other things on his mind regarding the brunette woman, he wasn’t about to overstep any boundaries after last night. And this morning. He didn’t want to pull her any further apart than he already was.

“You hungry?” He heard her soft voice filter through the small space of his office and when he looked up he was greeted with what was possibly the softest, yet sexiest, sight he had ever seen. She was leaning against the door frame, clad in sweatpants and a tank-top, his Dodger’s hoodie hanging loosely around her shoulders and arms. She had pulled her hair up into a bun while cooking lunch earlier and there it had stayed, a few pieces having fallen out to frame her beautiful face. Her glasses were perched on her nose and she had the sweetest smile on her lips. She looked like the most domesticated angel he had ever seen and he was so fucking in love with her that it hurt.

“Getting there.” He replied, standing to make his way toward her. When he stopped in front of her he offered her a smile, his hands reaching out to brush back some of her loose curls. He loved it when she wore it like this. “What did you have in mind?” He licked his lips, he certainly knew what he was hungry for now.

Rolling her eyes Leanne reached forward, brushing her fingers across his chest lightly. “I was hoping we could stay in.” The lust in her voice was unmistakable and when her eyes got dark behind the lenses of her glasses he let out a low moan, his fingers making their way down her neck slowly, running along her exposed collar bones.

“Good idea.” His fingers ran under the strap of her tank top, trailing down her chest to stop right above her bra. He backed her against the open door frame, pressing his lips against hers tightly. The moan she let out made him chuckle and he couldn’t help but tug on her bottom lip with his teeth. He let his other hand settle against her hip as she tugged on his t-shirt tightly, her hands slipping underneath to run across his abs. 

She let out a low growl when his hand moved away from her chest, his fingers curling themselves around her neck as he deepened the kiss. Grinding her hips against his, she reached around to trail her fingertips up his back and then down again. He moaned, his hand tightening its hold around her hip. “Bedroom?” She whispered against his mouth, her eyes closing for a brief second as he dropped kisses to her neck. He simply nodded his head as he pulled away enough for her to step forward. Taking his hand gently, she led him down the hall with a sly smile on her lips, the bedroom door closing behind them quietly. 

——

They had made love for what felt like hours, both relishing in the fact that they didn’t have to be quiet, or quick. Afterward, Ethan had dragged them to the bathroom to shower, where his lips did more work than his hands, and then some. Leanne felt like she was using him, but she just couldn’t stop herself. And while the sex was great, she knew that she needed to talk to him. She knew that she needed to address the issues between them. That this back and forth couldn’t continue. She wanted more, so much more, and if he was willing to let her in, then dammit she wanted in.

“Can we talk about something?” She whispered, her hand tangling against the blanket resting over them. She could still hear his heart trying to catch up after their evening activities and the feeling of his warm skin against her cheek made her wonder if this was all just a really good dream.

“Hmm…” His questioning tone was quiet in the dark bedroom, his fingers continuing to rub gentle circles against her bare hip. She was thankful she had opted for just pulling his t-shirt on with her underwear.

“Ethan…?” She pulled back slightly, bringing her arms to rest under her head as she turned her face toward him. 

“Leanne…?” He dragged out her name in what she figured was supposed to be an aggravated tone, instead it sounded sexy, and she had to close her eyes for a brief second in order to calm her nerves.

“I’m serious.” She reached up, running her fingers along his jaw. She could tell he still had his eyes closed, and judging by the relaxed state of his body, he was probably on his way toward sleep. “I wanna talk about something.”

“Can it wait?” He whispered, his fingers stilling against her hip as he turned his face down to look at her, his gray eyes shining back at her. “As much as I love talking to you, my brain is a little…” He offered her a sloppy smile, his other hand reaching up to brush her damp curls away from her face. “Well my brain is mush.”

Chuckling, she tugged on his jaw gently, bringing his head down so that she could press a kiss to his soft lips. When he smiled against her mouth, his one hand tangling in her hair while the other ran up her side, she could practically feel her brain melting as well. 

“You promise we’ll talk tomorrow?” Her voice was quiet as she dropped her head back against his chest. She felt his fingers tighten around her waist as he pressed a kiss to her head.

“Promise love.” Another kiss and another squeeze and then she felt him go lax beneath her, his breath sounds evening out. Smiling softly to herself, she draped her arm back across his stomach and snuggled herself even closer. _She could definitely get used to falling asleep like this._


	15. Wanting More

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *This chapter is pretty intense. There’s some **smut** , so you have been warned. There’s also a really intense talk and a little fighting as well. I hope you guys enjoy!

The next morning Leanne had woken up to an empty bed, and while she thought that she would ultimately be disappointed at that feeling, she surprisingly was at peace. She laid there quietly for a few minutes, listening to sounds of the rain outside hitting the side of the house lightly. _What a perfect day to lay in bed and do nothing?_ And yet, the person with whom she wanted to be sharing the bed with, was gone. Groaning softly, she rolled herself into a sitting position, shifting her eyes toward the clock on the bedside table. 9:45 glared back at her and she couldn’t remember the last time that she had slept in that late, unless of course it was because she hadn’t gone to bed until 3 or 4 in the morning. Sighing, she ran her fingers through her hair as she climbed out of bed, her feet hitting the hardwood floor with a light thud.

She made her way into the hallway quietly, smiling when she could hear the sounds of an old Beach Boys song echoing from the kitchen. She stepped into the bathroom quietly, using the restroom and splashing some cold water on her face before exiting, making her way toward the back room. The sight in front of her gave her butterflies in her stomach, and she couldn’t help but stand back and watch.

Ethan Willis stood in front of her, clad in only a pair of flannel pajama pants, his bed head just as atrocious as ever. And he was the cutest damn thing she had ever seen in her entire life. She watched as he continued his movements, flipping pancakes with one hand and pushing around what looked like bacon with the other. He was singing along to the song, and while she wasn’t entirely sure what exactly he was singing, it was the most delicious sound she had ever heard.

“I was gonna surprise you with breakfast in bed.” His tone was humorous and she wondered how in the hell he knew that she was there. 

“Sorry.” She whispered, smiling at him when he turned to look at her, his eyes soft in the low light of the small room. “I was afraid you had run off.”

He chuckled, plucking the last of the bacon out of the pan and placing it on a plate. He turned the burners off, moving to place the rest of the pancakes on the two plates next to him as well. “Never.” His tone was soft and when he looked up briefly, she caught a glimmer of something playful in his eyes, mixed with something that looked a lot like love. Offering him a gentle smile she moved forward, reaching out for a plate, but he just shook his head back and forth with a laugh. “No ma’am. I set out to provide my woman with breakfast in bed.” His eyes were teasing and his smile was relaxed and she just wanted to melt into those sexy bare arms right then and there. “Go…” He extended his hand outward, pointing back toward the room, and she heard him let out another chuckle when she turned with a huff, making her way back toward the room with quick steps.

Plopping down onto the soft mattress, she situated herself back against the pillows, pulling the warm blanket up to cover her bare legs. She swallowed and shook her head at his goofiness, she couldn’t believe he had just made her get back in bed to eat. “I’m ready Ethan.” She called and she heard him let out another laugh from down the hall. Why this man found her so funny she would never understand.

He appeared a minute later, a plate in each hand and he smiled at her as he placed one of them in her open arms. “Your breakfast, my dear.” She could hear the sarcasm dripping in his voice and she felt kind of bad for ruining his surprise. _Dammit, if she had only waited another five minutes._

“I’m sorry for ruining your surprise Ethan.” She whispered as he climbed into the space next to her, leaning back against the pillows with a soft sigh. She really did feel horrible for starting his morning off on the wrong foot.

“It’s fine Leanne.” She couldn’t tell if he was mad or indifferent, but her self-confidence was low enough to make her think he was probably mad. She felt his free hand reach out and pat her bare thigh below the blanket and she turned her gaze away from him, focusing her eyes on the plate in her hands. “Really Leanne.” He reached out and rubbed his knuckles along her cheek softly, his tone low as he nudged her gently with his shoulder. “I was just joking.”

“Okay.” She replied softly, reaching down to pick up her fork with her other hand, stabbing at her pancakes quietly. She heard him let out another sigh as he withdrew his hand from her cheek, turning his full attention back toward his plate. 

They sat and ate in silence, Leanne thankful that he was letting her have a minute. After they had each finished, Ethan took her plate from her without a word and she watched as he made his way out of the room. She heard him turn the sink on, the sounds of his phone’s music echoing through the house once more. She sighed, leaning her head back against the head board as she fought off the desire to cry. _Why did they have to do this to each other? Why was it always so push and pull with them?_

Sighing, she slowly rose from the bed once more and quietly made her way back toward the kitchen. She watched from the doorway for a minute, trying to gauge Ethan’s state of mind before entering, but when he reached out toward her, a dry dish towel in his hand, she felt her racing heart ease a little. Taking the rag she quietly stepped into the room and took her place next to his side, drying the dishes he handed her with ease. That was until he dropped soap bubbles on her head, and that was the end of the niceness.

“You jerk.” She playfully shouted, pushing away from him as he came after her with bubble covered hands. He chased her around the small room before she darted past him, out into the living room, yelping as he smeared bubbles on her cheek as she passed him. “Stop!” She knew her words would do little to deter him, and judging by the playful look in his eyes he was nowhere close to being done with her.

“Come back!” His tone was humorous and while Leanne wasn’t sure where this side of him had come from, and if she even liked this side of him, she decided to play along. 

Stopping dead in her tracks in the middle of the living room she did the only thing she could think of to stop him from moving any further forward. Reaching down, she grabbed the hem of the shirt she was wearing and pulled it up and over her head in one swift move. _And it worked._ Ethan stopped so fast that he nearly fell forward, his eyes going wide at the sight of her standing in his living room in nothing but a pair of lacy black panties.

“Not fair.” He growled, rubbing the few remaining bubbles on his hands off and onto his pants, his legs carrying him the last few feet between them. His damp hands went straight to her hips and he pulled her flush against him roughly. She felt his lips hit her neck as he slowly backed her up toward the couch, and when she let out a squeal as she fell backward he chuckled against her skin.

His head moved from her neck down to her chest, where he pressed feather light kisses to her collar bones before moving downward. “You have to admit,” She let out a gasp as he took one nipple in his mouth, swirling his tongue around slowly, his hands still pinning her almost naked body down against the material of the couch, “my strategy was impressive.”

“Evil.” He mouthed, moving his head so that he could run his tongue along the other breast, his fingers hooking under the material of her panties, sliding them down slowly as he kissed his way down her stomach. “You’re pure fucking evil.” He breathed between each kiss.

“Possibly.” She squeezed her eyes shut tight when he stopped his lips just above her core, his hands running up her thighs slowly, stopping again at her hips. She could feel her heart racing and all she wanted him to do was move on, the wait was killing her.

She thought he was going to speak, but instead he pressed a kiss to her right thigh, then to her left, before moving his way back up her body. She let out a frustrated growl, the tension was killing her and she just needed something, anything. Taking matters into her hands, literally, she reached down and slid her hand inside his pajama bottoms, smiling when she realized he hadn’t bothered to put boxers on underneath. She gripped his erection tightly, smiling to herself when he let out a hiss against her breast, his fingers curling and uncurling around her hips as he tried to gather himself. 

“Stop.” He whispered, his lips pressing lightly against the skin above her heart. She didn’t stop though, instead she kept going, and when he dropped his head to the curve of her neck and let out a moan she almost came right there. Knowing that she had that kind of power over him was invigorating.

Stopping her movements, she removed her hand from around his member and reached out to slowly push his pants down, using her foot to drag them down to his ankles. He kicked them off, dropping them to join her panties on the floor and he smiled up at her when he settled himself back between her legs. Running her fingers up his bare back slowly she settled them on his head, pulling him down slowly so that she could kiss him. He smiled against her lips and he let out a soft sigh when she hooked a leg around his waist, lining him up with her center perfectly. 

He entered her slowly, his fingers gripping at her hips lightly as he held her in place below him. She let out a moan when he was finally settled inside her and she deepened the kiss, thrusting her hips upward against his. His hands finally moved from her hips and ran up her sides, tangling themselves in her messy hair as he thrust into her. She kissed him hard, tugging on his bottom lip as she silently begged him to take her over the edge. And that’s exactly what he did.

——

They had retreated to the bathroom to shower not long after their love making had ended, and Ethan had taken her against the tiled wall of the small space as well. She was surprised at how little she was bothered by his desire to have sex almost anywhere, anytime. Before being with Ethan she had definitely considered herself to be a bit of a prude, and her husband had always been a missionary position, lights off, no foreplay kind of guy. She hadn’t known any different back then, so she wasn’t much bothered by it. _But now? Well now she wondered how she had ever survived such a boring sex life._

“Thinking dirty thoughts over there?” Ethan’s voice was soft from his space across from her on the small porch. They had finally put clothes on after having collapsed onto the bed to take a nap, their morning activities having worn them both. He was sipping his second cup of coffee for the morning, the sports section of the paper held in his hands. She had settled back in the small rocker with her book, her first cup of coffee sitting untouched on the table between them. 

“You wish.” She offered him a mischievous smile and when she winked at him he let out the most adorable little laugh. She found it incredible how someone so strong and stern and powerful could be so goddamn adorable when he tried.

“Hmm…” He let out a gentle hum, his eyes returning to whatever article he was reading. She had no doubt that it was about the start of the upcoming baseball season. “You said you wanted to talk earlier.”

His words were soft and when she looked up from her spot in her book she was surprised to find that he had put the paper down, his eyes shining at her in the early afternoon sun. “Yeah.”

“Everything okay?” He asked her as he reached out to bring his coffee cup to his lips. He took a sip before placing the item back on the table, leaning back in his chair as he returned his gaze toward her.

“I um…” She didn’t know where to start. When she had driven to his house two weeks ago with every intention of having this talk, she had had it all planned out. But now, now that he was sitting in front of her looking like the most glorious thing she had ever seen, she didn’t know where to begin. “I’ve just been thinking about some stuff is all.” 

“Should I be concerned?” She could hear the worry in his tone and she immediately regretted her decision to even bring any of this up. She didn’t want to hurt him, that was never her intention, but she feared that what she wanted and what he wanted, wouldn’t line up.

Closing her book she set it down on the table gently, her hands moving to rub over her face lightly. _She could do this. She had to do this._ She couldn’t keep stringing him and Ellie along, and they couldn’t keep stringing her along either. _She could do this. She was strong enough._

But then Ethan stood up from his seat and moved toward her, taking her hands in his softly and pulling her to stand, and she lost all of her courage in the softness of his gray eyes. He pulled her against his chest with a gentle sigh and she wrapped her arms around him so tightly she thought she might break him. She never wanted to let him go.

“Whatever it is Leanne.” He whispered, his lips pressing gentle kisses along the side of her head as he spoke. “We can get through it. Together. We always have and we always will.” The words hit her heart and she choked back a sob as she gripped his t-shirt with her fingers. _Why did this man have to be so damn perfect?_

“It’s just…” She pulled back after a few minutes, reaching up with one hand to wipe back her falling tears as she eyed him warily. “I’ve been thinking about things. Between us. Things with Ellie.” She saw the panicked look on his face and she felt a little piece of her heart break. _He probably thinks I’m running for the hills._ “Not bad things Ethan.” She reached up with her free hand and touched his cheek gently, smiling when he leaned into her touch, his eyes closing as he pressed a kiss to her palm.

“So what then?” He whispered his question as his hands settled on her hips, gentle and warm, and the light in his eyes made her heart pound. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before speaking, trying to gather all of the strength that she could.

“I want more.” She barely heard her own words, and when she opened her eyes he was looking back at her with tearful eyes. He loosened the grip he had on her waist and then removed his hands all together as he stepped back away from her. She let out a whimper at the loss of contact. _She had done it now._

“More, how?” His words surprised her. She was expecting him to get angry, or to get overly emotional. She was expecting him to run away from her. _It’s what she would’ve done._

“I want, more.” She ran her fingers through her hair and let out a sigh. She wasn’t entirely sure how to put her wants into words anymore. “I want to be more. More than whatever this is.” She gestured between their bodies with her hands. “I love whatever it is that we have, but…”

“It’s not enough?” He finished her sentence for her and she could hear the heart break in his words. _He didn’t think that he was good enough for her and she could tell_. She could see it in the way his eyes met the ground and how his hands were trembling as he gripped the railing behind him.

“It’s not that Ethan.” She reached out for him, but the hand that he extended in front of him to stop her was like a dagger to the chest. _He didn’t want her right now. He would probably never want her again._

“Then what Leanne?” He sighed, shaking his head back and forth as he crossed his arms over his chest. “What do you want? And don’t tell me that you don’t know, because you wouldn’t have brought something like this up if you weren’t certain about it.” She hated how incredibly right he was.

“I want more.” She watched as he sighed again, his head dropping back down in frustration. She got it, she really did, she was getting annoyed with herself right now. “I want to go on an actual date Ethan. I want to go to dinner with you, just you. I want to hold hands and do all the stupid couple stuff that couples do.” She sighed as she plopped back down in the rocking chair, her head lifting up slowly so that she could eye him through her tears. She watched as he lifted his head as well, bringing their eyes in contact. “I want more with Ellie too. I want to do things with her, with both of you. I want to help you both out.” He let out a sigh as he uncrossed his arms, dragging his hands over his tired looking eyes.

“Leanne…” His tone made her heart shatter in two and she just knew what was coming. _He was going to throw her out. Leave her on the curb like the trash that she was._

She stood, brushing past him as she made her way inside. _She couldn’t do this._ She couldn’t stand here and let him tell her all the horrible things she already knew about herself. She felt like she was going to throw up. She felt like she was going to pass out. _Why oh why did you think having this conversation with him right now was a good idea?_ She couldn’t believe this. Making her way into the bedroom, she grabbed the stack of clothes off the dresser that she had placed there this morning and threw them back into her bag. _She had to get out of here._ She heard his footsteps echoing down the hall as he made his way toward the room. Grabbing the rest of her stuff she tossed it in quickly, shouldering the bag as she made her way out of the space, brushing past him roughly in the living room as she headed for the door. He reached his hand out and grabbed hers. It was rough. Not rough enough to hurt her by any means, but rough enough to stop her dead in her tracks. _A grip like that meant he was serious. A grip like that meant they weren’t done._

“You walk out that door Leanne there’s no coming back.” His words were harsher than she expected, but his tone was soft. He gripped her hand tighter, trying to tug her toward him and she let out a sigh as she felt her body give in. She hated that he had this power over her. “I mean it.” She turned her eyes to look at his, and the pain and confusion and anger and everything else that was etched into them broke her heart. “You leave now, without finishing this conversation with me, you can’t come back.”

“You really think giving me an ultimatum is going to work?” She dropped her hand from his with a huff, planting her feet in her spot next to the easy chair. “I’m not some young chick with nothing to lose here Ethan. I won’t be your playmate anymore.”

He let out a growl as he kicked his foot at something imaginary, his fists balling up at his sides. “You think that’s what this is about?” He shouted his question, louder than she had ever heard him shout. Even when he was mad with Campbell or one of the residents, his tone was always flat, even if he got loud, but this, this was something more. 

“Well than what is it about Ethan?” She turned to face him, setting her angry eyes on his face as she dropped her duffle bag to the floor by her feet. “You won’t listen to what I’m saying. You won’t hear me out. But now you’re demanding that I stay or that’s it? I don’t do well with ultimatums Ethan, I’m not a child. You can’t just think that there’s going to be something magical that will make everything better.”

“Dammit Leanne I’m trying!” He shouted again and she watched as a new round of tears fell from his eyes. She hated that she was hurting him like this. But she was in just as much pain, if not more, and she didn’t know what else to do at this point. She figured that a good old finish screaming match was as good a solution as any.

“No you’re not!” She almost felt her words as they slapped him across the face. And the defeated look that fell across his gray eyes made her question every decision she had ever made. “I need you to listen to me. I need to understand what I’m trying to say to you.”

“I’m trying Leanne!” His voice was harsh but low and she could see the way his shoulders slouched as he started to give up on the fight. “I’m trying but you’re not making sense right now and I don’t know what more you want from me.”

“I…” She stopped, the words getting stuck in her throat as she dropped her head downward. She had lost all the will to fight at this point. She felt like nothing she said or did was going to make this any better. He must’ve sensed her discomfort, because he reached for her once more, his hands gripping hers softly as he stepped forward. “I love you goddammit.” She whispered softly, her eyes shifting upward to look at him. The goofiest smile she had ever seen came over his face and she shook her head back and forth at his reaction to her words. “I love you and I love Ellie and I don’t want to keep pretending like I don’t.”

He let out a soft chuckle as he tugged her closer, one hand reaching up to cup her cheek softly, his thumb brushing away the tears falling against her cheek. “I love you too.” He whispered back. He tightened his hold on her hip as he leaned forward, capturing her lips in his with a soft sigh. _Well that sure did diffuse the situation quickly._

She pulled back after a moment, her hands moving to rest against his t-shirt as she eyed him softly through her damp eyes. “I don’t want to just be something anymore Ethan.” She whispered her words, hoping that he didn’t get the wrong impression from what she was saying. The gentle look in his eyes told her that he was willing to try and understand. “I want to be everything.” Her words were quiet and for a minute she wondered if he had even heard her because he just stood there staring at her like an idiot, his eyes soft and glowing.

“I love you.” He whispered. She wondered if he had missed the point of her last sentence, until he leaned forward and kissed her passionately. She knew that he understood clearly what she was trying to say. He pulled back, his forehead going to rest against hers. “I love you more than you will ever be able to imagine.” He dropped a kiss to her nose before he continued and she felt her heart racing in her chest at his words. “You’re already my everything Leanne. You have been for a while now and I don’t ever want you to think that this is anything less than that. This,” He reached up and gestured between them, his hand running down her arm to grip her hand, pressing it to his lips as he spoke, “is already everything I’ve ever wanted or needed.” 

She felt herself let out a sob as he dropped her hand so that he could cup her face with both hands. He kissed her once more and she reached down to wrap her arms around his waist, pulling him closer as he ran his tongue along her lips, asking for permission. She deepened the kiss, gasping as he gripped her chin more, and she heard him moan against her lips.

Pulling back from the kiss she dropped her head to his shoulder, tucking herself into his arms as he sighed lightly. “I’m sorry.” She whispered softly, she could still feel his body trembling softly in her arms. “I never meant for that to escalate like that.”

“I know love.” He whispered back, dropping a kiss against her hair, his hands rubbing up and down her back slowly. “It’s okay.”

She pulled back softly as she reached up to run her fingers along his cheek gently. “I love you.” It felt so good to say those words. It felt cathartic almost. She hadn’t said those words to anyone, save for maybe Jesse, since her accident. It had always been too hard. But now, now it felt like the easiest thing in the world to say.

He smiled at her, his eyes glistening under his tears. “I love you more.” She shook her head back and forth at his words. _There was no way that was possible._

“No.” She whispered, her hand running down his cheek to rest on his shoulder. He chuckled at her, squeezing her hips playfully as he leaned in for another kiss. It was soft and gentle and she could feel his love for her pouring out with every slip of his lips against hers.

“So what do we do now?” He whispered as he pulled back, his hands reaching out to brush back her hair gently.

“That’s up to you Ethan.” She rubbed his shoulder with one hand as the other fisted itself in the material of his shirt. “What do you want?”

“You.” She let out a soft chuckle at his response. _Typical._ “I want you here, with me and Ellie. I don’t ever want to wake up without you.” His words made her heart flutter and she could feel the passion radiating off of him. 

“Okay.” She replied back. She wanted him to be clear with her about this. She wanted him to know that she was all in.

“I’m nervous though.” She could tell, his hands were shaking against her hips as he spook.

“About Ellie?” She was worried about what this all would mean for the little girl as well. She loved the child and she wanted to provide the best life possible for her. 

“A little,” He said quietly, his fingers tapping her side softly, “I don’t know how this whole court thing is going to go.” He sighed softly, closing his eyes as he spoke. “I don’t want to jeopardize my chances of getting her.”

She nodded her head, she understood where he was coming from. It was killing her, but she understood completely. This wasn’t just about them anymore, there was a little girl involved, and she was the priority for them both. Keeping her safe and happy, keeping her with them, that was the only thing that mattered right now.

“I want us to stay together Leanne.” He whispered, his eyes opening to stare back at her. “I’m not giving you up. Not now, not ever.” She smiled at his words, she was thankful that he was being so attentive to her feelings right now. He very easily could’ve thrown her to the wayside in regards to his daughter. “Maybe we just need to take things slow. Keep things on the down low.” He dropped a kiss to her nose with his words. She knew, that he knew, just how hard this was on her. “Just until I finish things up with the court. It might be a few weeks, maybe a few months, but unless I know for sure that it won’t affect my chances, I don’t wanna risk it.”

She nodded her head, she didn’t want it to hurt his chances either. She would never wish that on him or his sweet little girl. “I can do that.” She ran her fingers over the exposed part of his dog tags, brushing his skin lightly. She felt him shiver under her touch and she smiled at his body’s reaction to the simplest of movements. “Just know that I’m here. For anything. You need help with her, you need anything, I’m here.”

He echoed her earlier head nod, dropping his forehead against hers with a soft sigh. “Thank you.” He whispered, pressing a kiss to her lips. 

She got ready to respond when they heard a car pull into the driveway and a door shut outside. Shifting her eyes toward the window she smiled when she watched as Mario helped Ellie out of the backseat of his pick-up, Noa walking around the front to join them on the sidewalk. She felt Ethan pull back, squeezing her hip once more as he made his way toward the front door. She let out a soft sigh as she brushed her hand over her eyes, drying the rest of her tears. The last thing she wanted was for Ellie to see her so upset.


	16. You’re In Big Trouble Mister

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *So here we have Ethan and Leanne being adorable. And Jesse being, well, Jesse...

The next four weeks went by excruciatingly slow for Ethan and while he was thankful to have Leanne around more, it was killing him that things were moving so slowly. He felt the whole world had stopped after their fight, and then their conversation, on that Sunday afternoon. After Ellie had come home, they hadn’t talked again about the subject, and he felt like things had almost been slightly left unsaid. 

She had returned home that night, and his bed felt empty without her in it. He had tried explaining to Ellie that Leanne wouldn’t be able to stay every night, as much as they both wanted her too. But then she had asked if Leanne could come to her dance practice Tuesday night and Ethan was reminded of Leanne’s words. _“If you need me…”_ It’s not that he needed her, but rather that his daughter seemed to need her too, and that was enough to warrant his phone call to her that night.

Leanne had agreed, as long as work permitted, and when she had shown up at Ellie’s practice and then gone out to dinner with them afterward, his heart had been so full that he could barely contain his excitement. He had arranged for his dad to keep Ellie that Friday night, declaring to Leanne that she was finally going to get that date she wanted. They had gone to a nice Italian restaurant and eaten dinner by soft candle light. He had then walked with her through the park, hand in hand, before taking her back to his place and making love to her all night.

He was addicted to her. To every little part of her and he couldn’t get enough. He needed her just as much as he wanted her, and he was hating that they were having to fight being together like they really wanted. He loved her, so much more than he ever thought possible, and he just wanted to start his life with her. He hated that court was keeping him from that.

Ethan had returned to work the following Monday. He had worked out a schedule with Will that made sure he was home with Ellie at night, arranging for her to stay with his step-sister and her kids after she got out of school each day. It had been quite the adjustment, but he knew that he needed to get back to work, and Ellie needed to get used to a routine that was more normal. His first day back at work Leanne had beamed at him from across the busy trauma floor and he knew that he was getting there. That things were starting to work themselves out.

Then today had happened, and he had thanked whatever God that there might be above for finally cutting him a break. 

His lawyer had called him last night, saying that she needed to talk to him immediately about Ellie’s case. He had panicked, but she reassured him that it was good news. After he had tucked Ellie into bed, he hadn’t hesitated to text Leanne. He needed to hear her calming voice. _He needed her to ground him._

_You free?_ He hit send as he plopped back against the pillows on his bed. It was too quiet in the house without her here. He missed hearing her laugh, her soft voice echoing down the hall as she tucked Ellie into bed.

_Getting ready to go to dinner with Jesse._ Stared back at him and he chuckled. He felt like an old man, going to bed at 8:00pm. She was just getting her night started apparently. _Everything okay?_

He smiled, there she was being all perfect and loving again. _Yeah. Just wondering if we could talk for a second. Need to hear your voice is all._ He had barely just hit send when his phone buzzed in his hand, and he smiled at the image of Leanne looking back at him. 

“Hey.” He answered softly, bringing the object to his ear as he stretched his legs out in front of him.

“Hey yourself.” Her voice was soft and he could hear movement in the background. He wondered if he had interrupted her time with Jesse.

“I’m sorry if I’m bothering you.” He hated sounding so pathetic, he really did.

“You’re not babe.” She replied back, and he wished more than ever that she was here in his arms. “Jesse and I were just going to grab a burger. It’s been a hell of a day.”

He could hear the exhaustion in her voice and that’s when he remembered that she had been pulling an extra long shift today. He felt bad for her, she worked herself way to hard sometimes. “Oh okay.”

She let out a soft sigh on the other end and he could hear Jesse chuckling in the background. “Ethan…” He could almost hear her rolling her eyes at him, and Jesse let out another laugh. “Talk to me.”

He let out a sigh that mirrored hers and he leaned his head back against the headboard as he gathered his thoughts. “I got a call from my lawyer today.”

She let out a small huff, almost like she had been holding her breath, and he wrenched his free hand against the blankets. “Is everything okay?”

“I don’t know.” He replied to her soft question quickly, not wanting her to worry too much. “She said it’s good news, but I’m not entirely sure what that means.”

Another soft sigh and he closed his eyes, trying to picture her face to help calm his nerves. “When are you seeing her?”

“Tomorrow. First thing.” He wanted to tell her how he had almost demanded that his lawyer meet with him right then and there, that he couldn’t handle this kind of anticipation, but he decided to save that for another time.

“Good.” Was all she said back. He heard her mutter something to Jesse and the man let out a soft laugh in return. “Can I come over after we eat?” Her words were so soft and Ethan wondered for a minute why she was trying to be stealthy about it.

“If you want.” He said softly, he had missed her terribly the last few days. Even though he had seen her at work the two days prior, he hadn’t seen her in a personal capacity since Saturday, and that had been four days ago. They had taken Ellie to get new tennis shoes and had then spent the afternoon at the park. Ethan wasn’t sure which of the 3 of them had had more fun.

“I want too.” Her words made his heart flutter. He still couldn’t believe that she wanted this as much as him. “I’ll text you when we’re done eating.” He smiled, he couldn’t wait to have her in his arms again. “Can you take me to work in the morning? After you drop Ellie off? Jesse drove to dinner but I don’t feel like coming all the way home.”

“Of course.” He replied cheerfully, he’d do whatever she needed him to do as long as he got to see her tonight. 

“Okay.” He heard her move around slightly and then he heard the sound of a car engine cutting off, he guessed they must’ve arrived at their destination. “I’ll text you in a bit.”

“Okay.” He didn’t know what else to say so he paused for a minute, opening his eyes to stare out the window across from him. “Love you.” He whispered softly, closing his eyes once more. He didn’t know if she would say it back, especially since she was with Jesse, but he had been wanting to say those words to her for a while.

“Love you too Ethan.” And then there was a click as she hung-up the phone on her end. He sighed, tossing his phone to the bed next to him and eyed the time once more. He sure hoped that her dinner date with Jesse didn’t take too long.

——

Ethan had just finished up his third game of solitaire when he saw Jesse’s car pull into the driveway. He smiled softly to himself when he saw Leanne let out a chuckle at something the other man said. She left the vehicle quickly and made her way to the porch with a little wave over her shoulder. He stood to meet her at the door, his mouth turning upward in a smile when he saw her make her way up the steps. He couldn’t believe he was so lucky to have this woman all to himself.

“You’re in trouble mister.” She whispered softly, pointing a finger at him as she made her way closer. He raised an eyebrow at her words and shrugged his shoulders.

“Me?” He asked, his eyes shifting between her and the driver of the car. He was curious as to why Jesse hadn’t left yet. _Had something happened that he wasn’t aware of?_

“Yes you.” She stopped directly in front of him, a hand going to his cheek gently in order to turn his face toward hers. “You got me in trouble too.” She whispered softly, leaning forward to drop a kiss to his lips as she ran a hand down his chest.

“How so?” His question back was whispered and he chuckled when he caught sight of Jesse glaring at him from the driveway.

“He wants to talk to you.” Leanne’s words were firm, but soft, and he immediately returned his attention to her face. “About us…” And with that she was gone, disappearing into the house with a soft sigh, her fingers lingering over his wrist as she brushed past him.

_Well fuck. That couldn’t be good._ He heard Jesse shut off the engine of the vehicle before exiting it, walking slowly toward the front of the house. He wondered what the man could possibly need to talk to him about. _He hadn’t done anything to Leanne had he?_ He thought he had been rather nice when he made his earlier phone call.

“Something you wanna talk about amigo?” Jesse’s voice was not as humorous as Ethan would’ve liked and when he stopped at the bottom of the stairs he placed both hands on his hips, eyeing the other man sternly.

“Leanne said you’re the one who wanted to talk.” He probably shouldn’t be a sarcastic ass right now, but he couldn’t help himself. “What’s going on?”

Jesse let out a huff as he leaned back against the railing by the stairs. “How long did you think you two could keep it a secret?”

“What?” Ethan was so confused. It was far too late for this mess. “Keep what a secret?”

“You two.” Jesse gestured between Ethan and the house, he assumed probably in relation to Leanne, and sighed. “How long did you two think that you could keep this relationship a secret?”

“A secret?” Ethan wasn’t aware that they were keeping anything a secret. He shook his head back and forth, _wait… She hadn’t told Jesse had she? Dammit._ Now he really felt like an ass. “Jesse? Are you telling me that Leanne never told you that we were seeing each other?”

The other man shook his head back and forth and Ethan let out a sigh. “No Ethan. She never said a word.” He huffed, his arms crossing over his chest. “Imagine my surprise when she says “I love you too”, to you, of all people, while sitting in my car two hours ago.”

“I’m sorry Jesse.” He really, truly was sorry. He had never meant for this to be kept a secret. Noa and Mario knew, he was sure that most of LA probably knew about them by now thanks to those two. “We weren’t intentionally keeping it from you.”

Another sigh escaped the man’s lips and he lifted his eyes to meet Ethan’s. They were surprisingly humorous and the slight smile that came over his face made Ethan feel slightly better, but only slightly. “How long?”

“Excuse me?” Ethan was shocked at his question, not that it was unusually or anything.

“How long have you and Leanne been a thing Ethan?” Jesse’s words were harsh this time. Ethan figured he had probably gotten on the man’s last nerve at this point.

“4 months, give or take.” He was curious as to why Leanne hadn’t already answered these questions. “It wasn’t serious to begin with, but it changed rather quickly.”

“Why?” Again, confusion took over. Ethan didn’t understand the question. _Why what?_

“Why what?” He asked softly. “Why did we start dating?”

Jesse nodded his head as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other. He eyed the front door and Ethan prayed that Leanne would come to his rescue any second now. “Yes, Ethan, why did you two start dating?”

“Well my daughter…” And the look that hit Jesse’s face was enough to make Ethan do a double take. _Wait… please don’t tell me this is a surprise too?_

“Your what?” Jesse’s voice was loud and Ethan could hear the confusion dripping from his words. _So Leanne left that part out too. Greeeeaaaat._

“My daughter.” Ethan said softly. He could see the questioning look on Jesse’s face and he could almost feel the anticipation rolling off of him. “Her name’s Ellie. She’s 6.”

Jesse’s face went from one extreme to the other and back again. Ethan didn’t know if he should run or hug the man. He honestly had no clue what to do at this point.

“So this is where Leanne has been disappearing to the last few months?” His question was soft and Ethan was thankful that whatever anger the man seemed to have had at one point was gone.

“Yeah.” Ethan reached up and ran a hand through his hair as he plopped down to sit on the top step. He was exhausted and this conversation wasn’t exactly the one he had planned on having tonight. “Leanne treated Ellie in the ER a few months ago. Ellie kinda took to her. She started hanging around more.” He looked up at the man beside him, his eyes more than likely giving away his fears. “Leanne and I, we…” He didn’t know how to tell the man that they’d been sleeping together longer than they had been dating, “We got close…”

“So you were sleeping together?” He should’ve known Jesse would go there.

“Yeah.” He dropped his head back down, his elbows coming to rest on his knees. “We just recently started the whole dating thing.” He saw Jesse raise an eyebrow at his words. “Though the feelings have been present from the start, at least for me.”

Jesse let out a soft chuckle as he dropped to sit next to him on the porch steps. “How serious is this to you Ethan?”

_Well he surely wasn’t wasting any time now was he?_ Not that Ethan could blame him. He had known Leanne a long time, long enough to remember who she used to be. Long enough to have been around when her whole world fell apart. He should’ve confided in Jesse from the get go.

“I’d marry her today if that’s what she wanted.” He risked a glance at the man next to him, and when he saw him smile at his words he couldn’t help but smile back. He meant it. He meant it more than he ever thought he’d mean anything in his whole life. Leanne was his world. Her and Ellie. And as long as he had them he knew that everything would be fine. He could make it through whatever life had to throw at him as long as he had his girls by his side.

“Good to know.” Jesse reached over and patted him on the back before rising from the spot he had just taken. He moved to stand in front of Ethan, offering the man a soft smile as he reached forward, extending his hand to the man. “You take care of her you hear me?” Ethan reached up and shook his hand with ease. “Both of them.” Jesse pointed a finger at Ethan as he pulled his hand back and Ethan let out a chuckle. He should’ve known the man would instantly feel something for the little girl he’d never met. That was just in Mama’s nature.

“No worries there Mama.” He replied softly as he moved to stand as well, watching as the other man made his way back to his car. He stood there for a few minutes, waiting until Jesse had backed out of the driveway and made his way down the street, before turning to face the house. He smiled softly to himself when he thought about what was waiting for him inside. He sure was one lucky man.


	17. We Can Finally...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *So this chapter is one of my favorites and it’s absolutely adorable. There’s also some great news and a surprise question :)

Ethan had made arrangements to meet with his lawyer the following morning and he and Leanne both had been a bundle of nerves during breakfast. They had decided to take Ellie out for a donut before dropping her off at school, together. And Ethan would never get over the huge smile that graced his daughter’s face as she got to show Leanne around her classroom for the first time. Leanne had held her hand tightly and she had listened to everything Ellie had said with curious intent. After saying ‘goodbye’ to the girl, declaring that they would both indeed see her for dinner like planned, Ethan had driven Leanne to Angels quietly. 

She had asked him about a dozen times if he would like company at his meeting, if he thought that her being there might help him get through it, but he had declared that he would fine and that he just wanted to get it done and over with at this point. He had kissed her lips softly when she leaned through the open window of his Jeep, and neither of them gave a damn that half the hospital staff was watching them. He had driven the rest of the way to his meeting with the biggest, dopiest smile on his face. _Man was he in love._

After meeting with his lawyer he had immediately called Campbell, telling him that he needed to meet with him as soon as possible. And that it could most certainly not wait until tomorrow like the man insisted. Will had agreed, after Ethan told him that he was coming from the lawyers office and Ethan had driven the rest of the way to Angels on autopilot. He had made his way straight to the ER director’s office as soon as he arrived, bypassing Leanne and Jesse with a simple wave. He needed to clear things up with Campbell before taking this any further.

His meeting with Will went smoothly, much as he expected, and he was thankful that the man had his back and was willing to work with him on all of this. He was thankful for his friendship more now than he ever was before. After saying his goodbyes and promising that he would see him tomorrow at 8:00am, he made his way back downstairs, his eyes searching for Leanne on the quiet trauma floor.

“She’s in her office.” Jesse’s voice startled him, and he turned to face the nurse with a small smile.

“Hey. Thanks.” He ran a hand through his hair as he turned back in the direction he came from, but stopped when Jesse placed a hand on his arm.

“Everything okay Ethan?” He asked softly, his concern radiating in his dark eyes.

“Yeah.” He smiled brighter, he wasn’t talking to anyone until he had talked to Leanne first. She deserved to be the first one (other than Campbell of course) to hear the big news. “Everything’s great. Just need to talk to her about something.”

“She’ll be happy to see you.” The other man said quietly. “She’s had a rough morning.”

Ethan simply nodded his head as he offered Jesse a pat on the shoulder. He turned around once more and headed down the hallway toward the office in question. When he arrived outside, he stopped, taking a deep breath before knocking softly.

“Come in.” Her voice was quiet and he could tell that she was exhausted. She hadn’t slept well the night before, despite his attempts to soothe her. And she had woken up complaining about her back hurting. He told her she needed to work less. She told him he needed to stop having sex in such uncomfortable places.

He opened the door and peered inside, the sight before him both warming and hurting his heart at the same time. “Hey.” He said lightly, his eyes catching hers from across the room. She was seated behind her desk, her glasses perched on her nose and her hair tossed into a messy bun. She had file upon file open on the desk and he could hear the soft sounds of her radio playing behind her. “Got a minute?”

She smiled at him gently and he could tell she was barely keeping herself together. “For you I have two minutes.”

He smiled back, pushing the door open and stepping all the way inside the small room. He shut the door behind him before making his way toward her. “Got more than two?” He wiggled his eyebrows at her as he dropped a kiss to her lips, but she didn’t laugh like she normally did, instead she just sighed.

“Not now Ethan.” She said, her hands dropping to her lap as she leaned back in her chair, her eyes closing behind the lens of her glasses.

“I was kidding babe.” He ran a hand down her arm before taking one of her hand’s in his, pulling her into a standing position in front of him. “You still feeling rotten after last night?” He dropped a kiss to her forehead as she practically fell into his open arms.

“Yeah.” She wrapped her arms tightly around his waist and he could feel her the tension in her body. He hated that she did this to herself. He wished she had called out sick like he told her too. 

“Well I’ve got some good news that will make your day a thousand times better.” He pulled back from her, dropping his forehead to rest against hers. She looked up at him with the softest eyes and he ran his fingers through her hair as he spoke. “I got Ellie.”

“What do you mean?” Her voice was just a whisper as her hands moved to rest against his chest, supporting herself against his taller frame.

“I got her Leanne.” He kissed her softly, his hands tangling in her hair lightly. “She’s ours.”

The happy tears that fell from Leanne’s eyes made his heart thunder in his chest and he fought back tears of his own. He kissed her again, his hands stilling themselves against her neck as she let out a soft sob against his lips.

“How?” She whispered, pulling back to look him the eyes.

“Laura had had enough.” His words were harsh, yet there was a humor to them. “She couldn’t afford to keep going through court. She didn’t wanna deal with lawyers anymore.” He dropped another kiss to her lips, smiling at her through his tears. “She wants to move to Florida with her boyfriend. The judge told her she couldn’t do that if she had Ellie, because they weren’t going to let her take her from me like that. She told the judge that I could have her then. That she didn’t want her anyway.” He choked back a sob. He couldn’t imagine how anyone in this world wouldn’t want that sweet little girl in their life. She was his entire world and he would be lost without her. He thought it was a shame that her mother didn’t love her the same way he did. “She signed the papers right then and there.”

Leanne let out another sob, wrapping her arms around his waist tightly as she tucked herself against his chest. Her tears were soaking his t-shirt and she was squeezing him so hard that he couldn’t breath, but he didn’t care. “I’m so happy for you guys Ethan.” Her voice was strained and he could hear, and feel, the tension of her words.

Pushing her back slowly he held her at arm’s length and offered her a gentle smile. “Happy for us Leanne. Us.” She shook her head ‘no’ and he pulled her back to him, wrapping his arms around her tightly. “No more hiding Leanne. We can finally be together. We can be a family now.”

Another sob wracked her body and Ethan felt her shatter in his arms. Those words had done her in and he was thankful that he was holding her upright, because she surely would’ve fallen had he not been.

“It’s going to be okay babe. We’re going to be okay.” He whispered, dropping a kiss to her hair. “I love you so much.”

She clung to him tighter, her eyes closing as she relaxed against his chest, letting out a deep breath that he hadn’t realized she had been holding. He ran his hands up and down her back, hoping to comfort her somehow. He meant it. He meant every word of what he said. He loved her and he wasn’t going to give up on them. They could finally be the family they deserved to be.

“What does that mean for you?” She pulled back after a minute, her tears having subsided some and her voice returning to normal. “You’ve been living in that little house for almost 8 months now. You’ve hardly been working. What does it mean for all of that? What does it mean for us?”

He offered her a smile as he reached up and brushed his thumb across her cheek, doing his best to brush away her tears. “I’ll stay in the house for now. Ellie doesn’t seem to mind it. And I talked to Campbell, he’s willing to let me stay on the day shift so that I can be with her at night. He said I’d have to give him one weekend a month, but he’s willing to let you or Noa have that same weekend off so that Ellie has someone familiar to be with. He’s gonna do his best to be accommodating, he knows how it is, being a single father and all. He doesn’t want Ellie to suffer or miss out any more than she already has.”

Leanne stared up at him with wide eyes, and he realized that he was already signing her up for things she didn’t agree to. He got ready to speak up when she reached up and cupped his cheeks with her trembling hands, pulling his lips down to settle against hers. “I love you. Both of you.” She whispered, kissing him gently when his hands tugged on her hair at his approval of her words.

“We could make things more permanent too you know?” He whispered when he finally pulled back, his eyes settling on hers as he held her head gently in his hands.

“Ethan Willis…” She looked up at him, shock etched into every corner of her face. “Are you proposing to me?”

Ethan let out a soft chuckle, pulling her in for another kiss. “Are you saying ‘yes’?” He whispered against her lips, one hand trailing downward to take her left hand in his. He ran his fingers over her ring finger and he smiled when she looked up at him with bright eyes.

“You don’t get a ‘yes’ until I get a ring mister.” She said lightly, chuckling at him as he pulled her to him tightly. He clung to her as if she were going to disappear. He couldn’t believe this was happening. 

“I’ll get right on that.” He whispered against her hair, dropping a kiss to her ear as she snuggled herself closer to him.

“Good.” She whispered back, her hands smoothing themselves against his back as she spoke. “I like white gold, just so you know.”

He let out a laugh, squeezing her tightly once more. _This was defiantly turning out to be the best Wednesday ever._


	18. Perhaps...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *I know, I know, two chapters in one day?! What’s wrong with me?! I’m really just feeling this chapter and I kinda couldn’t wait to share it! I hope you guys enjoy our adorable couple being sickenly cute.

The following morning Ethan woke up to the feeling of an empty bed. And while this wasn’t entirely unusual, Leanne was often the earlier riser of the two, the sound of her vomiting in the bathroom, was unusual. He knew something was off, in fact, he had known it for the past few weeks, but now, well now he was almost 100% certain that he knew what her issue was. The aching back, the constant exhaustion, the biting his head off over every little thing. Yep, he was certain of it now. _She’s pregnant._ The smile that came across his face was short lived though, the sound of the toilet flushing in the other room startling him out of his thoughts. 

He wasn’t entirely certain how to approach the subject with her. Sure, he had brought up the whole ‘let’s have a baby’ thing on a whim all those months ago, but he hadn’t mentioned anything about it since. And neither had she. And while they weren’t exactly preventing another life from forming, they weren’t exactly praying for its existence either. Shaking his head back and forth he let out a sigh, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed and standing quietly. He made his way out into the hallway, thanking whatever God there might be that Ellie’s door was still closed. He really wasn’t looking forward to having to explain that one to the girl.

He moved his hand up to knock on the bathroom door when he saw it open slowly, Leanne appearing on the other side. She looked miserable, absolutely, downright miserable. And Ethan’s heart broke in two at the sight in front of him. Her hair was ruffled and tangled in all the wrong ways and the dark circles under her eyes were more prominent than they had been yesterday. She was paler than Ethan had ever remembered seeing her, and he could see her body trembling underneath his Dodger’s t-shirt.

“Hey.” He whispered softly, reaching forward to wrap his arms around her. But she shrugged away from his touch, wrapping her arms around her stomach in protest. “Babe?” She shook her head back and forth and shrugged her way past him toward the bedroom. He wondered if he had really made her angry, or if her hormones were playing a trick on him. When he heard the soft sobs coming from a few feet away he guessed it was the latter.

Making his way toward her slowly, he knelt down next to the bed, reaching forward to brush her hair off of her forehead with a smile. She shivered under his touch and he wondered for a brief second if maybe she was just sick. Maybe she had gotten that stomach bug that had been going around. Maybe he was delusional after all. But then shrugged away from him again, rolling over so that her back was facing him, and he knew without a shadow of a doubt that this was more than some virus. _This was the real deal._

“Can I get you anything?” He asked quietly, moving to sit on the bed next to her. Part of him wanted to wrap her up in a warm hug and cry happy tears at what was currently taking place inside her body. The other part of him knew that she’d probably bite his head off he laid a finger on her.

“No.” Her voice was so low that he barely heard it, but he knew that she was opting for as little attention as possible to be paid to her right now. He wondered deep down if she knew what was going on too.

“Okay.” Taking a chance, he reached out and ran a hand along her arm softly. When she didn’t pull away from his touch he figured that was a good sign. “I’m gonna go get ready.” She nodded her head against the pillow and he watched as she squeezed her eyes shut tightly. “If you need the bathroom just come in.” Another nod and she let out a soft sniffle, her body curling in on itself even more than before. “I love you.” He leaned forward and risked dropping a kiss to her head. She didn’t return his words of endearment, but she also didn’t punch him in the face either, so he figured that was a good enough sign.

Ethan quietly showered before moving back into the bedroom and getting dressed in the dark. Leanne had fallen asleep at some point during his getting ready and he wasn’t about to chance what would happen if he turned the lights on and woke her up. After gathering everything he needed from the small room he left, shutting the door behind him quietly, before moving to wake up the sleeping child down the hall.

It had taken him an extra fifteen minutes to get Ellie out the door that morning and he had told lots of little white lies to get the girl to leave Leanne alone to sleep in peace. After he had dropped her off at school he sent Campbell a text letting him know that Leanne wasn’t feeling well and that he was going to run home and check on her before coming into work. The ER director hadn’t seemed bothered much by his request and he wondered for a brief second if he wasn’t the only one who had suspicions about Leanne’s current state. 

He had stopped off at the drug store on his way home and it took him a good eight minutes to work up the courage to walk inside and buy what he wanted. He had grabbed the most expensive pregnancy test he could find, praying that the cost meant better accuracy. _As a doctor, he knew that a blood test was the only sure fire way to know for sure. As a worried boyfriend, he wanted only the best._ After grabbing the box and paying for it quickly he had practically run to his Jeep, praying that he wouldn’t see a soul he knew before he was able to make it out of there. He had driven home at speeds well beyond that of the speed limit. He was honestly surprised he hadn’t been pulled over.

He had stopped by the house for a few minutes after leaving the store only to find that Leanne was still curled up in bed, her breathing even and her eyes fluttering lightly behind closed lids. He had dropped another kiss to her head before running his hand down her cheek. He had wanted to run his hand lower, down to her stomach. He wanted to know if he had somehow missed the obvious signs of growth taking place. But then she had let out a whimper and had cuddled closer to the pillows and he decided that he should let her rest. He left the box of pregnancy tests on the bathroom counter and headed for the door with a small sigh. He was nervous. So nervous he couldn’t think straight. He didn’t know how he was going to make it through shift without losing it.

—

When Leanne woke up later that morning she was thankful that the nausea was gone. She wasn’t sure if she had eaten something bad last night or if she was finally getting that stomach bug that had gone around Angels, but either way, she had woken up at 5:30 that morning feeling like garbage. She was thankful that Ethan had left her alone and let her sleep. And while she was sure that Ellie had probably been rather upset that Leanne wasn’t the one taking her to school like promised, she prayed that the girl hadn’t given her father too hard of a time.

Stretching, she reached over and grabbed her phone off the nightstand, turning it on to see that it was quickly approaching 11:00am. Shit, she was going to be in trouble if she didn’t get up and get moving soon. She was supposed to have a meeting with Campbell at 1:00pm and then her shift was scheduled to start after that. She felt a wave of dizziness hit her at the thought of having to go into work and she bit her lip, hoping that it would pass with little reaction. 

She gave herself another few minutes of laying in bed, scrolling through her news app and checking the weather before finally deciding that she couldn’t stay put all day. Making her way into the bathroom she stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the box sitting on the counter by the sink. She felt her knees get weak and her eyes started to water. _What the fuck is this?_ She was going to kill Ethan. Slowly and painfully. She couldn’t believe him.

_What the hell is this?_ She typed out the text faster than she thought possible and she leaned back against the bathroom wall with a huff, her eyes attempting to bore holes through the pink box across from her.

_It’s a pregnancy test…_ She hated him. Yep, that was it. He was done for.

_Why do I need one of these Ethan?_ Then a light bulb went off somewhere in the back of her mind and she felt her heart tighten in her chest. Reaching down, she quickly lifted the hem of the shirt she was wearing, eying her stomach curiously. 

_Because you’re pregnant Leanne._ She almost dropped her phone at his words. How dare he suggest such a thing. 

_No Ethan, I’m not._ She let her head fall back against the tile wall as she counted backward in her head to the last time she felt normal. 

_Just take the test Leanne._ She let out a growl as his words stared up at him. _If it’s negative, we move on. We don’t have to mention it ever again._

_But if it’s positive?_ She didn’t want to even think about that possibility right now. Even though her math told her that it had been at least 7 weeks since she hadn’t felt like a horrible mess. She couldn’t fathom being pregnant. Not at her age. Not after everything she had been through.

_Then we go from there._ She felt the tears prick at her eyes and she wiped a hand over them furiously. She didn’t want to break down. Not until she had a reason too. _I love you Leanne. Nothing is going to change that. Baby or no baby. But isn’t knowing better than not?_

She choked back a sob as she slid down the wall, clutching her phone to her chest tightly. _I’m scared Ethan._

_I know baby, so am I._ Was all he replied back with. She shook her head back and forth slowly before pushing herself into a standing position. She didn’t have a choice now. She had to at least take one of the tests. She had to least know whether or not all this horribleness was for a good cause.

After giving herself another five minute long pep talk she finally convinced her that it was now or never. She ripped the box open hurriedly and did her business, not wanting to drag this process out any longer than possible. After setting the test on the counter she had decided to take a shower. She prayed that the warm water would comfort her, because regardless of what the test said, there was a part of her that was going to be heartbroken.


	19. Great News

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *So Leanne has some news for Ethan...

When Leanne didn’t show up at work that afternoon Ethan’s first instinct had been to panic. But then he had called her and she had said that she just wasn’t feeling well and she left it that. He figured that if either one of those tests had come back positive she would have told him. He told her to feel better and promised that he would take care of her when he got home. She had chuckled at his words and he thought it was nice to finally hear her laugh after being so closed off for the past few days.

He had hung up without any more thought to the whole ‘pregnancy’ matter and went about his day like normal. After having picked Ellie up at school he did his best to explain to the young girl that Leanne was going to need extra snuggling that night and that she had been feeling a little sick lately. Ellie had been thrilled to hear that she could help out somehow and Ethan knew that the little girl had missed Leanne’s bubbly personality. They had driven home in silence, both lost in their own thoughts, and all Ethan could think about was whether or not Leanne was okay.

Leanne was in bed again when they got home, and he could hear her quiet breathing from his spot in the doorway. Ellie had begged to go in, but Ethan didn’t want to disturb the woman just yet, so he had promised the girl that she could snuggle later, when Leanne was aware enough to make that choice. He had watched as the girl sulked off to do her homework and he felt bad, but he knew that it was just something that needed to happen.

After dinner, he had helped Ellie get ready for bed and while he was running the brush through her chestnut curls he heard the bedroom door open for the first time all night. He held his breath as he watched Leanne leave the front room, heading for the bathroom quietly. He returned to his movements, half listening to Ellie as she told him all about her field trip to the zoo next week. She asked him again if he would be coming along and he once again promised that the girl that he would be there, Campbell having already agreed to give him the day off. She asked if Leanne could come too, but Ethan had once again explained to her that she would need to talk to her about that first. Ellie let out a huff just as the bathroom door opened and the woman in question emerged.

“Hey.” He called softly, watching as she stopped in her tracks in the hallway and turned. She offered him and Ellie a soft smile as she moved to lean against the door frame.

“Hi.” She whispered back. Her cheeks were still pale and Ethan could tell that she had been crying at some point. His curiosity was instantly peaked, but he knew not to ask in front of Ellie. He had noticed the box was gone from the counter when he got home, and there was no sign of either test anywhere in the house. _He didn’t know if that was a good sign or not._

“Everything okay?” He was genuinely worried about her. Pregnant or not, he knew that she had been feeling super crummy lately and it was killing him to see her so messed up.

“Yeah.” Her voice was quiet and she didn’t meet his eyes. His heart broke a little at what that could possibly mean. “How was school Ellie?”

“It was great!” The girl answered and Ethan was thankful for the distraction. “We’re going to the zoo next week!”

“That sounds like fun.” Her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes but she looked happy enough that the girl didn’t seem to notice.

“You should come!” Ellie jumped up off the bed and ran toward her, her arms wrapping themselves around her stomach as she stopped in front of her. “Pleeeaaase. It’ll be lots of fun.” She looked up at Leanne with the most pleading eyes Ethan had probably ever seen and his heart broke for a split second.

“I’ll see what I can do okay baby.” Leanne’s words were soft and when she reached down to tangle her fingers through Ellie’s hair she finally looked up and met his eyes. He felt his heart catch in his chest.

“Can we snuggle now Leanne?” Ellie’s question was soft and when she pulled back Ethan could see her practically shaking with anticipation. “Daddy said you needed extra snuggles because you didn’t feel well.”

Shaking her head back and forth Leanne offered Ethan a look, and then a soft smile, before turning her attention back to the little girl. “Of course Ellie. Why don’t you go make yourself comfy and I’ll be right there?”

Ellie nodded her head excitedly before turning to grab her unicorn off the bed and then taking off down the hallway, a large smile on her little face. Ethan waited until he heard the bedroom door close before he stood, making his way to stand in front of the woman in front of him.

“Is everything really okay?” He whispered quietly, reaching out to take her hands in his. He didn’t want to push her. He wanted her to know that he was okay with whatever their future held for them. He just wanted to make sure that she was okay with it too.

“Yeah.” Her reply was quiet and she stepped into his arms, wrapping her arms around his waist tightly as she buried her face against his neck. He wrapped his arms around her tightly and pressed a kiss to her head.

“It’s okay Leanne.” He whispered against her hair, one hand moving up so that he could run his fingers through her unruly mane. “We have Ellie. That’s all that matters. She’ll always be our baby, no matter what.”

He felt her shake her head against his shoulder and he pulled back slightly, dropping his forehead to rest against hers. He ran his thumb along her tear stained cheeks and offered her the best smile he could give her. But then the words that left her mouth next knocked the wind out of him and he almost forgot to breath.

“I’m pregnant.” She whispered, her hands going to rest against her stomach as she spoke.

“What?” His eyes went wide and he pulled back, eyeing her quietly. “Pregnant?”

She shook her head up and down and when he saw the small smile come across her face he reached forward and tangled his hands in her hair, pulling her to him and crashing his lips against hers. He couldn’t believe it. She was pregnant. He was going to be a father, again.

“I took both tests.” Leanne’s words were whispered against his lips as she pulled back from him, her eyes glistening under the light from Ellie’s bedside table. “They were both positive.”

Ethan let out a soft chuckle, pulling her to him once more. He kissed her hard, his hands going to her hips to pin her back against the door swiftly. He wanted to savor this moment for the rest of his life. 

“You were right.” She said softly as she pulled back once more, reaching up to thread her fingers through his hair. “I knew you were right. I just didn’t want to believe it.”

He dropped his forehead to hers once more, reaching up again to brush her tears back softly. “This is a good thing Leanne.” He whispered, dropping a kiss to her nose and then one to her forehead, his lips lingering against her smooth skin after his words had been whispered.

“I know.” He dropped his eyes back down to meet hers and he smiled when he saw the soft glow on her face. “I spent all day thinking about it. I’ve done nothing but cry all day. Both happy tears and sad.” She closed her eyes for a second as her hands settled on his shoulders softly. “I’m terrified Ethan.”

The way her lips trembled when she spoke broke his heart in two and he couldn’t help but let his hands fall to her waist, moving to push aside the material of her t-shirt, running them along her stomach. That was when he felt it, the tiniest of bumps, and he knew without a shadow of a doubt that this would be the most amazing experience of their lives, regardless of how terrifying it was.

“I know baby.” He dropped a kiss to her lips as he cupped her sides with his hands, his thumbs brushing over the smooth skin of her little bump as he spoke. “I’m scared too, but we’ll get through this. We’ve always gotten through everything life’s thrown our way. This isn’t any different.”

Leanne let a sob escape her lips as she wrapped her arms around his neck and tucked herself against his chest with a soft sigh. “What about Ellie?”

Ethan knew that they would have to tell the little girl. That she should be the first to know. However, he also knew how risky this whole situation was. Leanne’s age and her past medical history weren’t going to do either one of them any favors in this whole ordeal, and he knew it. But he also knew that she was the strongest woman in the world, and that this baby was a God given miracle. He would do whatever he had to do to keep them safe. If that meant holding out on telling the small girl, than he would do just that.

“We tell her.” He pulled back softly, his hands going to cup her cheeks as he continued. “When things are safer. We tell her.”

Leanne nodded her head and offered him a sniffle, her fingers running along his neck and tangling in his hair as she pulled him in for a kiss. “I love you.” She whispered against his lips, her hands stilling their movements along his skull as she spoke.

“I love you more.” He whispered back, his hands going back to her stomach. He would never get tired of touching her there. Especially not now that there was a baby inside. He leaned in and kissed her again, this time deeply and passionately, and when she moaned against his lips he couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride swell inside him.

“Can you believe it?” She whispered a few minutes later, her lips ceasing their movements against his. “We’re gonna have a baby Ethan?”

He chuckled softly, his hands moving to her cheeks once more. He cupped her face in his hands and offered her the biggest smile he could. “We’re gonna have a baby.” He whispered back, just before pulling her lips back to his. 

He couldn’t believe this. He couldn’t believe he had been right about all of this all along. A baby. They were going to have a baby. Together. Him and Leanne. His heart had never been more full. Never in a million years did he think that he would be lucky enough to find a love like Leanne’s. Much less to have a daughter as amazing as Ellie. And now? Now he was also going to have another child to love and adore. He truly was the luckiest man alive.


	20. Nerves

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Short, but sweet. I hope you guys enjoy!

The next few days flew by quicker than Leanne knew possible and when Tuesday had finally arrived she had been a nervous ball of energy all morning. She had woken up at 3:40am and was unable to go back to sleep, despite Ethan’s pleas that it was far too early to get up. Leaving him in the bed, she had retreated to the small couch, where she had tossed and turned before giving up and turning on the small TV. She had watched at least three episodes of “Chopped” by the time Ethan came sulking out of the bedroom, his hair sticking up every which way. He had eyed her suspiciously from the doorway of the bathroom before retreating inside for a shower. She hated that her anxiety was rubbing off on him.

After she had told Ethan about the positive pregnancy tests almost a week ago she had been unable to stop her mind from reeling at all the possibilities, both good and bad. And every time Ethan would try and be his sweet self and calm her down, she would push him away. She had been horrible to him over the weekend, and she had even gone as far as to spend both Saturday and Sunday nights at her house instead of his. He had told her at work on Monday morning that he hated that she was shutting him out, but that if she needed some space to calm her mind, than he could do that. But then their shift had gone from bad to worse and she had left Angels in tears. She had showed up at his place a little after 8:00pm and crawled into bed with him and Ellie. Claiming that the only thing that she needed right now was them.

But that had been last night. And now, well now she was back to her stand-offish ways. It wasn’t just that she was nervous about this baby in general. No, there was more to it. Today they were actually going to the doctor. Officially. They were going to get confirmation that there was in fact a tiny human growing inside her. And that terrified her even more than she thought possible. 

“Leanne…” Ellie’s sleeping voice rang down the hallway and Leanne snapped out of her thoughts. She was thankful for the little girl’s relaxing presence the past few days.

“Yes baby?” She called back from her spot on the couch. Her eyes blinking to try and ward off the tears she felt brewing.

“Are you and daddy still going to go to the zoo with me today?” Leanne heard her voice before she saw her, but then her little head appeared over the side of the armchair and her little gray eyes were full of hope.

“Of course angel.” Leanne reached out for the girl, knowing that she was feeling the tension between her and her father, even if she didn’t say it. When Ellie climbed into her arms she let out a soft sigh, snuggling the tot against her chest. “We’re going to drop you off at school, run our quick errand, and then we’ll be there before the bus leaves.”

“Promise?” Her little voice whispered.

“I promise.” She pressed a kiss against the girl’s wild hair and she was suddenly very thankful that they had chosen to seek a doctor outside of the hospital for their help. She had been more than accommodating and had assured them that she would do a simple scan, just to make sure everything was fine, before sending them on their way. They had a more intense appointment scheduled for Friday afternoon, but Leanne knew that she couldn’t wait that long to make sure that everything was okay.

Ellie settled against her chest with a soft sigh, her arms going around her neck lightly, and Leanne wrapped her arms around her tighter. She would never get tired of snuggling the little girl and she had sworn up and down to herself that she would do everything in her power to make sure that Ellie never felt unwanted or pushed aside with this new baby coming into the picture. She would never forgive herself if she was the cause of any more stress in the child’s life.

“Hey girls.” Ethan’s soft voice brought her from her thoughts and she snapped her eyes up to meet his as he moved to sit on the edge of the couch. “Everything okay?” He reached forward, brushing back some of Ellie’s loose hair before dropping his hand to Leanne’s arm softly.

“Yeah.” She whispered, her eyes shifting from his down to the sleepy child in her arms. “I was just reassuring her that we would be there today for her field trip.”

The smile that graced Ethan’s face was one that she would never get tired of seeing. “Good.” He whispered, his hand moving to cup her cheek gently. “Why don’t you go get ready?” His question was soft and she nodded her head at him, her grip on the child loosening as he took her in his arms. 

She had showered and dressed quietly before leaving the bathroom, making her way into the bedroom to finish getting ready. She heard Ellie telling Ethan all about the things she wanted to see at the zoo, all the animals that she couldn’t wait to show them, and she felt her heart swell with pride. She was so incredibly blessed to have them both in her life, she hoped that they both knew how much she loved them.

She heard Ellie head for the bathroom and she could hear Ethan joking with her about whether or not her “boyfriend” would be there. She imagined that Ellie was probably rolling her eyes at her father at that point in time. Smiling to herself, she made her way out of the bedroom just as Ellie bounded down the hallway, her backpack slung over her shoulder and a giant smile on her face.

“Come on guys!” She said excitedly, her eyes beaming as she grabbed her sunglasses from the table and opened the front door. “Let’s go!”

Ethan let out a soft chuckle as he grabbed his wallet, eyeing her from across the room as he threw the last of the items of their packed lunches into the cooler on the counter. “Hold it!” Leanne and Ellie both stopped in their tracks, unsure of which of them he was speaking too. “Do you have everything?” He gestured at both of them and Leanne did a mental checklist in her head of all the things the doctor told them to know before they showed up at their appointment.

“Yes Ethan.” She replied softly, eyeing him as she grabbed her purse from the hook by the door. She had made sure to write down everything, leaving nothing out, and she had stuffed the list in her purse last night after dinner. “I’ve got everything.”

He smiled at her, his eyes shining bright in the early morning light. “What about you missy?”

Ellie let out a soft huff as she crossed her arms over her chest. “Yes daddy, I have everything.”

“Okay.” Ethan let out a soft chuckle as he made his way toward them, the cooler in one hand, his car keys in the other. “Then let’s go!”

Ellie let out a giggle as she ran toward the Jeep, the biggest smile plastered on her little face. Leanne couldn’t help but let out a soft laugh as she bounced up and down beside her door, waiting not so patiently for Ethan to unlock the vehicle. She stopped in her tracks when she felt his free hand press against her lower back, his head dropping against her shoulder with a soft sigh.

“I love you.” He whispered, his lips pressing a kiss against the material of her t-shirt.

“I love you too.” She whispered back, her lips curling into a smile at the simple gesture. _The man was constantly surprising her with his antics._

They both made their way to the car then, their eyes shining bright as they listened to the tot ramble on and on about how awesome their day was going to be. They had dropped her off at school with a kiss each, and promised her that they would be back in an hour, just in time for the bus to leave. She had hesitated at first, refusing to let go of both of them, but they had reassured her that there was no way that they were going to miss this trip. After her teacher had finally convinced her to go start on her morning work, they had both lingered for a split second to make sure that she was indeed okay without them. They were both more nervous for this appointment than they wanted to admit, and Leanne knew without a shadow of a doubt, that they would both have much rather stayed with Ellie that morning.


	21. Doctor’s

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Here we have nervous Leanne and adorable Ethan and over-the-moon Noa.   
> **P.S. There aren’t that many chapters left!

They had arrived at the doctor’s office with five minutes to spare and Ethan had watched as Leanne had signed in with trembling hands. He knew he wasn’t the only one nervous for this appointment, in fact, he was pretty sure that he had no right to be nervous at this point. It was Leanne’s body that was about to go through a shock, not his. And while he knew that women went decade’s between having children, he also knew that twelve years was a stretch that her body might not be able to handle. She had also confided in him about how her injuries from her accident might have hindered her ability to get pregnant in the first place, so he could only imagine what that might mean for her in terms of carrying a child. He just wanted her to be safe, a healthy baby at the end of nine months was the bonus, but he had already prepared his heart for the worst. And he knew she had too.

She had held his hand tightly while they waited for her name to be called and he had done his best to offer her the support he knew she needed. He felt like he was failing though when she stood and started to pace, her face doing nothing to hide her fears. He wished he knew how to help her. He wished he knew just what to say to make it all better, but he unfortunately didn’t, so he resorted to folding his hands in his lap and dropping his head down, saying a silent prayer to whoever might be up there that this appointment wouldn’t leave them hurting.

“Leanne Rorish.” A soft voice called through the waiting room and he snapped his eyes up to see an older looking woman with a clipboard eyeing them softly. He imagined that she was probably used to this type of greeting.

Rising from his seat he gently took Leanne’s hand in his and walked her toward the door. “That’s us.” He replied quietly, squeezing her trembling hand as he did his best to offer the nurse a smile.

“I’m Rebecca.” She extended her hand toward them, but Ethan was the only one who took it. He prayed she didn’t think that Leanne was being rude. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Hi Rebecca.” He shook her hand gently as he tugged Leanne through the door. “I’m Ethan. This is Leanne.” He nodded his head to the side, toward his quiet partner, and he was thankful when Rebecca offered her a simple head nod, the small smile on her face never leaving.

“Come on back.” She gestured behind her slowly, escorting them toward a room with a soft sigh. Once inside she instructed Leanne to follow her, claiming that she needed to get a few vitals before the doctor arrived. Ethan had just offered them both a soft smile before sinking into the chair by the door. 

_You guys make it to the doctor yet?_ He let out a sigh at Noa’s words as they stared back at him. They had confided in the young resident about their situation over the weekend, feeling that someone needed to know just in case something happened. He was surprised that Leanne hadn’t suggested Jesse, but then again, he figured that Noa was probably easier to keep quiet than the nurse.

_Waiting to see her now._ He typed back, his head falling back against the wall with a sigh. His whole body was shaking. He couldn’t even fathom being in this position right now. He was unsure how men did this multiple times.

_Let me know what they say?_ He let out a soft chuckle at the girl’s words. Of course they weren’t going to be able to keep her in the dark about anything from here on it. He was silently thankful for that. It felt good to have someone to confide in about his worries.

In fact, he had talked the poor girl’s ear off Sunday night about all of his concerns and worries. He had laid it all out for her. The trickiness of getting pregnant, the fear of Leanne not being able to handle it, both physically and emotionally. The fear of telling Ellie, of rocking her poor little world once again. His worries of not being able to be the man that Leanne needed, the father that his children deserved. Noa had listened intently and then had soothed all his woes with comforting words about knowing that everything happened for a reason. He had never been more thankful to have the girl in his life than he had in that very moment.

The sound of the door opening brought him out of his thoughts and he watched with a soft smile as Rebecca returned, Leanne trailing behind her quietly. He noticed some of the sadness in Leanne’s eyes was gone, and he was thankful that maybe the nurse had gotten through to her some. She instructed Leanne to change into a gown and that she and the doctor would be back soon. He watched with gentle eyes as Leanne did just that, folding her clothes and placing them in the chair beside his once she was done.

“Hey.” He reached out for her then, standing so that he could be next to her. “I love you.” He whispered, dropping a kiss to her head softly. “More than anything.”

“I know.” She whispered back, the first words she had spoken since they had left Ellie at school almost thirty minutes ago. “I love you too.” Her voice was soft and he could hear her fighting back every emotion that was running through her body. He just wanted to scoop her up in his arms and hold her tight and never let go. But then the door opened behind them and Rebecca entered the room, followed by a younger woman with long red hair, and Ethan was forced to keep his hands at bay, choosing to hold onto Leanne’s softly as they began the process.

——

The appointment had gone off without a hitch and Leanne had excitedly called Noa as they made their way back across town toward Ellie’s school, her free hand holding onto Ethan’s tightly as they drove.

“Soooo…” The girl’s voice was elevated and Ethan let out a chuckle as Leanne moved to put the call on speaker. “How did it go?” She asked excitedly.

“Great.” Leanne’s voice was soft and Ethan was thankful for the fact that the doctor had been able to calm her woes during their somewhat quick appointment.

“So everything’s okay?” He could hear the hesitation in the red head’s voice and he knew that she was just as worried as they were.

“Everything’s fine.” He said back softly, hoping to calm her woes quickly.

“Oh thank God.” She let out a breath on the other end of the phone and they both let out a chuckle at her words. He knew that Noa had been waiting on pins and needles for those words. Just like they had. “What did they say?”

“Well…” Leanne’s voice was quiet and Ethan watched as she shifted her eyes toward him, silently asking for his permission to go further. He nodded his head slowly, bringing her hand up to his lips and pressing a kiss against the smooth skin. “I’m a little further along than we thought.”

“By how much?” The girl’s tone was reflective of the feelings that Ethan had had when the doctor had said those same words to them.

“Turns out it’s more like fifteen weeks, not nine.” Leanne replied back, her eyes sparkling in the mid-morning sun. He still couldn’t believe that they had gone so long without knowing. He had expressed his concern to the doctor immediately, knowing that Leanne hadn’t started pre-natal vitamins until the day after the home tests came back positive. But she assured them that everything looked fine and that Leanne was healthy, so there was nothing to worry about. That they just had to be more careful from this point forward.

“Oh my God,” She whispered, and Ethan could only imagine her face right now, “how did we not know?” He let out a chuckle at her question, she always prided herself on being so observant after all.

“Don’t feel bad Noa.” He answered, his eyes shifting to Leanne’s as they pulled into a parking space in the school’s lot. He could see the buses pulling in behind them and he said a silent prayer that they had beat them there. “We didn’t know either.”

She let out a soft sigh on the other end and he undid his seat belt as he offered Leanne a smile. “Guys that’s great!” She said after a minute of silence. “When do you go back? It’s soon right?”

“Yeah.” Leanne’s voice was barely a whisper. He guessed that she was going to leave out the rest of their exciting news for a later date. “We go back Friday for a full appointment.”

“Thank God.” Noa said with a soft laugh. “I want full details, every last one of them, understand?”

Chuckling, he reached forward and squeezed Leanne’s shoulder as he spoke. “No worries kid, we’ll fill you in this weekend.” He said softly and he watched as Leanne’s eyes went wide at what he meant. “But we have to go now. There’s an anxious six year old inside who wants to show us the monkeys at the zoo more than she’s ever wanted anything in her life.”

Noa let out a laugh on the other end and he could hear the smile in her voice. “Okay guys. Go. Have fun!” She said lightly and Ethan smiled as Leanne’s face lit up at her words. “Take tons of pictures for me!”

“We will.” Leanne said softly, her hand stilling against her stomach as she eyed him quietly from her seat. “Bye Noa.”

“Bye!” And then the young girl was gone and it was just the two of them. 

Leaning over, Ethan pressed a kiss to her shoulder with a soft sigh. “Come on love.” He pulled back and opened his door, stopping when he felt her hand on his arm. 

“I love you.” She whispered, her fingers curling gently around his wrist as she spoke. He felt his heart tighten in his chest at her words.

“I love you too.” He whispered back, his eyes glistening as he fought off tears. He was so madly in love with her right now, right here in this very moment, that he couldn’t possibly stand it. He couldn’t imagine how much more he was going to love her when she was fully pregnant, her belly round, his child growing inside her. He was the luckiest man alive and he would do whatever it took to make sure that his girl’s stayed safe and by his side for the rest of their lives.


	22. We’re Gonna Need a Bigger House

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Two chapters in one day, I know, I’m kinda insane. But I figured this one’s kinda short too, so why not.

Their trip to the zoo had been just all three of them had needed and they had spent the entire day laughing and enjoying each other’s company. After they had returned to school they decided to go ahead and take Ellie home for the day and they had all three collapsed in Ethan’s bed for a nap as soon as they had made it home. When Leanne woke up a few hours later the bed was empty and the room was dark, terrified that she had slept through the entire night she sat up quickly, her hand reaching for her phone on the table. Grabbing it, she pulled it close, letting out a breath of relief when she noticed that it was only a little after 6:00pm. 

Making her way out of bed quietly she opened the door and stepped into the hallway with a soft sigh. She could hear the rain hitting the windows of the front room and she said a silent prayer that the storm had held off until they had made it home. She glanced to her right, smiling to herself when she caught sight of the young girl sitting at the table by the window, her coloring book open in front of her. She could hear her humming along to whatever tune was playing in her head and she felt her heart flutter at how much she reminded her of Ethan in that very moment.

“Hey you.” She heard Ethan’s soft voice before she saw him, and when she turned in the direction of his office she let a soft smile come over her face at the sight of him. He was seated in his office chair, his hair all ruffled and his eyes still sleepy. He had lost his nice button-up shirt at some point and traded it in for an old Army t-shirt, and she could see his bare legs crossed under the desk. She would never get tired of seeing him in such a domestic state.

“Hi.” She whispered, making her way toward the small room. She leaned against the door frame as she eyed him softly, her arms going to cross in front of her chest lightly. “Everything okay?”

He offered her a simple nod before motioning her to come to him, which she readily did. He reached forward, pulling her to his lap with a soft sigh, and when his arm wrapped around her waist and his head dropped to her shoulder, she couldn’t help the chill that left her body.

“I’ve been thinking…” He whispered, his lips cool against the flushed skin of her shoulder. She was worried what exactly those words would mean given their current circumstances.

“About…?” She was nervous where he was going with this. She knew he had a wild imagination sometimes, something Campbell was always cursing, and she hoped he wasn’t going to far off the grid here.

“We’re gonna need a bigger house.” He said softly, his hand reaching up to brush some of her hair from her face. “This place isn’t gonna cut it anymore.”

She shook her head softly. She knew that this time would come, that they would have to have this talk eventually. She knew they couldn’t live in this tiny house anymore. Hell, she didn’t even live here, not technically. But she was scared. Scared what it would mean if they moved in together. What having a home together would be like. Even though they were going to have a family together sooner than they expected, they weren’t even engaged, or married. She wondered how that would look to people, how awkward that would seem to the outside world. She didn’t want Ellie to be inconvenienced either, after all, the girl had just started to get settled into this house as it was.

“I know it’s a big step Leanne.” His words brought her out of her thoughts and she turned her head so that she could look him in the eyes. “I know it’s a lot to think about, and we don’t have to make a decision today, or even next week.” He leaned forward then, pressing his forehead against hers and she felt her heart skip a beat at the sincerity in his eyes. “But I’d rather not be moving when you’re so pregnant you can’t get around.”

She let out a soft chuckle at his words. If this pregnancy was anything like her last one, that wouldn’t take long. She had been miserable when she was pregnant with Caitlin, and John had never once hesitated to remind her of it. As loving of a husband as he was, she didn’t like him much during that second go round, in fact, she figured she probably spent seven of the nine months she was pregnant hating him. She knew that Ethan would be more supportive than that, in fact, he was already proving to be a better partner in this.

“Move?” She whispered, her mind was going a thousand different places, all at once, all before she could finish the thought before it. That would mean she would have to sell her house. Say goodbye to all those memories, to all that stuff. She didn’t know if she was ready for that. She didn’t know if she would ever be ready to move on that much. “But…?”

Ethan must have been able to sense her worries because his hand started rubbing her back soothingly and he pressed a light kiss to her lips before pulling back, his eyes soft and gentle as he spoke. “I just think we should start looking. That’s all.”

She nodded her head then, her eyes closing behind their respective lids as she fought off a round of tears. This was entirely too much to take in at once. “Okay.” She knew her tone betrayed her words but when she opened her eyes he was still staring at her softly. She didn’t know why he was so supportive of her through all of this, why he was so understanding, but she was thankful for it.

“My brother-in-law’s in real estate.” He whispered, his hand settling against her lower back as he said the words quietly. “Maybe he can keep an eye out for us.”

She shook her head back and forth, she hadn’t even contemplated telling Ethan’s family yet. Hell, she hadn’t even met them. Any of them. And here she was carrying his baby. She couldn’t even fathom how that would go over.

“No.” Her response came out harsher than she expected but he just tugged her closer, wrapping his arms around her as she settled against his chest with a soft sob. “We can’t… We…” She sniffled, her hands tangling themselves against the material of his shirt. “We haven’t even told your family that we’re together. They don’t even know who I am Ethan.”

He let out a soft chuckle as he dropped a soft kiss to her head. The next words he spoke made her heart stop beating for a split second as she tried to weigh them in her head. “They know exactly who you are love.” He whispered, his hands threading through her hair gently. “Ellie’s told them all about you.”

She hiccuped, her eyes closing tightly. This was bad, this was very, very bad. “But…”

“No buts.” He said softly as he dropped another kiss to her hair. “They can’t wait to meet you. They understand that things are… complicated…” He let out a soft chuckle with his words as he shifted his head downward so that their eyes could meet. “But they’re supportive. My step-mom already knows you’re a better future daughter-in-law than Laura ever would’ve been.”

She choked back a sob at his words. _No one said anything about her becoming anyone’s daughter-in-law. Had they?_ “She…”

“Not that she’s looking for a wedding to help plan or anything.” He said lightly, his eyes glimmering at her behind a thin layer of tears. “They’re going to love you Leanne. And they’re going to be so excited.”

She could tell by the light in his eyes that he was telling the truth. She didn’t know the extent of his relationship with his family. Hell, she still didn’t know anything about them. But she was starting to get the feeling that this might not be such a bad idea after all. Maybe they could finally be a family, the three of them, and with his family’s help, maybe they could make this work.

“Don’t you think I should meet them before we tell them?” She whispered her question against the material of his shirt, her tears leaving a damp spot against his shoulder. “Don’t you think that would be a bit of bombshell to drop on them?”

He chuckled once more, dropping a kiss to her forehead. “How about we tell Ellie first?” She felt her breath hitch at his question. “This weekend? After our next appointment?” She simply nodded her head against his shoulder, knowing that she couldn’t find any words that would suffice. “Then we’ll meet with them.” Another nod and another sniffle and she felt him press his lips against her forehead once more. “They’re gonna love you Leanne. I’m not worried about that.”

She wanted to reply, but she didn’t know what to say, so she just snuggled closer, her eyes closing as the sounds of the rain outside soothed her. This entire day had just been a complete whirlwind of information and her head hurt from taking it all in. She couldn’t even fathom trying to process telling Ellie now, much less meeting Ethan’s family for the first time. She just prayed that she’d have the strength to make it through all of this once piece.


	23. Celebrating

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *So there’s a **big** surprise in this chapter! There’s also some smut,  you have been warned!

The rest of the week had gone by slowly and by the time Friday afternoon had rolled around Leanne was downright exhausted. They had sat down and talked to Campbell that morning, explaining everything to him slowly. They had both expected him to be angry or at least annoyed, but instead he had hugged them both, wishing them the best of luck. He told them that he would be there for them whenever he could, that they could count on him to have their backs, and they had been extremely grateful.

After meeting with him they had left the hospital and headed to their second appointment, both nervous beyond belief for what was going to come of their trip. But things had once again gone well and they had left the appointment with their first pictures. Ethan had sat and stared at them when they got home, his eyes watering as he flipped from image to image, and while Leanne was just as thrilled as he was, she was having a hard time being as mesmerized as he was. Her brain was reeling from all the information she had to take in, and even though she had been through this twice before, things were different now. _Very, very different._

“I still can’t believe it.” She heard him whisper from his spot on the couch. She shook her head back and forth, that had been about the ninth time he had said that since they left the appointment. “I mean, who would’ve thought…”

“I know Ethan.” She said quietly, moving to sit beside him in the small space. She dropped her head to his shoulder as she removed the small cards from his hands, her eyes falling on the black and white image in front of her.

“Twins?” He whispered, again. “How in the world?”

She let out a soft chuckle at his disbelieve. “Guess you’re just special huh?” She joked, her eyes sparkling as she looked up at him. She honestly couldn’t believe it herself. She figured that getting pregnant with one baby was going to be hard enough work, much less staying pregnant with one one. _But two?_ She couldn’t even fathom that. Her brain hurt from absorbing all the information they had had thrown at them the past few days.

“Very funny.” He whispered, his arm going to wrap around her shoulders as he tucked her against his side. He dropped a kiss to her hair as he ran his fingers up down her arm. “Can you imagine how Noa’s gonna take this? She gonna lose her damn mind.”

Leanne let out a soft chuckle at his words, she could only imagine. “Noa? I’m more worried about Jesse. He doesn’t even know we’re expecting yet.” She looked up at him with worried eyes. “He’s going to kill us.”

Ethan shook his head back and forth slowly, his eyes soft and humorous as he leaned forward, pressing a gentle kiss against her lips. “He’s gonna be so happy Leanne.” He whispered, his hands tangling in her hair as he pulled her to him.

“Are you happy Ethan?” She whispered, her eyes dropping downward toward the space between them. She heard him let out a huff as he reached over and lifted her slowly, bringing her to his lap.

“I’ve never been more happy for anything in my entire life.” He whispered, kissing her deeply, his hands gripping at her head softly. “Never.”

She pulled back enough to drop her forehead against his, her eyes searching his for any kind of disappointment, but she didn’t find it. Instead she found nothing but love, and her heart started racing.

“I love you.” She whispered, moving her legs so that she was straddling his hips, her hands going to tangle in his hair as she pulled him close. “I love you so fucking much.”

His eyes went wide at her use of the f-bomb, something he didn’t think she ever said unless she was really, really angry, and he leaned in, kissing her passionately. “I love you more than that.”

Shaking her head back and forth she dropped her hands to his shoulders, running them down his chest as she started to slowly undo the buttons of his shirt. They hadn’t had sex since finding out that she was pregnant, mainly because she had just felt like pure shit the last few weeks, but tonight, with all this good news and the house to themselves, well she wanted nothing more than to enjoy herself.

“Whatcha doing?” He asked softly, his hands settling on her hips as she relaxed back against his legs, her fingers gripping at his shirt gently as she moved to push it off his shoulders.

“What does it look like I’m doing?” She whispered, running her hands down his bare chest, stopping right above his belt buckle as she brought her eyes up to meet his.

“It looks like you’re trying to take advantage of me.” His voice was light and when his fingers trailed under the material of her blouse, running along the warm skin of her stomach, she shivered under his touch.

“Would you like me to stop?” She asked, her fingers stilling their movements on the button of his jeans as she pressed her forehead against his.

“No ma’am.” He whispered, leaning in to capture her lips in his. She let out a moan as he rocked against her, his hands moving to the hem of her shirt as he tugged her upward. She pulled back enough to let him remove it, giggling when he tossed it across the room. 

She sighed when his head fell forward, his lips pressing against the smooth skin of her chest. She shivered when he pushed the straps of her bra aside, his fingers trailing down her arms as they went. 

“I’ve missed this.” She whispered, her hands moving to tangle in his hair as he kissed his way down toward her breasts, stopping only when he needed to push the material of her bra aside. She felt him chuckle against the skin, his tongue trailing along a nipple as he reached behind her, undoing the garment in one swift motion, tossing it in the direction he had her shirt.

“You have no idea.” He whispered against her chest, his lips moving to run along the other breast, his teeth grazing over her nipple as she leaned back in his lap, allowing him better access.

She let out a soft moan when he reached up with one hand, taking the other breast in his palm while he swirled his tongue around her nipple. She couldn’t believe the power this man had over her. She was complete mush in his arms at this point.

“Bedroom?” She whispered her question as she tightened her fingers around his hair, begging for him to keep going. He didn’t respond though, just stood swiftly, lifting her in his arms as he went. He deposited her on the bed a minute later, his body hovering above her for a second before he finally joined her.

He returned his lips to her breast, his hands reaching between them to undo the button of her pants, his hands pushing them down gently as he trailed his kisses lower. She felt him stop when he got to her stomach though and for a second she thought something was wrong. But then she looked down and saw the most tender look in his eyes, tears brimming behind his gray orbs.

“You’re the most beautiful woman in the world.” He whispered, his hands moving to rest against her slightly rounded belly. She closed her eyes at his words, her heart stopping in her chest as she felt his lips press lightly against her bump. “I can’t believe I ever got so lucky.”

She reached down then, her fingers going to tug on his hair, desperately trying to bring his head back up to hers, but he was having none of it. Instead, he pressed kiss after kiss against the tightened skin of her stomach, his fingers gently pushing her underwear down as his lips continued their assault. She fought back the tears in her eyes at his loving touch, the way he was handling her like she might break. 

“Please Ethan.” She croaked out. She couldn’t handle this. She had wanted this to be passionate, to be hot and steamy, not like something out of a Lifetime movie. He looked up at her then, his eyes soft in the dim light of the bedroom. He dropped another kiss to her stomach before he started working his way back up, his tongue swirling around her nipple once more as he slid a finger inside her. She bucked her hips against him, her hands going to grab at his shoulders as she pulled him upward. She slammed her lips against his when she finally got him close enough, and when he moaned into the kiss she dropped her arms to his waist, quickly pushing his jeans and boxers down.

“Easy girl.” He whispered into the kiss, and she whimpered as he added another finger, his thumb stroking her core as he slowed his movements. “No rush.” He pressed his lips to hers again, and she tugged him closer, her hand going between them to wrap around his erection. He moaned against her lips and she tugged on his bottom lip as he sped up his pace with his thumb.

“Ethan…” She dragged out his name as he withdrew his fingers, but then his hand was on her hip and she felt him moving to settle between her legs and she dropped her hand from around him. He slid into her slowly, his head dropping to her shoulder as he let out a whimper at the contact, and she settled her hands in his hair as she wrapped her legs around his waist tightly. 

He thrust into her a few times before setting a decent pace and when he crashed his lips against hers, his tongue begging for entrance, she couldn’t help but indulge him immediately. She felt him shiver as she ran her fingers down his back and she hooked her ankles together, giving herself better leverage as she met him thrust for thrust. She felt him start to shake in her arms, his head pulling free from the kiss as he dropped his head downward, his teeth grazing along her shoulder as she picked up the pace.

“Come on Leanne.” He whispered against her shoulder, his hand sliding between them to give her a little extra help, his thumb running along her core as he slammed into her. She tightened her fingers around his hair, her head falling back against the pillow with a low moan. She was thankful that for once in her life she didn’t need to be quiet. “That’s it girl.”

She closed her eyes shut tight as she felt herself tighten around him. She couldn’t believe this felt so damn good. Sure, sex with Ethan was always good, but this was intense on a whole other level. She felt herself start to shake and she knew she was close. Tugging his head up to hers, she slammed her lips against his roughly, her hips lifting themselves up. She felt him start to tighten inside her, his hand against the bedsheet tightening as she pulled from the kiss. She felt his head hit her shoulder and the next thing she knew they were both coming, his teeth sinking into her shoulder as he let out a moan of pleasure that she didn’t even know was possible. 

“Damn.” Was all she whispered when she could finally get her thoughts together. Ethan had collapsed on top of her, his head nestled softly in the crook of her neck, his fingers caressing her hip lightly as he tried to relax his breathing.

“You know…” He whispered against her flushed skin, his head lifting up so that their eyes could meet. “I’ve heard that sex during pregnancy was amazing…”

She chuckled, her fingers brushing over his sweat covered brow. His hair was a wild mess, his eyes dark and his skin flushed. She couldn’t remember a time when he ever looked so adorable.

“But that….” He pressed a soft kiss against her lips before dropping his forehead to her chest, pressing a string of featherlight kisses against her sternum. “Was fucking incredible.”

Another chuckle left her lips and she tugged his head back up to hers once more, her fingers settling gently against his cheek as she spoke. “And just think…” She smiled up at him, her eyes glistening as she whispered her words to him. “We still have 4 more months to go.”


	24. Noa and Mario

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Here we have our lovely couple filling Noa and Mario in on their good news.

They had made love one more time after that, before retreating to the shower. Leanne had reminded him that the others were expecting them at Noa’s tonight, and that no amount of groveling was going to get him out of going. They had an announcement to make after all. After getting ready they had both lingered in the small living room, their eyes shifting around the quiet house.

“Now we definitely have to move.” He whispered softly, his fingers reaching out to tangle with hers. She could hear the softness in his voice. The love and the gentleness. She had been nervous about making such a decision a few days ago, but now, now she knew they had no choice. _There was no way in hell they could raise three children in this house._

“You think?” She asked quietly, her eyes settling on his as he pulled her to his chest. He dropped a kiss against her lips as he squeezed her hand tighter in his own.

“We’ll start looking on Monday.” His words made her heart flutter. They were going to tell their friends tonight. And then Ellie would be home tomorrow and they had already decided that they were going to sit her down and fill her in as well. All that was left was Ethan’s family, but with his dad out of town until next weekend they had chosen to wait until then to fill them in on the good news.

“Okay.” She whispered softly against his lips. She gave him a small smile as she squeezed his hand in return and she hoped that he knew just how much she meant what she was saying. That she was okay with this. That this was a step that she knew they had to take. She hoped he knew that she was ready.

—

They arrived at Noa’s about fifteen minutes later and they were slightly relieved to see that they were the first to arrive. Ethan was hoping to get a few minutes alone with the girl before everyone else showed up so that they could fill her in on their good news. Turning the car off, he quietly made his way around the Jeep, opening the door for Leanne with a soft smile. He thought she looked stunning sitting there in the early evening sun, her hair hanging in loose curls around her shoulders. She smiled up at him as he stepped back, gesturing for her to lead the way toward the front door, and he felt his heart catch in his chest. He could just barely make out the tiny bump under her shirt and he recalled how incredibly fascinating it had been to watch her change her top for a good twenty minutes earlier. She claimed that everything she had made her look fat. He reminded her that everything that she had made her look pregnant, there was a difference. 

“Hey guys!” Noa’s voice called from the front steps of her small house and Ethan couldn’t help the smile that formed on his face at the image of the girl in front of him. Noa surely had grown on him over the past year and a half, and he considered her like a sister to him. He was incredibly proud of how far she had come in the time he had known her.

“Hey!” He called back, grabbing the bag from the back seat as Leanne made her way up the steps, wrapping her arms tightly around the red head. “We brought dessert!” He held up the bag in his hands and he heard Leanne chuckle at his words.

“In other words,” He heard her say softly as he made his way up the steps, “we stopped and got dessert because we forgot it.”

Noa let out a soft laugh as she reached for him, wrapping her arms tightly around his shoulders and he pulled her close, dropping a kiss against her head. “It’s fine. I had to send Mario to the store because he forgot to get charcoal. Again.”

He shook his head as he pulled back from her, his eyes catching Leanne’s across the small space. “Good. We wanted to talk to you alone anyway.”

The young girl halted in her steps, her hand freezing against the doorknob as she turned to eye them both suspiciously. “Is everything okay?” She asked softly, her eyes doing little to hide her fear.

“Everything’s fine.” Leanne reached out and squeezed her arm gently, motioning for her to continue inside.

They followed the girl through the small foyer and into the kitchen in the back, their eyes taking in the surroundings of the small house. Ethan had only been here a few times, mostly to pick up Ellie, and he had never gone any further into the space than the front room. It was small, but homey, and he was pleased with the young girl’s décor. He guessed that she hadn’t included Mario in any of the decorating decisions.

“Sooo…” She stopped once they made into the kitchen, her back leaning against the counter nearest the stove, her eyes wide with anticipation. “What’s going on?”

Ethan let out a chuckle as he placed the bag on the counter, his hands reaching out to pull his lover closer to him. “We have some news.” He said softly, his arm wrapping around Leanne’s shoulders as they came to stand in front of the girl.

“Okay guys, I know you’re pregnant…” She clasped her hands together in front of her and sighed. “What am I missing?”

Leanne reached down then, pulling something from out of her purse, and Ethan noticed that they were the pictures they had received at their appointment yesterday. She eyed them softly, a small smile forming on her lips before she handed them to the red head, her arms then going around Ethan’s waist as they waited patiently.

Noa eyed the cards with a soft smile, her eyes filling with tears as she choked back a sob. “So the baby is okay?” She whispered, her eyes lifting up to meet his.

“Babies…” He said softly, reaching forward to tap his finger above the “A” and then the “B” printed on the cards. “The babies are fine.”

The look that came over Noa’s face was more than he knew what to do with and before he knew it she was throwing her arms around them both, pulling them against her with a sob. They both stood shell shocked for a minute, before they each wrapped an arm around the young girl’s shaking shoulders, hugging her closely.

“Twins?” She whispered, pulling back as she eyed the cards once more. “You’re kidding?”

Leanne shook her head, tears falling down her cheeks fast as she took in the girl’s question. “We had them check three times.”

“There’s definitely two of them.” He whispered then, reaching up to run his hand up and down Noa’s trembling arm. She brought her hand up to her mouth as she reached out to hand the cards back to Leanne.

“I…” She shook her head back and forth, a giant smile forming on her lips as she shifted her eyes back and forth between the two of them. “I’m so happy for you guys.”

Her words were soft, but Ethan knew that she meant every word she said. “Thanks hun.” He said softly, reaching forward to pull her tightly into his arms. She wrapped her arms around him with another sob and when she squeezed him in her arms he couldn’t help but smile against her head. He placed a kiss against her red locks just as they heard the front door open, and she pulled back quickly, wiping a hand over her eyes just as Mario rounded the corner.

“Hey… Guys…” He stopped dead in his tracks in the doorway to the small room, the bag of charcoal he had in his hand hitting the floor with a soft thud. “What’s going on?” He shifted his eyes around the room, stopping when he saw the tears in his girlfriend’s eyes, and he quickly made his way toward her. “Are you okay?” He asked softly, his hand going up to cup her cheek, his thumb brushing her tears aside.

Ethan watched as she shook her head softly, smiling up at him as she glanced over his shoulder at him and Leanne. “It’s not me.” Her words were soft as she stepped around him. “They have some good news.”

Mario’s eyes moved from his face to Leanne’s and back again and Ethan thought that the young man might just run out of the room at all the emotions that were being displayed. He knew that the kid wasn’t much for touchy feeling family time, he was surprised that he had survived with this group for so long. But then Leanne was reaching forward to place the small pictures in Mario’s trembling hands and he couldn’t help but hold his breath as the young man’s eyes shifted downward. 

“You guys…” He snapped his eyes back up, locking them with Leanne’s as he swallowed. “No way!”

Leanne nodded her head slowly, a bright smile coming across her face as she tapped her finger on the top picture. “Keep looking.” She said softly, and Ethan watched as the younger man’s face went from gentle to confused to ecstatic and back again.

“Twins?!” He all but shouted, his eyes blinking repeatedly as Noa rubbed his back gently, her eyes shining bright as they connected with Ethan’s over the man’s shoulders.

“Yep. Twins.” Ethan said softly, reaching forward to pat Mario’s arm. He was surprised when the kid stepped forward, pulling him into a rather emotional embrace. He wrapped his arms around him tightly, patting his back as Noa and Leanne both let out a soft ‘aww’ from behind them. They practically jumped apart, Mario instead reaching for Leanne, pulling her in for a tight hug as well. He watched as they held onto each other tightly for a few minutes, and he wrapped an arm around Noa as they watched the two cherish the moment.


	25. We Have Some News

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Here we have our favorite couple sharing their news with Team!Family!   
> **The only chapter I have left is them telling Ellie, but I’m not 100% done, so just bare with me guys (it might be a few days).

The group had thankfully calmed themselves before the others had arrived and Leanne had tucked the pictures safely into Ethan’s back pocket just as Jesse stepped through the front door, a giant smile on his face when he realized that the two of them were there. They had shared hugs and a good laugh before Ethan made his way outside, claiming that he didn’t trust Angus and Mario to not start a forest fire without some adult supervision. Leanne took that as her cue to pull Jesse aside, deciding that it was now or never when it came to telling the man their delightful news.

She had wrapped her arm around his shoulders and escorted him outside onto the small porch, where she promptly pushed him backward onto the small swing before she started pacing. She ran her hand through her hair when she heard him let out a soft sigh from behind her and she stopped in her tracks at the words that left his mouth.

“I think I know what this is about.” He said softly, and when her eyes met his she knew that he knew. 

“Yeah.” She held her breath as she moved to stand in front of him, her trembling hands being pulled gently into his as he stood, placing himself in front of her.

“I thought I was imagining things at first.” His voice was quiet and she blinked back the tears that were already threatening to fall. “The unusual moods, the lack of coffee drinking, the way Ethan hasn’t been able to take his eyes off of you the past few weeks.”

She choked back a sob as she stepped into his open arms. “Oh Jesse.” She whispered, her tears falling freely against his shoulders. “We wanted to tell you.”

“I know.” He whispered, his hand rubbing soothing circles on her back. 

“We…” She pulled back then, reaching up to rub her eyes with her hand. “We were waiting to make sure everything was fine.”

“And is it?” He asked softly, his hands reaching up to cup her cheeks, his eyes gentle as they bore into hers.

“It’s more than fine.” She whispered, a smile breaking out across her face as she gently stepped back. “Wait here.” She said softly, and she quickly made her way inside. She caught Ethan’s eyes almost immediately, as if he had been waiting for her to search him out, and she motioned for him to come outside with her. 

She stopped just outside the door, her hands going to run through her hair once more as she watched Ethan step outside, his eyes instantly finding Jesse on the other side of the porch. He turned his eyes to her quickly, noticing her tears, and he reached for her. “You okay?” He whispered against her head, his lips pressing a gentle kiss against her ear.

“Definitely.” She pulled back slowly, reaching out to slide her hand into his back pocket before taking his hand in her other, all but dragging him toward their friend who was not patiently waiting for them. “Look.” She held the pictures out once more and she watched as Jesse’s eyes shifted from hers to Ethan’s and back again, before he pulled the cards into his own hands.

They stood there in silence for a few minutes, Ethan’s hand gripping hers tightly as they waited for a reaction from the man. Leanne noticed his eyes starting to fill with tears as he got to the last image in the stack, his head snapping up to look at them both with wide eyes.

“Waaaiiit…” He dropped his eyes back down again and she heard him mutter something in Spanish under his breath before he looked back up. “Really?”

Ethan let out a soft chuckle next to her and she squeezed his hand as he spoke, his words warming her heart. “Double the babies for you to spoil Mama.” He said softly, and she watched as Jesse’s eyes flooded with tears. 

He reached out then, handing the photos to Ethan as he pulled her into the tightest hug she had ever received from him. She let out a soft sob as she hugged him closer, her eyes closing as he whispered against her shoulder. “It’s about damn time.”

They stood that way for a few minutes before Jesse pulled back from her, eyeing her softly being shifting his gaze to the man on her right. “And you!” He pointed at Ethan as he stepped back, his arms reaching out to pull the taller man into a tight hug as well. “This is the best news I’ve ever heard.” He said quietly, his hands patting the Army Colonel lightly on the shoulders.

Leanne reached up to cover her mouth with her hand, trying her best to control her sobs. She couldn’t believe that everyone was so happy for them. This was definitely not the reaction that she had been expecting from anyone, especially not Jesse. She couldn’t believe that their friends loved them so much, that they were so happy for them and their good news. Her heart filled with joy as she saw the others start to filter out on to the porch. _Guess now was a good as time as any to make their big announcement._

She watched as Jesse released Ethan with a soft smile, before moving to step around them. She saw Noa nod her head at them and she closed her eyes, turning her back away from the group for a second as she tried to compose herself. She felt Ethan’s arm go around her waist gently, his lips pressing a kiss to her ear as he spoke.

“We have some news guys.” He said softly, and when she turned around she couldn’t help but smile at the curious glances coming from Rollie, Angus, and Elliott, the only three who didn’t already know what was going on.

“We’re having a baby.” She said quietly, and at first she didn’t know if they had heard her, but then Angus was stepping forward and pulling her into a hug and Rollie was shaking Ethan’s hand and she figured that her voice had been a little louder than she expected.

“Not just that.” Ethan added softly, his arm going out to hand a picture to the four men who weren’t already aware of just how good at procreating they were. “We’re having twins.”

Leanne let out a laugh at the look on Campbell’s face, and when Angus went as white as a ghost she was thankful that Mario was there to steady him. They all stood in silence for a few minutes, everyone taking in the good news, and Leanne was thankful when Rollie finally spoke up.

“Well that’s the best damn news I’ve heard in months.” He said softly, his eyes glistening behind his own unshed tears. And when he pulled her in for a hug, his arms wrapping around her tightly as Ethan shook Will’s hand beside them, she couldn’t help but feeling like the luckiest woman alive.


	26. Telling Ellie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Well, here we have it, the last chapter. And our lovely couple is going to share their good news with the new big sister to be :)

After telling their friends their good news the group had celebrated well into the night, joking and laughing and just enjoying each other’s company. After leaving Noa’s, Ethan had driven them home in silence, his mind on one thing and one thing only, telling Ellie. It’s not that he wasn’t excited to tell the little girl that she was going to be a big sister, because he was. But more than anything, he was nervous. Her world had been rocked so much in the past six months and he wasn’t entirely sure how this would affect things. The last thing he wanted to do was to take anything away from his daughter.

When they had finally made it home they had both showered in silence, changing into their pajamas and climbing into bed without a single word to each other. It’s not that they were mad at each other, at least he didn’t think they were, but rather they were both feeling the overwhelming emotional toll of what was about to happen to their world. Things had been simple, once, and now, well now they were far from it.

He had tucked Leanne against his chest with a simple kiss to the head and they had fallen asleep almost instantly. When he awoke the following morning his companion was gone and for a minute he panicked. _Had she left him already?_ Then he heard the sounds of the TV in the other room and he let out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. It was unlike her to be up so early, especially given that he was there for her to snuggle with. Letting out a soft sigh he dragged himself out of bed and made his way quietly into the living room.

“Hey you.” He whispered, his eyes catching sight of his lover curled up in Ellie’s favorite chair, her unicorn blanket draped over her. 

“Hi.” She whispered back, her eyes shifting from the TV screen to meet with his.

“You okay?” He was worried about her, it wasn’t like her to be this quiet.

“Just worried.” Her voice was barely audible and he felt his heart clench in his chest. There were so many things to be worried about, he was curious as to what she was focused on now.

“About what?” He made his way toward her slowly, not wanting to scare her off. When she didn’t flinch away from him or break eye contact, he offered her a soft smile, moving to sit on the couch across from her.

“Telling Ellie.” She said softly, her eyes filling with tears. “I’m worried she’ll hate me for coming into the picture and ruining things.”

“Oh love.” He reached out for her then, his arms moving to wrap around her tightly as he dragged her from the chair and into his lap. He had no idea that she was concerned about that. “She could never hate you. Ever.”

Shaking her head back and forth against his chest she let out a soft sniffle, her arms wrapping around his waist tightly. “She’s just a kid Ethan. This will totally rock her world.”

“And we’ll be there to make sure that it gets righted Leanne.” He dropped a kiss to her head then, his arms tightening around her as he spoke. “We’re gonna get through this.”

She let out a soft sigh, her head tilting upward so that she could lock her eyes with his. “I love you.” She whispered. “I just want things to be okay.”

Leaning down, he dropped a gentle kiss to her lips before resting his forehead against hers. “I love you more.” He whispered back. “And things will be just fine.”

—

The couple had stayed like that for a little longer, the sounds of the rain falling outside lulling them into a comfortable state of contentment. When they heard Ethan’s sister pull up outside they both felt their hearts tighten in their chests, their anxieties from earlier coming back. Ethan had taken a half-asleep Ellie from Mae’s arms, thanking her again for watching the tot for them, and made his way inside. 

“Leanne!” The girl had practically jumped from Ethan’s arms at the sight of the older woman and when she was finally free she was flinging herself into her arms with a giant smile.

“Hi baby.” She whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to the girl’s soft hair. “I missed you.”

Ethan felt his heart clench in his chest at the words leaving Leanne’s mouth. Sure he knew that the woman cared for his daughter, but seeing just how much made him feel all weak in the knees.

“I missed you too!” Ellie snuggled in closer and Ethan figured that now was as good a time as any to bring up their news.

“Hey peanut.” He said softly, moving to sit in the chair that Leanne had occupied not that long ago. “Leanne and I need to talk to you about something.” 

Ellie’s eyes shifted from his to Leanne’s and back again, her brow furrowing as she spoke. “Am I in trouble?”

“No. No baby of course not.” Leanne whispered, her hands going out to brush the girl’s hair out of her face. “We have some good news.”

“Are we getting a puppy?” Her little voice asked excitedly. Her eyes were wide and Ethan almost wanted to tell her ‘yes’ just to soften the blow that they were about to deliver.

“No honey.” He whispered. He grabbed the envelop of pictures from the table between them and slide out the cards as he did so. “It’s something even better than a puppy.”

“A pony?” Her brow furrowed once more and Ethan felt like he was the worst father ever because he was about to burst her so perfectly crafted bubble.

“No love.” Leanne spoke this time, reaching out to take the cards from his shaking hands. He was thankful that she seemed to be handling this better than him. _That certainly didn’t seem to be the case earlier this morning._

“So what then?” She asked softly, her eyes shifting to the small objects in Leanne’s hands. “What are those?”

Ethan watched as Leanne swallowed, her eyes blinking back another round of tears. She gently pulled the top card out of the stack and turned it so that Ellie could see the image printed on the front of it. 

“Do you know what this is Ellie?” She held the card up some, the girl’s eyes squinting as she examined the image for a second.

“Yeah!” Ethan was surprised by how excited she seemed to sound. He wondered if she truly knew what it meant, or just what it was a general image of. “Jackson had one of these at show-and-tell last week. He said his mommy’s having a baby and that this was a picture of the baby inside his mommy’s tummy!”

“You’re right honey.” Leanne said softly. “That’s exactly what that is.”

“But that’s not a picture of Jackson’s baby is it?” Her little eyes crinkled together as she reached to take the card from Leanne’s shaking hands.

“No love, it’s not Jackson’s baby.” Ethan barely heard himself speak, but he felt his heart start to race at his words. He didn’t know how long they could keep this game up before someone, namely Ellie, got confused.

“Then who’s baby is that?” She asked quietly, her eyes shifting from the card in her hands to Ethan’s face. She locked her eyes with his and Ethan knew that he was a goner. There was no way he could escape his daughter’s look.

“That’s your baby.” He whispered. He waited for Ellie to say something, or even Leanne, but they both just sat silently. Ellie returned her gaze back to the card before she lifted her eyes to lock with the woman’s.

“Is this baby in your belly?” Her question was whispered and Ethan almost felt like the whole world was going to stop spinning.

“Yes Ellie.” Leanne smiled at the girl then, her hands moving to pull the image of Baby A and Baby B out of the stack. She handed it to Ellie gently. “Both of those babies are in my belly.”

Ellie’s face went from confused to excited to murderous and back again, and Ethan was fearful of just how the girl was going to respond to the woman in front of her. He knew that telling her about one baby would be hard enough, but two babies, well that was an idea that he still hadn’t wrapped his own head around.

“I get two babies?!” She exclaimed excitedly, her eyes going wide as the information she was just given sank in.

“Yes honey.” Ethan said softly. “You’re gonna have two babies.”

And then Ellie was throwing her arms around Leanne’s neck and she was crying what looked like happy tears and Ethan felt his heart explode with happiness. Never in a million years did he think that he would ever get this lucky. Ellie pulled back a minute later, her tear filled eyes shifting to his face as she released her hold on Leanne. She reached for him then, and he couldn’t help but pull her little body into his arms, cradling her against his chest with a soft sigh. 

“Daddy?” She asked quietly a minute later, her body pulling away from his as she lifted her curious eyes up to meet his.

“Yes baby?” He had a sneaky feeling that this question wasn’t one he wanted to hear. 

“Are you and Leanne gonna get married now?” _And he had been right._

“Um…” He swallowed back the sudden lump in his throat, his eyes catching Leanne’s over the little girl’s shoulder. They hadn’t discussed anything having to do with getting married. In fact, they had barely even discussed the prospect of buying a bigger house. 

“We um…” Leanne’s voice shook just as much as his and he was thankful that she didn’t seem to have an answer either. Although it was appearing to make things more awkward that way.

“Well… are you?” Her little voice was full of all kinds of seriousness and Ethan couldn’t help but offer her a smile. He shook his head at her playfully, before scooping her up in his arms.

“We’ll be right back.” He said softly, carting the young girl off with him and into the back bedroom with a chuckle. If she wanted a proposal, well than he would give her one. 

The two returned a few minutes later, both giggling uncontrollably, and Ethan could tell that Leanne was curious. She eyed them softly from her spot on the couch and when he deposited the tot into her lap with a smile, she got a curious glint to her eyes. Digging his hand into his pocket he let out a soft laugh as her eyes went wide.

“Leanne…” He dropped to his knee then, his free hand going out to take hers gently, his eyes soft as they locked with hers. She was doing her best to hold back her tears, but he could tell that she wasn’t succeeding. “Will you marry me?”

She let out a chuckle then, her mouth turning upward into a giant smile, her eyes shimmering through her tears as she nodded her head at him softly. “Yes Ethan.” She whispered. “I’ll marry you.” Ellie’s squeal of delight was enough to send them both into a fit of laughter as he opened the black velvet box in his hands.

“Preeettty.” Ellie dragged out, her little eyes going wide at the ring in Ethan’s hands.

“It is indeed very pretty isn’t it?” Leanne asked softly, her eyes shifting upward from the object to meet with Ethan’s eyes. He had done his very best to meet her standard of white gold, but since that was all he had to work with, he had had to guess on the rest of it. 

“You like it?” He whispered as he removed it from the box and slid it onto her ring finger. She nodded her head at him then, her eyes glowing as she locked them with his.

“I love it.” She whispered back. “And I love you. Both of you.” She dropped a kiss to Ellie’s head then, her eyes softening as the girl snuggled against her chest, her arms wrapping tightly around her neck.

“I love you too.” He whispered back, leaning in to press a gentle kiss against her lips before turning to press one against Ellie’s head. He dropped his head down to her belly then, pressing a feather light kiss against the material of her t-shirt. “All of you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **There is a very strong possibility that I will write an epilogue to this, so stay tuned.

**Author's Note:**

> ***I’m feeling extremely self-conscious about sharing this story, so comments would be great to let me know that you guys are loving it as much I do!


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